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    Cgirl's Avatar
    Cgirl Posts: 287, Reputation: 38
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    #1

    Apr 12, 2006, 08:50 AM
    Mother passed/now feel like she may be watching over me
    Okay everyone, this is going to be a really long post, so get ready. When I was 12 yr.'s old my mother passed away from a brain aneurism. I did not grieve at all afterwards, I guess mainly because I wanted to shut it out of mind at the time (which I now know is normal, especially at the age).

    I need to give you a little history of my childhood before I continue, so bare with me. When I was 2 my mother was holding me in her lap and suddenly had a terrible headache and called my grandparents (her parents) to tell them something was not right, so they in turn called 911 (or equivilancy at the time) and when the parametics arrived, she was in a coma state and I was laying next to her on the bed crying and upset. She had apparently suffered from a brain aneurism in her brainstem, and was in a coma for 6months following this episode. She and my dad were both only 23 at the time. When she came out of the coma she was paralyzed from the neck down with a slight ability to use her right arm. Her tongue was paralyzed as well. Growing up this was very hard for me to understand. My dad raised me and my grandpa (her father) took care of her. I saw her almost every weekend, and holidays. I used to be somewhat envious of my friends that had what I thought of as “normal mommy’s” as I felt like she was not really a mother to me at the time, because she could not take care of me due to her physical inability to. I now have some guilt because of this, I just wish I would have asked her all of things that I now wonder about her, and now especially raising my son, I regret not being closer to her. My Dad later divorced her and got re-married.

    So, going back to when I was 12, she had another brain aneurism and passed away. When I first found out, I was a wreck. My grandma had called me over the ph. To tell me what happened (which I now feel she should not have done over the phone. For a long time, like I said I didn’t grieve. I was in denial. I just wanted to not think about it and I would get angry when people kept trying to ask me how I felt. When I was about 16 it finally hit me, and it hit me hard. I went through a really tough time at this age, and my step-mom and I didn’t get along at all. I think that she was somewhat jealous of me and my fathers relationship. Now we get along pretty good.

    I guess now I can get to my question. I am now 27 years old, married with a son and I swear that sometimes I can feel her in the room with me. When my son was an infant, I would be rocking him in his room and I would feel like someone was behind me, and my son would be looking behind me at something. I guess what I am wondering is, do any of you believe that having my son made my mom’s spirit come around? I don't know, I somewhat believe in this sort of thing, but I have never a presence before until I had a son. Do you think that it is her there with us or just my imagination or wishful thinking. I am especially lately having a hard time with my mothers death because now I have a son and I can’t imagine how she must have felt watching her daughter growing up under someone else's care. Plus, there is so many things I want to ask her and can’t like, how old was I when I first did this or that, or just things I will never be able to tell her. (my Dad doesn’t remember things from that long ago, or he has blocked them out of his mind.) What does everyone think?
    Cgirl's Avatar
    Cgirl Posts: 287, Reputation: 38
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    #2

    Apr 12, 2006, 09:05 AM
    I forgot to mention to that a couple of times we have come home on a winter day and the furnace would be turned up as high as it would go. It would be so hot in the house that the windows would be steaming. And both of us had not touched the thermostat. Weird huh?
    Cgirl's Avatar
    Cgirl Posts: 287, Reputation: 38
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    #3

    Apr 12, 2006, 11:04 AM
    Is anybody... out there? :)
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #4

    Apr 12, 2006, 11:34 AM
    Hello, of course everyone on here answers in their spare time, so many have full time day jobs, or kids and other life things so we may not answer at times for a day or two, and some only answer perhaps once a week or so, I am sure you will be getting a variety of answers over the next week.

    I am never sure how to combine these happenings and christianity, but yes I have had many experiences where there is someone or thing that has an influence. Of course I have been in a room where things actually flew off the desk and also off the fireplace mantel, so things moving is not really a surprice. I don't know what to call it, spirits, ghosts, angels or what, but yes there can be those feelings

    I think that you loved your mother and she loved you greatly. I also believe that no matter if that is her, or an angel or what ever it will never take away the feelings you have for your mother. And as long as you tell your children about her and they thiers, her memory and in some ways part of her lives on with us forever.
    phillysteakandcheese's Avatar
    phillysteakandcheese Posts: 973, Reputation: 356
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    #5

    Apr 12, 2006, 11:59 AM
    I am sure that if you were to look hard enough, you would find a rational explanation - like maybe someone bumped the thermostat or maybe its' sensor isn't working right - However... I believe that your perception is correct.

