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View Full Version : What should I do


tmmoore63
Oct 27, 2007, 07:51 AM
I am a 44 year old male, I think. All of my life I knew I was different in the way of feeling like a female. I have always dreamed of being a female. I have been crossdressing my entire life. I have recently went through 2 years of gender counseling and they said that I am definitely transgendered. They wanted me to continue on with other counseling with one who actually makes the call on what gender would make me happy and also sets me up with a gender doc to get me started on hormones. I am married and I do have children and we are all open about this and they do accept it. My wife thinks I will be better as a female and happier. We have told family and friend and they all seem to be OK with this as well. I have even order female hormones over the net and am now taking them. Now if I decide to become female all the way I feel like I will lose my family and my wife. Am I being selfish to my needs or will I still be in everyone's life just in a different way? Should I continue on with transitioning into a female? I hat having a male body and I truly feel like I was born with the wrong parts. What should I do?
Thanks everyone,
Tessa

tmmoore63
Oct 27, 2007, 11:39 AM
Thanks no one for your help. I figured from this site I might get some advice from someone.
Tessa

shygrneyzs
Oct 27, 2007, 11:50 AM
Do you expect us to be here all the time? This is all volunteer, no one is paid to be here or on a schedule. I just saw your post now. But I will answer you as best I can.

You have a supportive wife and your family. That is a blessing. Many people who go through the trasngender process meet with hostility, frustration, anger, even down right hatred from their family.

I think you are doing the right thing, from reading what you have said about your long term feelings and that you have taken the right steps with counseling and doctors. You must have felt so strongly that you started this so please finish what you started. If you stop, in order to hold onto your wife, you will not be happy. You might even regret quitting. But my question to you is this - when you do complete your changeover, you will be a woman in all the senses possible - so why would you want to be married to a woman? Are you atttracted to your wife as a continued partner? More importantly, is she attracted to you, in the personage of a woman? What has she said about that?

You need to consider her feelings about that. If she says she loves you but does not love you as a female sexual partner, then understand that and give her the respect she deserves and part as husband and wife. She no doubt will still care for you but perhaps cannot love you as she loves you now.

It is a tough situation, yes. But you have embarked on the journey and this seems to bring you peace. Follow through, as you have wanted. Continue counseling. I also hope your wife and family are receiving therapy also - as it will only come together with all of you united. I wish you blessings.