I hear you Smoothy. That had to be upsetting that's what happens when we can only read - I go off course myself and take things wrong and vice versa.

It's really no different then some guys like blonds, some brunettes and we know they ALL love red heads :) (3 guesses what I am )

Anyway, I just breezed over the post but that's how I would see it. But it's a sensitive issue because society can be so cruel. Weight, height, ethnic background, you name it, someone has an unkind word for it, sad really.

But I am sure you were just stating your preferece.

Hope any hurt feelings, yours included heal. I've seen your post and I know you would never be cruel.

I am sure it's all resolved now.

I have been a big woman most of my married life. I did not have sex before marriage. When I married in 1972, I was not really big , but was about 25 pounds overweight and did not have terrific curves but I was considered attractive and I received compliments on how nice my clothes looked on me. My husband seemed to like the way I looked when we were dating and would order lady like portions of steak for me etc. . We had a great sex life . But he began wanting me to eat huge meals with him and ( gain a lot of weight). I thought he was jealous of other men looking at me and maybe was trying to turn them off to me if I was fat. By the time we were married for two years, I had gained 100 pounds. I felt gross but he seemed to enjoy every pound of me. I did not enjoy sex as much because I was ashamed of my body. I went on a diet and lost 40 pounds before getting pregnant. He seemed angry with me as I lost the weight ( pre-pregnancy ). I was careful what I ate while pregnant ( only lean proteins, veggies , fruits, skim milk ) and only gained 10 pounds. But The bigger I got with child the more sex he wanted. After the baby was born, I came home from the hospital 52 pounds lighter, from the baby, water weight , etc. My husband began bringing me chocolates by the boxes, pizzas, any and everything fattening. I gained all that weight back and more. The bigger I got the more he wanted to make love to me. One day , I decided to lose the weight and I got down to my normal weight. My husband was so furious that he started cheating on me with a fat woman. I got so nervous and frustrated that I began overeating. I gained the weight back and he called it quits with the other woman. We moved to another state. He also developed health problems which made him impotent about 15 years ago. I have tried many times to lose weight and once the results start showing up, he will go to the computer and download sites with super obese women. I think my husband must think that sex with big women is great or he is just what they call a chubby chaser. LOL . I do not want to be fat and after seeing all that gross stuff he enjoys looking at... I am sticking to my diet . If he does not like me for the way that I would be comfortable weighing in at... TOUGH.

Good points. I'm not turned on by guys. Doesn't make me a homophobe. I'm not turned on by uber-skinny waifs that think a rice cake and mineral water is a meal and a half. I've dated, as I've already said, women who were generally "fit", active, most not heavier.

Hell, I don't even fit my wife's "perfect man" profile. I'm generally fit, physically active, and reasonably funny and smart enough it seems to keep her around and faithful, but I'm not 6ft 3in or taller, I'm not latin or dark skinned, I have no accent or super deep bass voice, and I don't play pro football. Still... she seems to like me well enough.

But you shouldn't be receiving pm's concerning a post that honestly asks about primal preferences. Diff strokes for diff folks. And thank God for that.

I had no problem with the PM, it was both quite genuine and quite nice, I wish more people were as nice about things, I felt if they viewed it as they did then maybe others might have as well, And I didn't want them having the wrong idea.


To me its hard to find good friends. Finding acquaintances is easy, dates are easier (yeah I'm happily married and don't fool around but it would be easy to find is my meaning). But the type of friends you can trust and know will be there is what I refer to as friends.

Yeah I know people that don't associate with people that aren't just like they are. I'm not them.

And like I said... some of my best friends have been larger people. Not just people I know, but true actual friends.

I think there is an extreme to either case. I wouldn't think having sex with a 500lb women would be arousing and then again I can't see a 100lb women sexual attractive in the least. As for plus sized women I actually think they are beautiful espically in their 40's while most slender women in their 40's tend to wrinkle and sag. I am a full sized lady in my 20s by today's standards. I am not extremely obese but I am larger than most of my "skinny" friends. My jeans are in the double digits and "they dont make that in my size" happens to me but as for a difference in sexual appeal I find none. I have no problems meeting men and a lot of times I am complimented on being beautiful and intelligent even though I am not in the running for any runway model position. BUt I assure you one thing I love sex and not because I do not get it enough because I like it. As for smoothie... you sound hard up for anything you can get ahold of and I doubt you should be judging anyone at 220. I am 5'10 and not even close to that.

Like I said whatever floats your boat. I'd rather have a boyfriend that was shorter, thinner and not as good looking as what most girls go after. That doesn't mean I find other guys repulsive, just maybe not my type. Like Allheart said some people even have specific hair color they want their 'ideal' to have.

