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obsessed123 · Jul 22, 2009, 12:34 AM

Hi ,

First of all let me tell you my age - 19. I am in relationship with my GF (she's 17) for more than 2 months. She is very cool person. But also , very powerful - she always gets what she wants! During these period I think all the time on her. When I am alone I can't get her out of my mind. Why is that? Beside this I have another problem. I am just not myself in the relationship. When I am with other people I am very communicative, laughing all the time, telling jokes... I do think that people like me! But with her , maybe I am the same, but I can't recognize it. So how to get her out of my mind?

Thanks!

Torrid13 · Jul 22, 2009, 12:41 AM

Thinking about someone your fond of for extended periods isn't obsessive. It's normal.

Now, if you were begging to be with her at all hours of the day, following her home, calling her excessively, not going out with friends so you can watch her, etc, then THAT'S obsessive.

I'm not sure why you want her out of your mind, though. Have you ever had a crush before, or a relationship? Like I said, it's normal to think regularly on someone you're fond of---don't try to ruin it! Enjoy it and think of why you are fond of her and going out with her.

obsessed123 · Jul 22, 2009, 12:51 AM

Ok , so I am not obsessed. From the thing You wrote I am doing nothing . I am just ready to go out with her rather than with my friends ( which is totally OK , I guess). Ok , maybe it is not so bad thinking on her , but why I am so nervous all the time? Is she feeling the same? Btw, we are very scared of telling out our feelings to each other. I haven't been so much into relationship so far. Also I think that SHE controls the relationship. You know.. I think that I am feeling like I am controlled..

obsessed123 · Jul 22, 2009, 12:53 AM

Sorry I forgot : Sometimes I think that she is bored when she is with me. But If she is bored she won't date me 2+ months, right?

classicrocker · Jul 22, 2009, 02:02 AM

So are you two still in dating mode or has it become more exclusive bf/gf? Im only a year older than you but one thing I have learned is that you need honest communication to have success. Talk to her. Be the one who opens up, and let her know how you feel. Hell if she's not diggin that your head over heals for her... will she ever dig it? Talk to her.

bobsuruncle · Jul 22, 2009, 06:05 PM

dude I know exactly how you feel! I'm 19 and my girlfriend is a few months older than me but always seems like she's in control. I'm always thinking about her drives me crazy, one thing that happens to me is that I start to picture her with other guys (I have no idea why) which starts to get me really paranoid lol. What I want to know is how to keep a cool level head as I always go over the top 'head over heals in love' talk which she doesn't respond to that well =/ I feel she has a very mature attititude where I may be slightly more immature as I'm fairly new to relationships too! Its about 3 months in and I'm starting to find myself in the relationship as I also felt as if I had 'lost' myself in it. I guess some advice is honest communication and keep everything in moderation! Just wanted to let you know your not alone in how you feel :)