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-   -   Virgin at 21? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=616304)

  • Dec 1, 2011, 10:31 PM
    falconflight
    Virgin at 21?
    Okay well this is my first question on this site, so we'll see how this goes haha.

    I'm a 21 male virgin. I'm not a loser or anything, I workout a decent amount to take care of myself and all, I am not doing it for religious reasons or holding out for marriage, it's just I haven't really been in the right situation I guess. Through high school (and now college) I moved twice so I didn't really have a girlfriend, or go to parties, or however normal people lose it. I have had a few chances to lose it to some easy girls (no offense to anyone) but I want it to be with the right girl. None of my friends are virgins and they are the typical dudes who lie and do whatever to get into girls pants (it works for some reason) but I won't stoop to that level because I actually care about girls who enter my life even if it isn't for long. I guess my question is am I weird or something? I get shy around girls if I don't know them, but after like a few days of knowing them I get very cool around them and open up. In the past a few girls asked if I was a virgin and I said yes, but I don't know if I should tell them I am or I'm not. I'm obviously confused and you probably think I'm a weirdo by now so I'm going to stop typing haha, if you could add anything I'd appreciate it a lot and thanks.
  • Dec 2, 2011, 06:09 AM
    DaniCalifornia
    Nobody on this website would have called you a loser anyway, we're here to help.

    There really is nothing to worry about. I assure you it's nothing to do with your looks, it's just that you haven't met the right person. Don't feel ashamed to admit you are, when those silly friends of yours grow up they'll wish they were more like you and waited for someone that deserved it.

    What kind of woman are you waiting for? You need to link that to the types of places you look. I think you need some new friends too, seeing as these ones aren't exactly helping you meet a nice lady.

    X Dani
  • Dec 2, 2011, 07:46 AM
    Aurora_Bell
    You're not a weirdo. You are the exception to the rule. You were obviously raised to respect yourself and others regardless of sex. I think it's great and very refreshing.

    If this is something that is important to you, than by all means save yourself for that special girl. You are still young, and it's not at all weird for you to still be a virgin.
  • Dec 2, 2011, 10:37 AM
    falconflight
    Thanks you two :)

    I just kind of feel like the longer it takes to lose it, the more strange a girl will think I am for being one.
  • Dec 2, 2011, 10:58 AM
    Wondergirl
    You're telling me someone is keeping score now? Virginity used to be a given, back in the days when rocks were cooling and we all had dinosaurs as pets.
  • Dec 2, 2011, 11:05 AM
    DaniCalifornia
    Absolutely not. I had many many boyfriends before I gave mine away at 18, yet I still wish I saved it for my current partner! My current boyfriend is actually 21, and although I accept his past, I feel he lost it way too young.

    X Dani
  • Dec 2, 2011, 11:35 AM
    falconflight
    But as a female, you don't think nothing of it like "why's he still a virgin?"
  • Dec 2, 2011, 11:46 AM
    JudyKayTee
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by falconflight View Post
    But as a female, you don't think nothing of it like "why's he still a virgin?"


    In one word - no. I also didn't make it my mission in life to deflower as many virgins as I could.

    I'm a female, but I respected boundaries.

    I also don't recall having a lot of "I'm a virgin" (or not) conversations with people until the relationship was very, very serious.

    Maybe - as WG said - things have changed since I had a pet dinosaur.
  • Dec 2, 2011, 11:58 AM
    Aurora_Bell
    Haha well I never had a pet dinosaur, but no, I wouldn't think that. In fact in all honesty, I would wonder if I met YOUR expectations as a person/intellect!

    I wish I saved mine for someone special.
  • Dec 2, 2011, 12:01 PM
    JudyKayTee
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Aurora_Bell View Post
    Haha well I never had a pet dinosaur, but no, I wouldn't think that. In fact in all honesty, I would wonder if I met YOUR expectations as a person/intellect!

    I wish I saved mine for someone special.


    I'm lucky - I did! Didn't last, didn't marry - but a wonderful, wonderful time in my life. No regrets.
  • Dec 2, 2011, 12:06 PM
    Aurora_Bell
    That is lucky Judy. I lost mine just to lose it. All my friends were doing it kind of thing. It really showed how insecure/low self esteem I had back then. Wish I had the guts to do what I thought was right. Hindsight can be a real---- sometimes.
  • Dec 8, 2011, 08:57 PM
    J2m5s8
    Why does this matter to you so much? You aren't in a committed relationship (preferably married), so sex should not be an issue yet. If you let sex decide who you will spend your life with, you will end up unhappy and unfulfilled.

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