So anyway I asked a question on here some time ago about what woman want because I've never BEEN with one before. I got the answer really that I need more confidence which was true, I'm more out going, run my own job, I jog now to get 'in shape' even though I isn't 'fat', and do talk a lot and get out more but still NOTHING. My mate (whos no more attractive) and I were at this pub two weeks ago and in no time at all without even talking to her she just came over and gave him her number! He did'nt do anything!! What'av I gota do REALLY. So I'm giving it till the end of nxt month, if by the end of October I'm still a virgin then I'm either never going to speak to woman again or turn gay. So other than confidence please tell me what to SAY to woman. What chat up lines have you ladys been told that WORK. Please please help!!
Thank you

So i'm giving it till the end of nxt month, if by the end of october i'm still a virgin then i'm either never gona speak to woman again or turn gay.

You CANNOT think like this. I have never had a boyfriend, but I can't say I've never had lads interested. I do not know how you approach women, what your chat up lines are, but what will turn a woman off is you forcing on sex from the start! Maybe I am abnormal, I do not know, but I have just been in a situation where I got involved with someone who was sex obbessed, and it didn't work for me. I have basically been left traumatised by it all, and for the time being I am staying well clear of men, as I do not wish to experience hurt in that way ever again. It has really effected me.

You just need to go out there, you NEED to be patient, if you go out hunting for a girl, you ARE NOT going to find one, these situations take time.

My only advice, is go out have fun and do not search, if you don't search you may find they come to you. If not try and chat to girls but don't scare them, by forcing things on them, a lot of women like to take things slow, get to know a lad!

Hope this helps

I don't meet a girl and say 'u wona have sex love?' lol, and I'm not sex mad by the way, its just more frustrated and feeling left behind by my age group (everyone I know has 'done it btw'), I think I'm just getting a little sick of bothering. Talking to girls isn't natural to me and their quite intimerdating actually, by the way I isn't got any 'pick up lines' lol

Women can sense desperation... trust me... when I was single and looking women never came running. Now I'm married and not looking at all and I have women come on to me time to time. That's not counting the ones that aren't so overt about it.


Trust me confidence is just part of it. If women see you as needy they will stay away. The moment you stop worrying about finding a woman or looking at women in a "oh I wish she would talk to me i'm feeling so lonely" look you will see things change.

First of all how old are you? Second of all I'm 25 and I'll tell you that most girls get excited when they see a good looking guy that walks bye a leaves a traces of cologne. Personally I love Estee Lauders Pleasures for guys. Second be natural most girls get annoyed by those lame pick up lines. If you can make her laugh and have a causal conversation with her then your off to a great start don't push her away by trying to pressure her and make sure that your first impression is one to be remembered. Other than that be patient things don't happen overnight.

^ I've just turned 20.

thanks for the advise, I think I do rush things a little, I'm not the most patience person in the world by the way.

it's just so intimerdating going up to a woman and start talking though, all my mates do it, so may be due to no confidence, thank you

You have plenty of life ahead of you. What is your rush? Meeting women at a pub is not necessarily a good thing. Patience is definitely key, if you do not have that then honestly you will be trying to push to go far but will not get anywhere.

Hi... I think you are exaggerating a little bit... so what if you are 20 and still virgin!! Do not rush things... btw is it your picture?? If yes I think you are handsome and attractive... it's maybe the way you approach them or maybe you are not in the right place or with the right person for you...

Cheer up & take it easy on yourself... Mr. Handsome..

Ms. Redrose

Hi.... I think you are exaggerating a little bit...so what if you are 20 and still virgin!!! Do not rush things ....btw is it your picture??? If yes I think you are handsome and attractive...it's maybe the way you approach them or maybe you are not in the right place or with the right person for you ...

Cheer up & take it easy on yourself... Mr. Handsome..

Ms. Redrose


That is my picture, and thank you very much for the complement :D, I think part of it has to do with how nervous I get as well, its not that I wona rush things, more like I wona experience what all of my friends have an not feel as left out, it's a running joke by the way, but thank you for the advice, I'm going to try to take things a lot easyer thanks

Well you are most welcome... I post what I think... you really look handsome and attractive... am not flirting ;) but it's the truth... things will happen at the proper time and the most important thing is to happen with the right person... Take care Mr. Handsome

Ms. Redrose


That is my picture, and thank you very much for the complement :D, i think part of it has to do with how nervous i get as well, its not that i wona rush things, more like i wona experience what all of my friends have an not feel as left out, its a running joke btw, but thank you for the advice, i'm gona try to take things alot easyer thanks

