My girlfriend and I have been together for eight months. We are both incredibly happy and, at the beginning rarely fought. However, now my insecurities have been causing a lot of problems and we have been fighting. The main problem is that I don't trust her, but I have no reason not to. For example, she will go to a public sporting event and I will worry to the point that I can't do anything else about some other guy trying to do something with her or actually doing it. I worry about guys talking to her. I worry about guys texting her. I worry about guys that she has been friends with since long before she met me. I don't know why I worry about these things and why I worry so much but I need to stop or I fear it will destroy our relationship, which I honestly couldn't handle. How do I stop worrying and get rid of my insecurities?

I know exactly what your going through..

I used to feel the same way, and it's not that the fact that you think she's going to do it, your just very scared that it might happen?!

What helped for me was, each time I got one of those braindead idea's into my head. I would focus all my energy to take my mind off it and onto something else.. because your absolutely right, she is not going to put up with that for long..

And also, if she's up for it - tell her that's this has nothing to do with her, nothing what-so-ever..
But if she reassures you, it may mean a lot to you as well..

Tell her what your problem is, and reassure her that you are working on it, and give a lot of thought to what you say, and do, and recognize its your FEAR that's driving you.

Now what are you so afraid of, and why??

I have been in a very similar position. My last relationship everything was great and I started to have insecurities, made a lot of mistakes, you can read all about them on questions I've asked the same people who are offering advise to you now. I checked emails, text messages, and if I wasn't physically with her she was going off with some other guy (in my mind). After things got so bad, and I can honestly say that there is no way you can stay together if you make her hear of your insecurities, we broke up. To be more exact, one day I came home to watch a movie, have sex, and go to bed with her, and she broke up with me as soon as I stepped through the door. It sucked because t was very unexpected. The root of our breakup was that, although we had developed a lot of different problems, the main concern was my insecurities and the actions that I did because of them instead of trying to control them.

Insecurities is a problem that no one can help you with, only you can find a way tofeel secure, find out what builds your ego, confidence, and self esteem and exploit it. I did. And now I am finding myself in this awesome relationship with a girl who I have gotten the second chance to be with. I feel indestructible and whenever I go out anywhere the aura of confidence is awesome, but let me warn you that it takes a lot of work, and it is a LOT easier to do when you are on your own instead of being in a relationship, but that is my own opinion.

Quit feeling the way you are feeling and just enjoy your girlfriend while the relationship lasts, because if you don't change, then you are a ticking time bomb.

Good luck,

Javi