The boyfriend is 19 years old. He makes absolutely no contribution to the household. Since he was living in Oregon (we are in Washington) I allowed him to visit for a 'few days' at the beginning of October to celebrate my daughter's birthday. He has no car and does not wish to return to Oregon. I told him that he needs to leave several times, and he just tells me no. Of course, my daugthter sides with him. You can cut the tension here with a knife. It is a miserable situation. I am a single mom of two girls and I own the house. Hoping for some advice. Thank you.

Hello L:

According to the law, he IS a month to month tenant. So, instead of TELLING him, you need to start the eviction process... That would be WRITTEN 30 notice to vacate. Once he DOESN'T leave, if that's so, file for eviction in your local court... It's cheap, and fast.

I'll bet he won't tell the sheriff no.

excon

This has been going on a little over a month? In this case, I don't think he has established residency. A lot will depend here on how small a town you live in. If it's a small town where you are on a first name basis with the law enforcement, then I would go to them and tell them you have told him to leave many times and he refuses.

At this point he is a guest and can be kicked out. If the police won't escort him out then you need to play it safe and evict him. Tell him, in writing, to be gone within 30 days or you will go to court and have him removed.

Either way you go, you will probably lose your daughter as well.

Some other things to try is to get a lock for the refrigerator and pantries. DO NOT give one to your daughter. If he wants to eat with you, collect money FIRST. Set a payment schedule, i.e. $3 for a breakfast, $5, for a lunch, $10 for a dinner. Do this in writing as well. If he refuses to pay but tries to eat, call the police and charge him with stealing food.

But the first thing I would do is sit down with your daughter and tell her what you are going to do. Tell her, you wouldn't mind his staying if he contributes to the household, but you can't afford a freeloader.

The thought of losing my daughter is what has made me disinclined to push the issue. Thank you. Your answer was helpful.

I do not know that using the moniker of excon is the best idea, kind of scary, but your advice was helpful... and I thank you. Eviction it is... Lisa Anne.

How old is your daughter? (and this is not meant to be creepy, I just want more info to try to give the best advice that I can being that I may be around her age and may understand better how she thinks and how I could possibly walk you through this without losing her)

I have the same problem but now my daughter is pregnant which of course adds so many emotions into it. Today I told him he had to pay the light bill and he told me he was only going to give me 60 dollars so I told him he had to leave.
That of course prompted a huge fight with my daughter and they ended up packing their things and driving to his dad's house. I am extremely sad but sometimes I think "Tough love" is the way to go. They won't growup bieng taken care of.

This thread is over 2 years old.

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