Hey bro, next time you go to a bar, try going with the attitude that you don't really care if you meet someone or not... focus on having fun. If you see a girl that you want to talk to, go and talk to her. What do you have to lose. I promise you that the world will not end because of that particular conversation.
You do not have to be clever or witty, just be yourself. Girls like honest. Of course, I'm gay, so its not like I'm a real expert, but meeting girls has to be easier than meeting dudes.
Just walk up and say something like, " hey, would you like to dance", or " i have to admit, im not very good at this sort of thing, but i couldnt let this night end without knowing your name"... sounds corny, but honest really is the best policy... have fun and quit stressing. It will happen when you least expect it... and when it does, you will kick yourself for not trying it sooner. Good luck. By the way, if you do give up on girls, try one of those lines on me... haha just kidding... you'll be fine.

hey bro, next time you go to a bar, try going with the attitude that you dont really care if you meet someone or not... focus on having fun. if you see a girl that you want to talk to, go and talk to her. what do you have to lose. i promise you that the world will not end because of that particular conversation.
you do not have to be clever or witty, just be yourself. girls like honest. of course, im gay, so its not like im a real expert, but meeting girls has to be easier than meeting dudes.
just walk up and say something like, " hey, would you like to dance", or " i have to admit, im not very good at this sort of thing, but i couldnt let this night end without knowing your name"... sounds corny, but honest really is the best policy... have fun and quit stressing. it will happen when you least expect it... and when it does, you will kick yourself for not trying it sooner. good luck. btw, if you do give up on girls, try one of those lines on me... haha just kidding.... you'll be fine.


I agree with him... don't you think if you go "gay" that you will have to "look" for a date too? Hold your head up... don't look like you're a lost puppy and girls will start to approach YOU :) I also agree with Npgreeneyes... we love a man that smells good
Good luck

If you just want sex with a hot girl, I can't (refuse to) help you. People that use punchlines and techniques and stuff are just putting on a fake personality to attract their next victim into a one-night stand. If you want to actually meet a girl that you want to be your girlfriend, being yourself is the best way. They say it on TV shows all the time, yet it's so hard to remember. If you meet a girl while being yourself and she likes you, then you have it made because she likes you.

I'm going on 20 too. It's hard to be a virgin in a society where your peers judge you on how much action you get. It's no reason to give up women or go gay though.

If you just want sex with a hot girl, I can't (refuse to) help you. People that use punchlines and techniques and stuff are just putting on a fake personality to attract their next victim into a one-night stand. If you want to actually meet a girl that you want to be your girlfriend, being yourself is the best way. They say it on TV shows all the time, yet it's so hard to remember. If you meet a girl while being yourself and she likes you, then you have it made because she likes you.

I'm going on 20 too. It's hard to be a virgin in a society where your peers judge you on how much action you get. It's no reason to give up women or go gay though.



I understand what you are saying but I have been myself all the time so far and it don't work FACT. I've met a range of girls with different personalitys and interests as me but still I don't have a chance, so any punchlines or techniques would be more than welcome.

What is the best things to say to girls by the way, like flirty things?

Thanks for the post, you sound like a lot of my friends telling me to be myself, then they go off and somehow pull:eek: :( :( :(

Umm... that's not how gay works.

If you really want to have sex, and you're not looking for a relationship, who cares if you act like yourself? I know it's shameless, but go to any bar and you'll see that both men and women are out on the prowl. Then, on Monday morning, they're back at their offices leading perfectly respectable lives.

As for what to say to women, I have no idea. Straight people have a different protocol for hook-ups. I don't understand it, you're both their for the same reason yet both act like you're looking for love.

First off if you think you can turn gay then you are gay and woman don't usually seek out gay men for physical intimacy. From your picture you look like a handsome guy so I would guess it is the way you carry yourself. This sounds silly but go out with your buddies one night and bring a video camera. Video tape how they interact with woman and have them video tape you as well. Don't tell them why you're doing it just make up some stupid reason they can relate to. When you get home study the video. Pay close attention to what they are doing that you aren’t doing. Are you slouching or looking like you have a 2x4 up your tail? Are you walking around looking like your best friend just died? Are you looking at the floor when you talk to a girl or in her eyes? Body language tells a lot about a person and you need to know what your body language is saying. One thing I will tell you is a sweet flirty smile and a confident look can be a aphrodisiac or at least peek a woman’s curiosity.