    Your Mom is watching over you and her grandchild. :)
    Stormy69's Avatar
    Stormy69 Posts: 290, Reputation: 98
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    #6

    Apr 26, 2006, 11:05 PM
    Have you thought about consulting a psychic to come to your home?
    Krs's Avatar
    Krs Posts: 2,906, Reputation: 320
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    #7

    Apr 27, 2006, 12:46 AM
    Hi CGirl,

    Im sorry to hear such a story, you went through a lot at a very young age.

    I truly believe that your mum is present with you, in your heart, soul and spirit.
    I know what it means to lose a parent. I lost my dad only 2 year ago. He died of terminal cancer. It was a very sudden, and none of us were expecting it.
    I had left home when I was 19 to move to another country, stayed there 6 years and when I decided to go back home to spend quality time with my parents, 1 month after my arrival we were all given this horrific news about my dad. I was always close to my dad, I was his baby girl, we got on light a house on fire. And to hear that he was terminally is was heart breaking and to also see him detriorate the way I did was just too much to handle but I had to be strong for him and mum and my younger brother.

    Till this day I miss him very much.
    But I feel he is present, near me, as you explained about your mum.

    I think believing they are with us helps us get through each day better.

    So if you believe she is with you in spirit hold that thought with you every day.
    Cgirl's Avatar
    Cgirl Posts: 287, Reputation: 38
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    #8

    May 1, 2006, 07:25 AM
    Thank you! I am sorry to hear about your loss, thanks for the kind words!
    JoeCanada76's Avatar
    JoeCanada76 Posts: 6,669, Reputation: 1707
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    #9

    May 1, 2006, 07:53 AM
    I am here. I am here. I do believe that young children and babies can sense spirits that are there when many times an adult can not. I do believe that if you feel your moms presence with you then I am sure that she is there watching over you and her grandchild. I do not necessarily think having a baby would make her come around more but maybe you became more aware of it with being a mother comes greater sensitivity to feelings and things around you.

    Joe
    Cgirl's Avatar
    Cgirl Posts: 287, Reputation: 38
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    #10

    May 1, 2006, 07:57 AM
    Thanks Joe, I agree, I think children are more "in tune" with things that adults are to busy to pay attention to.
    milliec's Avatar
    milliec Posts: 262, Reputation: 55
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    #11

    May 2, 2006, 12:06 AM
    I just find your life story so painful.
    I believe the soul is immortal, and that young infants (and I've heard that animals too) are sensitive to things we don't know to exist.
    I guess your mother is there, to enjoy her grandchild AND you motherhood.
    Besides, now, as a mother, you can relate to her pain and accept her in a way you couldn't when you were a little girl in need of her mom, and this is so important to her, and to you as well.
    Enjoy your life, your family, your motherhood, and, her caring presence.
    Millie:)
    Cgirl's Avatar
    Cgirl Posts: 287, Reputation: 38
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    #12

    May 2, 2006, 07:33 AM
    Thank you everyone for your nice thoughts on this thread, I appreciate it! I know she is out there somewhere watching out for me in her own way. I guess the hardest part is just knowing I will never know about certain things in my childhood that I can't remember, and I have no one to ask. My Dad can remember some stuff, but some things, only a mother could know. I just hope that I am going to be around for a long time to come so I can watch my beautiful son grow up and be able to tell him all about his baby years, and tell my grandchildren about their father too (Wow, that better be a long way off though-my son's only 14 months ;))
    milliec's Avatar
    milliec Posts: 262, Reputation: 55
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    #13

    May 2, 2006, 09:09 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Cgirl
    I guess the hardest part is just knowing I will never know about certain things in my childhood that I can't remember, and I have no one to ask. My Dad can remember some stuff, but some things, only a mother could know. I just hope that I am going to be around for a long time to come so I can watch my beautiful son grow up and be able to tell him all about his baby years, and tell my grandchildren about their father too (Wow, that better be a long way off though-my son's only 14 months ;))

    I know how it is, since now, as a grandmother, my kids listen with much interest when I tell them about their early days.
    I advised them to do something I'm sorry not to have done: to write nice/ funny/ important things - with time, and with more kids, we tend to mix up things or not remember "at what age..?"
    I wish you a long, happy and healthy life with all dear to you
    Millie:)
    Cgirl's Avatar
    Cgirl Posts: 287, Reputation: 38
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    #14

    May 2, 2006, 09:42 AM
    Thanks millie! I appreciate your kind words!
    Boe's Avatar
    Boe Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #15

    Mar 1, 2007, 08:01 AM
    Set a video Camera On a peace of furniture And Leave for an hour and review the footage to tell if it is truly your mom or you can set in a room with a tape recorder and ask questions you won't hear any thing until you listen to what is on it and try write a letter to her on a mirror and if there is a response it will be written as if someone was on the other of it writing to you so naturally it will be written backwards:eek:.

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