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Klaipeda · Sep 25, 2007, 03:25 PM

Please help me to find out! I greatly appreciate your opinions!!
I didn't the guy at the beginning ( we know each other for two months now) as he is a cheepskate and agreed very quickly for the sexual relationship in the hope that my feelings towards him will quickly fade out and hoped that his feelings towards me too fade out quickly, so there won't be any heartache to separate just not liking each other anymore.( I saw he likes me, he was smiling at me all the time, looking into my eyes continuosly and I felt that the love is about to happen).I didn't want him pestering me continuosly to achieve me and therefore agreed quickly for sex amd initiated it myself.
The funny thing is after having sex with him several times, I fell in love with this guy but he started to lose interest in me: he calls not so often and it's only me who initiates contacts -sends him sms ( he does not always responds even, but sometimes calls just to talk about himself ).I learned he is a good guy just a bit selfish and this can be improved as he listens what I say and tries to do as I say :)

I appreciate if someone advice me what can I do to return to the beginning stage where he was looking at me like at the miracle. If I stop from having sex with him and hold on for say one year can he again start likeing me more and eventually fall in love with me?

shatteredsoul · Sep 28, 2007, 12:13 PM

WEll you gave it up to soon and now he got what he wanted. I think he enjoyed the chase more than the catch... Guys are like that when you give yourself away before you even know what you feel for them. I think you should be more selective in who you let yourself get that close to.
YOu shouldn't be the only one initiating contact. Stop contacting him at all and see what happens. Seems like his true colors are shining through, he is a jerk!

statictable · Sep 28, 2007, 08:07 PM

Like a wonderful meal, once consumed it's gone.

german1096 · Jan 31, 2008, 06:06 AM

Maybe he is just not into the sex, did you ever ask him about his sexual fantasies or desires? Maybe try it and see where the coversation leads... who knows maybe he is more into the freaky kind of stuff... give him something to remember you by then play cat and mouse a little, not too much though.

Choux · Jan 31, 2008, 11:55 AM

From your description, it sounds like he was just interested in having a "notch in his belt" by having intercourse, not a real give-and-take relationship, I'm sorry to say. He got what he wanted, and now you don't really mean much to him. Don't try to convince yourself that you like him; you'll make yourself a victim. NO good!

LIfe is about having success and failure and learning from what we do. We can't go back and change anything that happens in our lives, we just have to go forward... *smarter* to the ways of the world. :)

Good Luck in the future,

smoothy · Jan 31, 2008, 12:13 PM

I'll agree with several of the previous posters... He got dessert before he found out if he really wanted dinner.

Maybe as you were finding out he was a nice guy he was finding out his initial feeling were just lust, or there was something about you he is seeing he doesn't like.

While it always might be possible to show him something in you he likes, the odds are against it. And the longer you cling to a false hope the harder it will be for you.

You can't make someone change... and you can't make someone like you if you are just the wrong type.

I would consider this a lost cause and look for a guy that doesn't need that effort to keep his attention.