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uniique8 · Nov 21, 2007, 07:13 AM

I was with this guy 5 months ago and our relationship was wonderful. I've never been treated so good and I never felt that way towards someone. He broke up with me for some reasons I still don't understand. A few weeks ago, he called me and asked me back out. I said yes and I thought we were going to start where we left off. It was all good and we wouldn't stop saying we love each other. I was happy! We went to see each other and I noticed that he completely changed. He's not the man I fell in love with. He wasn't romantic, sweet, loving towards me. When I asked him about it he said that he changed over the summer and he thought that being romantic was for little kids. I'M A WOMAN- I NEED LOVE! After we hung out, he didn't call me or text me for a few days. He also didn't recognize me as his girlfriend and deleted my I love you comments on myspace. I felt like he couldn't appreciate his 2nd chance and I didn't think any one in love would act like that! I couldn't take it anymore and when he finally did call, I broke up with him. It hurts because I LOVE him and there's no other man I want to spend the rest of my life with, but he just doesn't make me happy. I admit I'm happier with out him but I do love him. I don't know what to do. :(

mafiaangel180 · Nov 21, 2007, 07:46 AM

Well it's a little too late for me to tell you this... but you shouldn't have laid it all out there for him like that to walk on you. You should have kept your emotions in check and only dished them out to him when he showed you more.

BMI · Nov 21, 2007, 08:06 AM

You wrote that you want to spend the rest of your life with him but he does not make you happy! I think your really confused.

Perhaps you do not like the fact that he called you to get back together(which made you feel wanted and happy)only for him to not show you any mind(which made you feel not wanted and maybe a little angry).

I do think his actions are a bit odd, I mean why call to get back together and then treat you like dirt(I don't like the deleted Myspace messages one bit, that's just rude). Unless he treated you really well before and because you broke up with him he is now trying to play distant? OR he's angry that you broke up with him and this is payback. TRUST ME, guys will do this.

uniique8 · Nov 21, 2007, 02:41 PM

No he broke up with me the first time. And I'm a very open person when it comes to my emotions. I don't lie about them. I let them be known. He says he's not ready4 a relationship so why did he ask me back out. I think HE'S the one confused. And I don't have to feel wanted by him because I am wanted by most of my friends, HIS friends, and a lot of other people. Everyone thinks he's a dumbass and a loser for treating me like this! So many other guys want to be the man of my dreams yet this stupid a hole is. Why do I love him so much when I can get 10 other guys right this minute? He got me sprung you.. IDK what he does to me...

Homegirl 50 · Nov 21, 2007, 02:47 PM

The guy is obviously not the right person for you, and a bit of a jerk. So just thank your lucky stars he is not in your life (you would probably be miserable if he was) and move on.
Don't cry over spilled milk , especially if the milk was sour to begin with.

s_cianci · Nov 21, 2007, 05:23 PM

I admit I'm happier with out him but I do love him. I don't know what to do.

I think you've answered your own question here. If he doesn't make you happy then I don't think you really "love" him. Maybe you love what you thought he was or maybe you love his potential of what he could maybe be. But I really can't believe that you love him. I think that, with time, you'll get used to the idea of not being with him and any residual feelings you may still have for him will disappear.

uniique8 · Nov 22, 2007, 12:59 PM

Thanks guys! You guys helped me understand myself a little bit better. MUAHZ!!

Chery · Nov 22, 2007, 01:28 PM

When I was young and dumb, I rejected the ones that chased me and promised me the world because it was too easy. I wanted to prove that I could get anyone, even the one who does not want me that bad.. It's mostly an ego problem and we just have to admit it. It's OK to feel this way sometimes because of the challenge, but guess who looses in the end...

A lesson learned makes you a bit smarter each time you travel on this emotional journey and there will be more to come, so be a little more selective and don't automatically think the guy that chases you is a wuss, he might just be Mr. Right - so give the other guys a chance to give you the attention and care you deserve.

Lots of luck, and keep us posted.

diya · Nov 23, 2007, 12:15 AM

Hey, I know how you feel... but you know what, he asked you back because he wanted to satiate his ego issues... that he could call upon you anytime he felt like. And please don't get me wrong when I say, it's not love you're thinking you're having for him... it's more of a feeling of neglect and regret that you're going through that you feel how he could just dump you. Get out of this negative feeling. Someone who doesn't make you happy, cannot deserve an iota of your love and time and effort... Go girl... chill... life is too short to fret over guys who make your life no simpler... u know what I mean?

uniique8 · Nov 23, 2007, 07:44 PM

Dam guys I really appreciate all the advice. Like I said, its helped me discover a little bit more of myself. And I understand my emotions a little bit better now. :)

Barbid · Nov 24, 2007, 12:03 AM

Originally Posted by uniique8

I was with this guy 5 months ago and our relationship was wonderful. I've never been treated so good and I never felt that way towards someone. He broke up with me for some reasons I still don't understand. A few weeks ago, he called me and asked me back out. I said yes and I thought we were going to start where we left off. It was all good and we wouldn't stop saying we love each other. I was happy! We went to see each other and I noticed that he completely changed. He's not the man I fell in love with. He wasn't romantic, sweet, loving towards me. When I asked him about it he said that he changed over the summer and he thought that being romantic was for little kids. I'M A WOMAN- I NEED LOVE!! After we hung out, he didn't call me or text me for a few days. He also didn't recognize me as his girlfriend and deleted my i love you comments on myspace. I felt like he couldn't appreciate his 2nd chance and I didn't think any one in love would act like that! I couldn't take it anymore and when he finally did call, I broke up with him. It hurts because I LOVE him and there's no other man I wanna spend the rest of my life with, but he just doesn't make me happy. I admit I'm happier with out him but I do love him. I don't know what to do. :(

You made the first step.. you broke up with him showing him you're not going to take him crap. Now, pick yourself up and find someone else. You will make it.

Chery · Nov 24, 2007, 08:19 AM

There is one factor in all relationship issues that have kind of been put on the side... when in a relationship do we still use protection during sex or do we just assume that the other person is 'clean' and all is well??

When you mentioned his drastic change during the summer, this got me thinking... I could be wrong, but maybe he got something he did not ask for and probably blames you and every girl he's been with - therefore his attitude change.

May I suggest you get tested to reassure that he did not give you something out of pure revenge. In this day and age, anything is possible, and we all know how revengeful people can be, even when they are wrong.

Keep us posted, and good luck dear.

uniique8 · Nov 24, 2007, 06:33 PM

I believe he did give me something- A UTI... but anyone can get a uti without sex.. so I don't know how I got it but I do blame him for it but I haven't told him anything about it because I don't see it as a big deal and I'm not sure if he gave it to me...