Well Dude they are all telling you the truth I have a had 42 year old woman hit on me I'm not the best looking I don't think but I'm telling you its just best to keep on going and just live your life as soon as the right one comes along you will know that's for sure I'm still single with open eyes of course but I'm not actively trying to get a girl friend if She comes my way then so be it if not I'm in no hurry I wish you luck dude make sure patience is a virtue and good things do come to those who wait ;]

So anyway i asked a question on here some time ago about what woman want because i've never BEEN with one before. I got the answer really that i need more confidence which was true, i'm more out going, run my own job, i jog now to get 'in shape' even though i aint 'fat', and do talk alot and get out more but still NOTHING. My mate (whos no more attractive) and i were at this pub two weeks ago and in no time at all without even talking to her she just came over and gave him her number!! he did'nt do anything!!!!!! What'av i gota do REALLY. So i'm giving it till the end of nxt month, if by the end of october i'm still a virgin then i'm either never gona speak to woman again or turn gay. So other than confidence please tell me what to SAY to woman. what chat up lines have you ladys been told that WORK. please please help!!!
Thank you
You have to follow what your heart and gutt instict tells you- By the way no one turns GAY

First off if you think you can turn gay then you are gay and woman don't usually seek out gay men for physical intimacy. From your picture you look like a handsome guy so I would guess it is the way you carry yourself. This sounds silly but go out with your buddies one night and bring a video camera. Video tape how they interact with woman and have them video tape you as well. Don't tell them why you're doing it just make up some stupid reason they can relate to. When you get home study the video. Pay close attention to what they are doing that you aren’t doing. Are you slouching or looking like you have a 2x4 up your tail? Are you walking around looking like your best friend just died? Are you looking at the floor when you talk to a girl or in her eyes? Body language tells a lot about a person and you need to know what your body language is saying. One thing I will tell you is a sweet flirty smile and a confident look can be a aphrodisiac or at least peek a woman’s curiosity.


I'm going out at the weekend and going to watch my m8's and other people, chears, I do think that'll help, thanks :D

Something's that really turn me off about guys

When they act like lonely can't get anybody like pity me and go out with me cause I can't stand being alone any more
When they act desperate like they want to go out with you but they act so desperate like they would be happy with Broom Hilda.
When they act like they are not interested in you a person that really intrigues them and they really aren't interested to go out with you they just want to get to the sex part
When they act phony like they are interested in you and your interests and they aren't
When they act loud and obnoxious

Enjoy life. Sex isn't all it is cracked up to be at least when it is with the wrong one it tends to cause a whole new set of problems. You say you are nervous and shy... some girls actually do find that attractive and they are probably more the type for you than girls that are just out to get some. So don't settle for less.
I am 52 and the best years of my life have been the years that I didn't bother with guys or what they had to offer.

Think that maybe when you do meet the right one your night will be more special the very first time around because it is the right one.

Somethings that really turn me off about guys

when they act like lonely can't get anybody like pity me and go out with me cause I can't stand being alone any more
when they act desperate like they want to go out with you but they act so desperate like they would be happy with Broom Hilda.
When they act like they are not interested in you a person that really intrigues them and they really aren't interested to go out with you they just want to get to the sex part
when they act phony like they are interested in you and your interests and they aren't
when they act loud and obnoxious

Enjoy life. sex isn't all it is cracked up to be at least when it is with the wrong one it tends to cause a whole new set of problems. You say you are nervous and shy...some girls actually do find that attractive and they are probably more the type for you than girls that are just out to get some. So don't settle for less.
I am 52 and the best years of my life have been the years that I didn't bother with guys or what they had to offer.

Think that maybe when you do meet the right one your night will be more special the very first time around because it is the right one.


I only understand the last paragraph of this by the way, I'm not sure if your having a go at me by starting it as 'something that turns me off about guys' or not? also I have no idea what a Broom Hilda is? please elaborate

In response to the part I got: I'm not looking for THE ONE, partly because I don't believe that there is any one person for another, but also because I don't know how, I wona know how to speak to girls and what is perceived by them as attractive. At some point me and the person I'll 'loose it' to will meet and one of us will have to make the first move so knowing how to do it and 'attract' them will be handy.

Thank you for you're the comment

. sex isn't all it is cracked up to be.

Sorry for this but from what I've heard it is... if not better...