Keep in mind 220 for a man is far different than 220 for a woman. Men carry far more of their weight in upper body mussel mass, wile others don't . Am I hard up? Not by a long shot. My wife is a perfect size zero. Not an emaciated waif. Body type means everything when you start discussing absolute numbers.

If I was the fooling around type I could have quite a few on the side at any given time. I have enough women of all sizes making their interest known. But like I said, I have a good wife and I don't fool around. Its as much a matter of respect for her as it is for doing what's right.

So I prefer slimmer women, its what turns me on. Would you fault a woman who only considers men over 6'5" to date, or guys with 6 digit incomes... or guys who are say, exceptionally well endowed (trying to keep it clean here).

Or how about that shorter rotund fellow that always seems to be setting alone. I've known some rather large women express their personal tastes that are not that different than my own in certain ways. And more than a few in fact.

My basic point being there is a huge difference between being one of those people that ridicule larger people (and usually anyone else that's different from them) and being someone that just isn't attracted by it.

Everyone has their preferences as to body type, hair color, eye color etc. And they have their right to it. Even before you toss personality into the mix everyone can't be all things to all people.

Also Smoothy
I am only 120 pounds I wouldn't want to be with someone that big cause a 200+ (maybe even less?) pound guy is going to crush me cause I have shortness of breath so you have to factor in what is preferable to you according to many things besides oh he is too fat, too short, too skinny, too ugly, too poor.

I promise you... a 230 lb man who is fit is not going to crush you. As smoothy stated, that's what upper body strength is for, and guys are absolutely proportioned differently than woman.

I have a wide build, broad shoulders, fit, but I can't buy a suitcoat off the rack at most big box stores. The waist and hips are fine but the shoulders aren't big enough and the arm width is way to small.

Trust me... a fit guy at 230 isn't going to crush you any more than a fit guy at 180 unless he passes out or is a lazy slob in bed. My partner is 138, a previous partner was 120's, and they never turned blue in the face when I was on top. Again, that's what shoulder and arm strength is for.

That and cutting down trees and lifting big rocks. *grunt* *grunt* *grunt* ;)

I am married to a nice figured woman whom I love very much, I have everything I want with her. That being said, if I ever was to get thrown back into the dateing pool, size would not be an issue. I would much rather hook up with a 300 pound woman with a good sense of humor and a bubbly personality than some 120 pound twit with the "my dont stink attitude". The body is simply a tool that carries around the person inside. Have you seen these models lately... fake noses, fake boobs. Heck... fake everything... Naw... I will take a good, down to earth woman any day... Any size!
Mike

First of all.. BAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA to the comment "I have heard that sex with bigger women is better, because they dont get it as often, and when they do.....hold on and enjoy the ride" From 2 personal.

That's the stupidest thing I've EVER HEARD. Im a big girl, size 14 and my boyfriend loves every curve on my body. He NEVER leaves me alone.. is always touching me in public (which gets quite annoying) and tell me that he loves the attention I get from other men.

We have an awesome sexlife... do it twice a day almost every day of the week. And he's a lot smaller than I am. I think people that think like that are idiots, who said the big girls don't get it as often as skinny girls? To be honest, I like woman, and skinny women under size 10 do not turn me on what so ever.. Woman were meant to have curves.. so the more cushion for the pushing the better I say ;)

What's wrong with being big? Doesn't mean were less flexible or that the sex is worse.. I can get my feet over my head!. and yes I'm a size 14... I am also very healthy and love experimenting. My bfs last girlfriend as he told me.. was a deadroot and was boring... and she was a size 6.

So its got nothing to do with size... it's the way you work BABY!

Size 14 is not that big. That is only 34 waist--while it is not petite or small it is NOT BIG.
Bigger women, I would say, start more like size 18 OR 20 on up
I do agree that just because bigger women are bigger doesn't mean "they don't get it as often'' I know most bigger women have to be because they always seem to have a boyfriend no matter what, so they MUST be doing something right.
Personally I like being around a size 8 and am trying to get back to that.

That's got to be the stupidest thing I have ever heard "bigger women don't get it as often" lol. I am a smaller guy and I personally prefer larger women. I find them dead sexy, and when they know that you love every part of them, that seems to boost their confidence. My current girlfriend has been the best sex I have ever had, and I have had my share of skinny little twigs. But I love the way a larger woman feels. They know how to make things fun and interesting. I have had skinny women almost put me to sleep lol. It just depends onwhat you really are into and what your not, I just prefer larger women as they have curves and they are well... sexy. Can't help it. To all the BBWs here live it up!

Yea. I don't necessarily agree with this comment. I think it depends on the individual, on both individuals.

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