I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years. For the past 8 months things have been difficult. I wasn't sure if I loved him anymore. We discussed it and decided to work at it. I am at a place now where I do love him but I'm just not sure if he is the one. We get on well when we are together but the problems start when we are out socliazing. He can get loud and animated and loves talking to everyone. This is his personality and I feel I should have accepted it at this stage but I just can't. I become uptight and agitated and snappy. It ruined all social occasions and we always end up fighting and ruining everyone Else's night. He shouldn't have to chance his personality but I am not sure if I will ever grow to accept it.
Is this a huge problem?

It's a huge problem if you or he feels that it is; strangers online can't decide for you.
Do you have a best friend? What does she say? Get together with friends sometime when he's not available and ask them if they notice it, are bothered by it, or think that you are too uptight about it. Often times your perceptions about someone you are with are largely a reflection of what you think others are thinking. If they brush it off as nothing, then see if you can adjust your own way of thinking. If you can't - consider what the next step will be. I see nothing wrong with saying 'I like you but I don't think we have a long future together.'

If everyone you know thinks he's fine and you are too upset over nothing, it might be a good time to examine yourself. Being ashamed or embarrassed when someone is doing something truly awful is one thing, but if they are just boisterous and all over the place and everyone enjoys it, then what is really going on in you? Jealousy perhaps? A need to control? Often it's the sociable people who last the longest in relationships because they aren't hemmed in by the constraints of one person 24/7. None of us are 100% compatible with someone, so we need outlets for what is different between us. Good luck.

It sounds to me like it is a problem because you have asked this question. From what you say it doesn't sound like he is doing anything wrong. But he doesn't necessarily have to change his personality fundamentally to help with this either. And it sounds like your reaction is over the top and you are punishing him. The solution probably lies in the middle. Some times relationship counselling will get each person to look at each side of the problem from their own point of view then agree to modify both of your behaviour to make it easier to get on and get over this. He calms his behaviour a bit, but it doesn't change his personality and you relax a little more and try to discover why you feel this way (is it how you see other's perceiving you?) Also with things like this any added stress you might have in your lives, like bereavement, losing a job, or even not getting enough sleep can really put a lot of extra pressure and make problems seem much bigger than they are. It sounds like you do love him, and if he loves you then it's worth trying. I hope things work out for you guys.

I think you two should talk about this.you should tell him what you really think and what you feel.nothing is more helpful than a great chat.if you don't end up fighting..
You say that you love him so you just can't let go.if he loves you then he maybe can changes a little bit.and if you really love him then you can ignore how he's acting.that's the way it is I think..

You don't love this guy. You might like him or "need" him to validate you or fill you out in some way -- but you don't love him. As long as he's doing what you want and making you "comfortable" then things are fine but when you feel threatened and fearful, he's anything but loved.

If you love someone, you accept their true nature and see it as a gift instead of a threat. You don't like that he's loud and talkative and engaging in social scenarios because you're so pinched up inside that it makes you feel like he's leaving you out - you feel threatened by that and you feel annoyed and judgmental about his behaviour. Isn't it true that you feel insecure and nervous when he acts like that? You want to pull him in and you want to keep yourself pulled in too!
Also - isn't it true that you ALSO get loud and animated? Yes! When you're snippy and snappy, you're loud and animated.

Chances are he's as tired, or more tired, of your behaviour as you are of his. Can you change things? Yes -- but you have to tap into the place that does love him and wants to be happy and feels GOOD ENOUGH in the presence of all this bubbly, gregarious energy. How does it threaten you? After all... being animated and bubbly or loud just shows that he's excited about life or wants to have a good time and share things with others. Just because you're so miserable doesn't mean he has to be too. He is a different person with a different personality than you - he doesn't have to live as your clone as you would do things. If you are embarrassed by him - this is just a projection of issues you're having with yourself. It's YOUR deal.

And about being pinched and miserable and unloving... it hurts doesn't it. You're not very happy. All this anger at him makes YOU feel distant and unloved too. So stop.
Try to accept this part of his nature as something GOOD instead of as a threat. Tap into your own Bubbly LOUD (enthusiastic self).

I think you are finding out that you hate his annoying traits and though you try you can't t and it. That's okay, as it goes like that sometimes and when you no longer want to work at it, you will leave. Especially if things don't tart working better between you. When you start losing friends because of all the arguing and bickering, I suppose you will either figure out a better way of showing your displeasure, or wait until you get home, or ignoring it.

He doesn't sound like the one to me either. How old are you both?