All I am saying is be yourself and you will eventually find a girl that you are happy with. No need to rush just to keep up with your friends. As you say there may be NO RIGHT ONE but there are plenty of wrong ones and bad relationships can be a nightmare.
You wanted to know how to be around a girl. The turn off thing was just my how a guy shouldn't be around a girl. Basically not acting desperate and a broom hilda means you would be happy to have a girl you would in NO WAY be interested in unless you were desperate. I am not saying you are desperate but don't get so desperate that it clouds your vision. Like another person says you seem like a decent good looking guy. I am sure you will find a girl that is good for you soon.
Best wishes and make wise choices

i only understand the last paragraph of this btw, im not sure if your having a go at me by starting it as 'something that turns me off about guys' or not?, also i have no idea what a Broom Hilda is?, please elaborate

In response to the part i got: im not looking for THE ONE, partly because i dont believe that there is any one person for another, but also because i dont know how, i wona know how to speak to girls and what is percieved by them as attractive. at some point me and the person i'll 'loose it' to will meet and one of us will have to make the first move so knowing how to do it and 'attract' them will be handy.

thank you for your the comment

Another viewpoint of what they said is those are the sort of ways guys can behave that make women keep their distance. Yeah I'm a guy, and yeah I see guys act like that all the time. And they are almost always the ones that never get laid, they are the ones that are always alone, and most of them completely fail to understand why that's the case. IF you find any of those things to be your situation stop doing them. THere are so many ways to attract women, being genuine and yourself is the best. As long as you avoid the universal taboo behaviors listed above.

A Broom Hilda is an ugly short fat little witch in the comic strips that is always chasing after men but they find her very repulsive, the comic strip if you wish to Google it up is named "Broom Hilda".

Well I am genuine around girls but they don't seem to want what type of person I am.
That's why I were thinking of 'acting' more like some people I know and treating them not as kindly as I do.
I know girls like the bad boy so perhaps that can work? I do understand that changing yourself for someone else isn't good but then again I'm getting desperate

Like I said don't ACT desperate or turn into a 'bad' guy, but you could give that impression if you think it will work girls do seem to like it. I think you will do fine as long as you stay true to yourself cause I have a feeling you are a really sweet guy that girls should go for.

So anyway i asked a question on here some time ago about what woman want because i've never BEEN with one before. I got the answer really that i need more confidence which was true, i'm more out going, run my own job, i jog now to get 'in shape' even though i aint 'fat', and do talk alot and get out more but still NOTHING. My mate (whos no more attractive) and i were at this pub two weeks ago and in no time at all without even talking to her she just came over and gave him her number!! he did'nt do anything!!!!!! What'av i gota do REALLY. So i'm giving it till the end of nxt month, if by the end of october i'm still a virgin then i'm either never gona speak to woman again or turn gay. So other than confidence please tell me what to SAY to woman. what chat up lines have you ladys been told that WORK. please please help!!!
Thank you

LOL, you're rant is humorous. Don't worry so much that's the problem. You see we as males must ooze confidence. Even if you don't see it yourself women's capability of interpreting body language is x100 ours. You know even if you don't show it if you are the smallest amount of nervous or anxious they will pick it up. That's a fact. You know what you need is to go to a very public and crowded place with lots of girls for a few weekends and talk to and ask for a 100 girls phone numbers. Even if they reject you I guarantee you by the end you will be much smoother and more composed. Just like learning to play the guitar practice makes perfect.

Having a hard time finding a date with a woman doesn't make you want to be a butt pirate. Totally different thought processes going on there. Plus you would still have to learn to pick up guys... see my point?

Do you have ANY female friends that can honestly tell you how you present yourself.

I'm willing to bet you aren't presenting yourself the way you think you are. It takes a fair amount of skill to be able to objectively look at yourself and spot flaws in behavior.

And Listen to what enigmagnetic said... there is a lot of truth to it.

i know girls like the bad boy so perhaps that can work? i do understand that changing yourself for someone else aint good but then again im getting desperate

Desperation makes for strange bedfellows. BTW I don't necessarily think it is the bad boy women like... it's the bad boy that they think only they can tame most of them like. It's a challenge like the pristine little woman men think must be a tiger in the dark. The bad thing about a challenge is that when you've met it, the next challenge must be even greater for a similar high.

well i am genuine around girls but they dont seem to want what type of person i am. thats why i were thinking of 'acting' more like some ppl i know and treating them not as kindly as i do.

Maybe instead of thinking about what kind of person you should appear to be (especially being meaner), you could ask women about themselves. Then really listen to their answers. Think in terms of finding out more about how they think, what their values are. Ask where they'd like to be in one year or if they could change a rule, which one would it be. You can probably think of a better question that would start a conversation. Of course, you do have to start talking to them first. But be curious about them as people. I hope you won't stop being kind.

Asking