Okay, this is kind of a detailed question, so bare with me please! I work in a Gastroenterology Clinic with 14 Dr.'s and over 100 employees, and of all of us there is only 15 men that work there, and 14 are the Dr's and the other is the I.T. guy. The rest of us are women, and nothing against that, accept only to say that it is hard to work in an environment of ONLY women. I am a very hard worker, I am in nursing and I work in the Endoscopy lab which is high stress and busy busy busy. One of my co-workers is very hard to work with, but has been there much longer then me, 9 years longer in fact. We work together on a daily basis, and tend to step on each others feet. I am the type of person, when I see when something needs to be done, I just do it, no questions asked, because that is the teamwork environment we are in. My co-worker acts like I am constantly taking all of her work, and gets all huffy and mad when I perform a task that apparently she was going to do, like I am a mind reader or something. She is a BIG complainer and cannot take anybody elses critisism. I feel like I am constantly having to apologize for just doing my job, and I have to walk on eggshells around her. I notice that I am not the only one either. However, I have to deal with her and learn to get along. I am not a confrontational person, but she really knows how to get under my skin. She can dish it out and can't take it. Does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this type of personality? Or is it something that I can change about myself? Any help is appreciated!

Fr_Chuck

Do your job, if you are doing jobs that are the other workers to do, let them do thier own work. In the end, you have to just do your job, and ignoe people you don't like, you will find those types of people on every job

AW805

First I have to say, I just hate when someone says it's difficult working with only women. Its equally as hard working with men.

With that many employees there is always going to be problems. That's just the way it is. I'm not sure why you would take on someone else's work load with asking first. Part of being a teamplayer means asking you co-worker if there is something you can help them with once you finished your tasks. If you take a co-workers work without asking it makes it appear as though you're trying to take over their job or show them up.

If there are tasks that you both share and you are doing the majority of the work and she's making it appear as if she was going to do it then I would talk to her and put together a more defined game plan for the day. See what works for the both of you. After all, you do have to work together.

Cgirl

I don't think you get what I am saying AT ALL here. FIrst of all we both have the same exact job, and I am not doing her job for her, I am simply seeing that something needs to be done, and not standing around waiting for someone else to do it. I don't have time for that. I work in a very busy place, we do about 50 procedures in an 8 hour period. I am not going to sit around while she is busy flapping her gums to wait and see if she is going to do something and then it not get done. I am simply asking how do deal with someone that ALWAYS complains and tries to pull me into her crap. As for working with only women, I don't have a problem with it, or I wouldn't do it, I am just saying it would be nice to have a mixture. Everyone knows that when there is all one sex working together, there tends to be high drama and high emotions AND a lot of competition amongst each other. My work is a perfect example of this. As far as doing jobs that the others are supposed to do, we are both supposed to do it, and I am not about to get in trouble sitting around doing nothing. Anyways, this doesn't really matter now because she has since been moved to another area, apparently I wasn't the only one getting annoyed by her. I know that every job has people that are hard to work with, I was just asking for advice on how to deal with it, but have learned to just do my job and mind my own business, and people will notice that she is not doing hers, and they did.

Mom of 2

You need to do what you need to do for you. I can totally see what you are saying. Have you tried sitting down to talk with her, explaining that it is not your intent to step on her toes? Communication is the key. I had a similar situaton where I work as a waitress at night. A girl who worked there complained all the time that people were not doing their job and that she was tired of picking up the slack of the others. If the people did do their job, then she would complain that it was never done good enough. I tried talking to her, but she just continued to make it sound like she was the victim. I told her to stop enabling the other workers and to concentrate on just doing her job, but she always had an excuse for why she could not do that. My experience is similar, but not exact. At any rate, she had a nervous breakdown. When she left, the drama was all over and people were to found to be doing their jobs just fine. If you simply tell her in a nonthreatening way, "I'm going to go and do such and such" this tells her that you are TRYING to communicate with her. It is also telling her, "Listen, we are at work right now, there is work to be done and we need to do it now. We don't have time to talk." Complaining about a problem and not going to the source of the problem to find a solution is called passive aggressive. Don't fall victim to this. I totally understand that when things need to get done, they need to get done, but you as a coworker have the right to tell her, "Listen, I really need for you to help me with this", or "Can you do this while I do that?" Maybe approaching it that way will show her that you really do need her help. Also, if she tries to get you in trouble, what in the heck did you do wrong? If something does not get done, explain the ENTIRE situation to your superiors and let them know that you have been trying to work with her. What I would NOT do would be to speak with management without speaking with her first. You will be viewed as a tattler who cannot solve their own problems. After you speak with her and things still don't work, then go to management. Tell them that you take pride in your work, that you recognize what needs to get done, that you have tried to work as a team player but you are having difficulty with this person. Ask them to assist you in finding a solution to the problem. Don't go in there with the idea of getting her in trouble. That will backfire on you. Hope this helps!!!!

Mom of 2

I don't know what my eyes were doing, but I totally did not read the last few sentences of your post. SORRY!!! If I had, I would have discovered that your problem was solved. Thank goodness that you no longer have to work with that situation. However, I feel sorry for that person, as most likely, she was just moved but did not see or learn from what she did wrong. I also feel sorry for the people that she currently works for, unless she was moved on somewhere else!!! My grandma always gave me the same advice; do your job and do it well. Don't worry about the other people being a threat to you because they will be found out eventually.