We are on a limited budget as far as our wedding goes. We want to spend more money on the rings and honeymoon than the wedding. So, we want something intimate and special but small.

So these were the two options that we were thinking:
1. A small ceremony in his parent's backyard. There would be flowers, us, close friends and family and his ordained father (who we intend on asking to do this).

2. Court House. My question? Do they just say the words and give you the certificate? Or can they have an actual ceremony with dress and tux and perhaps a flower girl?

Thanks in advance for all the help and advice. :D

1. The coolest back yard wedding I went to was a wedding/pig roast/pool party for a cousin. They had the whole pig. It was really cool. Yes, the bride got thrown in the pool. That one was very informal.

2. I went to a court house wedding. Maybe 10 people tops. Dressed yes. Flower girl. I don't remember. Reception was at a nearby restaurant.

Definitely backyard. It seems a lot more special and personal. I think after you get married you would really be thankful that it was at a place that you can revisit. If it is in the backyard, you can decorate it however you want to, have it anytime you want to, have however many people you would like there, and have the ceremony the way you want it. I also think the backyard wedding could have endless possibilities even on a tight budget.
I really know nothing of court house weddings. I would imagine that it smells like an old building with a lot of books, lol :p. There also probably wouldn't be very much room either.
So I say absolutely go for the backyard wedding. It could be very pretty in any season you choose (besides winter=too cold). Fall- you would have all the pretty leaves changing colors and so on. Spring- would be warm and flowers would be blooming..
I think once you start planning the backyard wedding you won't regret it =).

In our area the court house wedding, the couple, the judge and a witness. Most here are done in the judges office while the judge is not on the bench.

And you actually don't get any certificate at the wedding, not even a church wedding, the real marriage license is signed and return to the court house, and in a few weeks you can go to the court house and get a copy of it.

Some pastors give their own personal certificates but they are just for frameing, not a real license.

I do a lot of backyard weddings, some are really fun, the best couple was a cowboy theme ( western) or a beach party theme.

If you're asking his father, you don't need a courthouse wedding which would be performed by a judge.

If you do the backyard wedding, all you need is the marriage license to sign, his dad, the two of you and some witnesses. My father-in-law married us a few months ago. :) I vote for a nice backyard wedding which would be so much more personal.

Good luck deciding!

If you're asking his father, you don't need a courthouse wedding which would be performed by a judge.

If you do the backyard wedding, all you need is the marriage license to sign, his dad, the two of you and some witnesses. My father-in-law married us a few months ago. :) I vote for a nice backyard wedding which would be so much more personal.

Good luck deciding!


We would only be asking his father if we decided against the backyard wedding. I can't decide which one I want, and wanted some feedback on people's opinions.

I want my friends and family there, and that is one of the reasons that I'm thinking about the backyard wedding...

Definitely backyard. It seems a lot more special and personal. I think after you get married you would really be thankful that it was at a place that you can revisit. If it is in the backyard, you can decorate it however you want to, have it anytime you want to, have however many people you would like there, and have the ceremony the way you want it. I also think the backyard wedding could have endless possibilities even on a tight budget.
I really know nothing of court house weddings. I would imagine that it smells like an old building with a lot of books, lol :p. There also probably wouldnt be very much room either.
So I say absolutely go for the backyard wedding. It could be very pretty in any season you choose (besides winter=too cold). Fall- you would have all the pretty leaves changing colors and so on. Spring- would be warm and flowers would be blooming..
I think once you start planning the backyard wedding you wont regret it =).


Thank you. Good advice, but unfortunately I didn't think about the fact that there are dog houses in the backyard, I was just focused on the fact that there is a beautiful pond. We are going to talk to his parents and see if there is some way to move the dog houses out for the day..,. they are huge. And also the back yard is kind of small so I don't think that we could really have that many people there.

If the backyard isn't big enough, you could get a permit to have it in a public/private park or on the beach. It all depends, but sometimes those permits may only cost $50 or $100.

If the backyard isn't big enough, you could get a permit to have it in a public/private park or on the beach. It all depends, but sometimes those permits may only cost $50 or $100.


Thanks for the advice..

Fr. Chuck,

Is that a Tennessee thing where you don't get a copy of the license? Or is that particular to your church? The reason I ask is that in Michigan, the groom is provided one of three copies of the marriage certificate immediately following the (Roman Catholic) ceremony. The officiant keeps one copy for the church, and the third copy is sent to the state for filing.

My vote (if I may offer one) is to do the backyard thing. Marriage is all about a man and a woman growing the family. What better way to celebrate the union than to do so with your family, at your family's home?

But no matter what you choose, it's going to be fan-freaking-tastic. Congratulations!

Fr. Chuck,

Is that a Tennessee thing where you don't get a copy of the license? Or is that particular to your church? The reason I ask is that in Michigan, the groom is provided one of three copies of the marriage certificate immediately following the (Roman Catholic) ceremony. The officiant keeps one copy for the church, and the third copy is sent to the state for filing.

My vote (if I may offer one) is to do the backyard thing. Marriage is all about a man and a woman growing the family. What better way to celebrate the union than to do so with your family, at your family's home?

But no matter what you choose, it's going to be fan-freaking-tastic. Congratulations!


Well, thank you. I'm pretty excited. And no matter what there will tons of family there.

Back yard all the way!! It is a little more special than just wlaking in saying your vows and walking out. My sis got married at the JP and there were so many people standing in line and they just kept pushing people through. If you do it on your own in a back yard, you can take as much time as you would like, and it would probably be a little more memorable for you and your families! Not only that... but I bet his father would be tickled to marry his son and daughter in-law:p Whatever you do decide, its your day, and you will be beautiful!
Good luck and God Bless you both in your new life together!

Thank you... I think this is the way that we are leaning... but we are looking into a park or something to that effect. Somewhere outdoors and spacious.

Good for you, I was also going to tell you a great place to get your flowers cheap and they are so fresh and beautiful!! Check it out: http://www.mr-roses.com/:o Hopefully you can save some $$ there also!

I recently attended a wedding on our state capitol grounds. The grounds are lovely with fountains, gardens and beautiful statues, lawns perfectly manicured, and not a frisbee throwing person with dogs in sight (as you might find in a public park). The photos were incredible, and although there were only about 30 guests, with white rented chairs set up and a simple arch, the setting was lovely. Do you have a similar location you could use? There was no cost to the couple for using the grounds, just had to be cleared with security and follow an established time-frame. Best of luck to you!

My cousin was married in a state park - it wasn't very expensive. She held the reception in the backyard of her home. When I got married I picked a location about 2 hours away - made it a lot cheaper. I think grand total (site, food, dress, etc) for 100 people was about $5K. Maybe that's more than you were thinking, but look at sites in less expensive areas (provided you live in a metro/urban area) and you can save a lot of money.

I have just been married on `14th Feb 09, we went to a small private House/Chapel belonging to an officiator, for a not too large of a fee she provided flowers, my bouquet, champagne and wore her robes and officiated our marriage with nice vows and wonderful background music, after much thought we decided to have only 2 close friends as witnesses and forget the family! I know your situation may be different , all I'm saying is small ,more private ceremonies are so nice , no cold courthouse , but at the same time special, I still wore a wedding dress even though the wedding party consisted of 5 altogether , go for the backyard and have a wonderful day and a wonderful future .
( our ceremony was held in USA )

Ps... a few of my photos are on my blog :Alison Michelle (http://candyflossgarazon.blogspot.com/)

I'm assuming you're already married by now CM. Do tell! Inquiring minds want to know! ;) I'd like to hear how it all worked out, and what you decided on.