Whenever I start drinking alcohol, I don't want to stop.
Whenever I start drinking alcohol, I don't want to stop until I've finished everything off, and if I could get more I probably would. I hate this feeling. When I'm not drinking, I am fine and don't feel any need to drink alcohol, but when I actually start, or we plan to go out and drink, I don't want it to end.
I don't feel I have enough confidence to dance, socialise and actually have a good time when out at clubs or pubs, unless I am drinking. I used to have a drug problem also, taking Ecstasy and/or speed when I was out at clubs. If I didn't have any, I would end up having a boring night and get totally drunk instead.
I haven't done either of these drugs for around 6 month now and don't intend to either. The alcohol thing is really getting me down though. I like to go out and have a drink, just have a laugh. But sometimes it's like it takes over. Am I an alcoholic? I don't drink very often at all, 2 or 3 times a month maybe, it depends. But when I do drink, I really go for it and hate myself for it the next day.
I wish I didn't feel these urges to want to drink more, anyone have any ideas/suggestions as to what I should do? Or anything on this topic at all?
Thanks
Claire