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    prasmalh847's Avatar
    prasmalh847 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Sep 18, 2010, 07:52 AM
    Why my ex always call me when in need
    I was in relationship with a girl before my marriage. She dumped me due to my rudeness but returned to me when she knows I am getting married. I allowed her to come in my life. We ended having our first sex. I got married but we still remained in touch and continue our relationship. We both felt that we are made for each other sort of. We share our sorrows, emotions, and still continue physically. But now she is getting married and asks me to be her friend. But the real problem is that whenever she is in need she still calls me, what should I do. What does this relationship means love, lust, dependence.

    I have told to my wife about this relationship, she wants me to be loyal to her now. I am in confusion what to do.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #2

    Sep 18, 2010, 10:33 AM

    Harshness Warning

    You cheating idiot, cut the girl from your life, and be loyal to your wife.

    but the real problem is that whenever she is in need she still calls me, what should I do. What does this relationship means love, lust, dependence.
    None of the above. It means you are a weak man who allows another female to come between you and your wife. Totally unacceptable for a marriage.
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
    Uber Member
     
    #3

    Sep 18, 2010, 11:33 AM

    Tonight.. when you pray, if you pray... Thank God I am not your mother in law. I would make you sorry you were born with a penis. You are no stud so stop thinking
    Because you're wife is foolish enough to put up with this and your ex keeps "throwing" herself at you. When they meet a "real man", you'll be history.
    Allie602's Avatar
    Allie602 Posts: 62, Reputation: 18
    Junior Member
     
    #4

    Sep 18, 2010, 02:45 PM
    May I rephrase your question "I am deceiving and hurting my wife for no reason that I can see. Tell me how wrong I am so that I feel better". Honestly, you are an adult and you know exactly the extent of your deception and the right thing to do.
    I am amazed that we as humans can take the beautiful gift of love and marital companionship and treat it like detritus. We are all not so fortunate to have this. The universe gives so abundantly and we are consistently ungrateful, there is a toll. In addition, when we are needlessly cruel to the people who love us without voluntary remorse, sorrow is our reward.
    You know very well the enormity of your deceptiveness. Ask yourself the right questions and act according to the character of some wise and good person. Don't waste your time with foolish concerns and pay attention to the real issues.
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
    Uber Member
     
    #5

    Sep 18, 2010, 03:48 PM

    You are bragging about it. Pretending to be concerned. Any
    Guy can have a wife and a girlfriend. You think it's cool or a sign of your manhood? NOT
    You are a either selecting women of low morals to play around with or their desperate. If your wife knows and puts up with it, she's getting what she deserves.
    answerme_tender's Avatar
    answerme_tender Posts: 1,148, Reputation: 689
    Ultra Member
     
    #6

    Sep 20, 2010, 08:09 AM

    Well mister studly why don't you ask her soon to be husband it he is okay with the situation!! But, hey you manly thing and told your wife about the relationship, hey maybe she will wise up and realize that she also needs a understanding and giving friendship and of course you will be just as understanding and forgiving as she is!!
    Cat1864's Avatar
    Cat1864 Posts: 8,007, Reputation: 3687
    Marriage Expert
     
    #7

    Sep 20, 2010, 09:14 AM

    Why are you confused?

    This turn of events should end any confusion.

    From now on, have absolutely nothing to do with the other woman. Be there for the woman who matters-your wife. Give your wife a chance to build that close of a relationship with you. Put your energy and time into your marriage.

    Stay out of her life. If she comes to you, send her back to her betrothed/husband. Do not accept contact from her and do not contact her.

    I have the impression that neither of you are married/marrying for love. Even an arranged marriage deserves better than you have been giving it. Your wife who gave up her dreams and other relationships to be faithful to you deserves that in return.

    Be the husband you agreed to be when you got married. If you do, then there will be no confusion.

    I do suggest marriage counseling if at all possible to help rebuild the trust you destroyed. Your wife might be somewhat understanding on the surface depending on how deep her feelings for you run, but underneath she is probably about to explode like a volcano. I don't think anyone would blame her.

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