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Russaitaliana03 · Apr 22, 2010, 05:21 PM

I am currently married to my wife now for 22 years in Florida. The passed 10 years she became very verbally abusive and accused me of cheating and kicked me out. She won't grant me a divorce because she claims I was cheating on her. I live on my own now and I have found someone I want to start a life with. If she moves in with me is this considered adultery? Is this Illegal? Can I be imprisoned for this?

JudyKayTee · Apr 22, 2010, 05:37 PM

Yes, it's adultery. Any sexual relatonship with a third party when you are married is adultery.

Do lots of people openly commit adultery? Yes.

Do any of them get arrested? No.

I wouldn't worry about it.

- but why don't you get divorced before you begin another live in relationship?

Your wife doesn't grant you a divorce. The Court grants the divorce following the appropriate legal proceedings.

What your wife does and doesn't want matters very little.

Fr_Chuck · Apr 22, 2010, 07:51 PM

Your wife does not "grant" a divorce, she either agrees to terms and signs, or you file in court, it goes to mediation and then to the judge, who orders it even if she does not want it.

Larken85 · Apr 23, 2010, 05:04 AM

How can it be considered adultery if they are separated. It doesn't have to be a legal separation. That is like saying you cannot date anyone when your wife is dragging out the devorce. That's crap.

Maybe legally its considered adultery, but if you've been separated for any period, don't worry about it. It won't even look bad. Whatever its called its certainly not morally considered adultery and no one would frown upon you for seeing/sleeping with another woman at this point. Don't let the lawyer catch wind of it though, they may throw it in your face.

Kitkat22 · Apr 23, 2010, 05:20 AM

Originally Posted by Larken85

how can it be considered adultery if they are seperated. It doesn't have to be a legal seperation. That is like saying you cannot date anyone when your wife is dragging out the devorce. Thats crap.

Maybe legally its considered adultery, but if you've been seperated for any period of time, don't worry about it. It wont even look bad. Whatever its called its certainly not morally considered adultery and no one would frown upon you for seeing/sleeping with another woman at this point. Don't let the lawyer catch wind of it though, they may throw it in your face.

It is adultery.. as long as you're still married it is. Is it morally wrong? In my opinion if you are married ,stay out someone else's bed until you are divorced!
Yes it is morally wrong and you know that. When you go to court and your ex wife tells the judge you were sleeping with someone ellse look out! It does look bad , especially if you've been carrying on with this woman while you and the wife were living together. Were You? You can't be imprisoned but I don't think a judge will
Look to kindly upon you and the girlfriend!

JudyKayTee · Apr 23, 2010, 06:42 AM

Originally Posted by Larken85

how can it be considered adultery if they are seperated. It doesn't have to be a legal seperation. That is like saying you cannot date anyone when your wife is dragging out the devorce. Thats crap.

Maybe legally its considered adultery, but if you've been seperated for any period of time, don't worry about it. It wont even look bad. Whatever its called its certainly not morally considered adultery and no one would frown upon you for seeing/sleeping with another woman at this point. Don't let the lawyer catch wind of it though, they may throw it in your face.

This is adultery - sex with a third party WHEN YOU ARE MARRIED (and you are married when you are separated) is in the eyes of the law adultery.

I cannot speak for the moral majority; apparently you think you can. Please give yoiur reasons for your statement that morally this is not adultery.

The Lawyer won't throw it in his face because it simply doesn't legally matter unless the wife chooses to use the adultery for "blackmail" purposes, to increase the size of her percentage.

As far as what is "crap" and what is not - you are out of line and, quite frankly, you are the last person who should be handing out advice on legality and morality in marriage and/or relationships.

Fr_Chuck · Apr 24, 2010, 06:46 PM

Since this is in the divorce section, not the law section, I guess opinions are allowed more. Please note that if posted in law, and if you wanted legal advice, not opinions,

1. it is on the books as illegal
2. no they do not actually enforce it. Most have been found unable to be upheld but the states never took them off the books, so they are there, but unable to enforce due to Federal cases. ( I know GA has a lot of them)
3. It is helpful in child custody cases, but often not even helpful in divorce and divorce settlement.

JudyKayTee · Apr 24, 2010, 07:43 PM

Absolutely - and I have learned through experience that opinion and discussion are allowed (and encouraged) on other than the legal boards.

Fr_Chuck · Apr 24, 2010, 07:47 PM

And I have learned when it is time to close one, before this thread turns to the dark side. The OP has received good answers