doranc
Jun 10, 2007, 03:42 PM
Hi,
I have this question about 'boyfriend and money', I guess here is where it fits best.
I wanted to go on this trip, but my boyfriend didn't have money. So I said I'd pay for everything. (It's the 2nd trip I'm paying for). This time, it's a gift for his birthday.
Now almost everything is paid for, and I'm running out of money. I promised to take him to the best windsurf spot and hire the equipment, but I'm not sure I can manage. I prefer surf myself, and it's much cheaper. But he absolutely loves windsurf, and this place is like a windsurf mecca, so I'd love it for him to make the best of this trip.
The thing is, we're both university students, graduating this year; I have a job already, but he's really busy at school and doesn't work yet. That's why he's so broke. His parents offered to give him an allowance till things get better, but he refused.
My question is - should I ask him to contribute to this trip? Why would he refuse his parents' allowance, but accept my money again and again? Even when I'm nearly as broke as him? Should I tell him 'I'm paying for surf - if you want windsurf, pay for it yourself'? I've already paid for the flight and the hotel, which is like 6 x what he spent on my birthday gift. We could get through on my money, but it wouldn't be the same. Also, he does have some money stashed away.
So.. is it unfair for me to ask? I'm still hoping he'd offer to help out, but what if he doesn't? I know I promised, and I've kept my word, but the budget is getting real tight, and I hate to count every cent when on holidays. Should I tell him to accept his parents' money?
He might say, 'It wasn't my idea, you insisted, I told you I had no money'... I know it's wrong to ask, but I just think that if the other person is going out of her way for you to have a good time, you should help out a little if you have the possibility. I'm afraid I'll end up resenting him for not offering any help.
Well, if anyone's got any thoughts, you're welcome. Sorry the post got so long.
I have this question about 'boyfriend and money', I guess here is where it fits best.
I wanted to go on this trip, but my boyfriend didn't have money. So I said I'd pay for everything. (It's the 2nd trip I'm paying for). This time, it's a gift for his birthday.
Now almost everything is paid for, and I'm running out of money. I promised to take him to the best windsurf spot and hire the equipment, but I'm not sure I can manage. I prefer surf myself, and it's much cheaper. But he absolutely loves windsurf, and this place is like a windsurf mecca, so I'd love it for him to make the best of this trip.
The thing is, we're both university students, graduating this year; I have a job already, but he's really busy at school and doesn't work yet. That's why he's so broke. His parents offered to give him an allowance till things get better, but he refused.
My question is - should I ask him to contribute to this trip? Why would he refuse his parents' allowance, but accept my money again and again? Even when I'm nearly as broke as him? Should I tell him 'I'm paying for surf - if you want windsurf, pay for it yourself'? I've already paid for the flight and the hotel, which is like 6 x what he spent on my birthday gift. We could get through on my money, but it wouldn't be the same. Also, he does have some money stashed away.
So.. is it unfair for me to ask? I'm still hoping he'd offer to help out, but what if he doesn't? I know I promised, and I've kept my word, but the budget is getting real tight, and I hate to count every cent when on holidays. Should I tell him to accept his parents' money?
He might say, 'It wasn't my idea, you insisted, I told you I had no money'... I know it's wrong to ask, but I just think that if the other person is going out of her way for you to have a good time, you should help out a little if you have the possibility. I'm afraid I'll end up resenting him for not offering any help.
Well, if anyone's got any thoughts, you're welcome. Sorry the post got so long.