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    BuriedThrice's Avatar
    BuriedThrice Posts: 23, Reputation: 2
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    #1

    Mar 8, 2012, 11:55 PM
    Should I tell a girl I have a crush on her just to get it off my chest?
    Recently, I started college and met a cute girl in the dorm next to me. My first thought was, "Okay cool! Let's see where this goes." As time goes on, I get to know her a little better and I'm actually finding that she isn't anything like I thought she was. Though I find her to be really attractive, she's also fickle and overly sensitive. It's hard to have a proper conversation with her. I decide that I want to stop pursuing her until I wake up one day and realize that I have a major crush on her. For whatever reason, I can't get her out of my head.

    Some people say she likes me, others say she doesn't, and some people who know are keeping their mouths shut or being cryptic. She's said that I remind her of her younger brother and she calls me a "noble *******". When I was down and out a few weeks ago she was overly concerned for me, which was nice. She'd randomly come into my room to talk or ask me to charge her iPod when she could charge it herself. Our communication has dwindled in the last week and a half and she's stopped coming by the room as often as she used to, but for the last week or so she's all I can think about and the thought of her made it difficult for me to finish my midterms. Although I have this crush on her, I'm trying to avoid any interaction because somehow I don't feel it's worth my time to pursue her and I want to get over her, especially considering that she won't be returning next semester. She's often gotten frustrated with me in conversation because I can't take her seriously. She'll say "Stop laughing and take me seriously! Please!" And then when I take her seriously she can't be serious with me. I've mentioned to her that we'll forever be on different pages so this crush feels completely irrational.

    I don't know what to make of this. People have told me I should just pursue it and see what happens, but I'm hesitant to make a move. Earlier today, I talked to her for the first time in almost a week and someone made mention of how our interaction was really awkward. I'm not sure what to make of her vibes. We're at a point now where we just kind of look at each other every so often but don't say anything. Part of me feels like she may just not be interested as she once was, but she might also be ignoring me just the same as I am with her. Especially, if she's leaving soon and may not want to get involved. Someone was telling me that I should just tell her how I feel even if it resolves in a rejection because I at least will get it off my chest and in 3 months time she won't even be at the school anymore.

    Can anyone help me out here or give me some insight? Thanks so much! I can elaborate further, if need be.
    indya's Avatar
    indya Posts: 357, Reputation: 58
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    #2

    Mar 9, 2012, 03:47 AM
    If you tell her about your crush, and she responds positively, what would be your next step? Considering that you don't match with her nature much and also the fact that she'll be gone in 3 months, how will you handle a situation where she reciprocates your feelings?

    And if her reply is not positive, will it really bother you? This 'crush' may just be mere infatuation. I've also been in a situation where as long as my crush is unknown about the fact that I had a crush on him, there was a lot of excitement, once he knew, the crush evaporated!

    A safe way to go about is, tell her you HAD a crush on her and now you're cool about it.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    Mar 9, 2012, 05:36 PM
    Since you are not that enthusiastic over her, but just want to get over the crush, then say nothing and never lead her on. What's the point in telling some one I have a crush on you, but don't want anything else. Not all feelings should acted on because they confuse you. Sometimes saying nothing especially when you are unsure of the consequences, should be kept to yourself.

    At least until you are more sure, and given it thought.
    mmresd's Avatar
    mmresd Posts: 2,002, Reputation: 553
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    #4

    Mar 9, 2012, 07:53 PM
    Why are you so hesitant to make a move? There is nothing to lose... try... if nothing happens then you are right back to where you are now. If you move forward, then maybe you will do things that you enjoy doing along with learning how to deal with someone that is different than you. An amazing skill to have for when you get a job.

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