[Allheart]

Hi everyone

This is my little girl Kara. She will be 9 in August. I had a boy, Flakey, who passed away several years ago, and Ms. Princess has adjusted nicely. She LOVED her brother.

Now here’s the thing. Hubby wishes for us to get Ms. Kara a playmate. We both do work and little Ms. Muffin is home alone until we get home. But weekends we all are always together. I think Missy catches up on her sleep during the week as on the weekend she doesn’t sleep much at all. (I’m up very early and she is always afraid she will miss something)

Here’s the part that concerns me. Kara, is not disinterested in other dogs, she does not like them. Not even a little. She growled at a little puppy that was just sitting looking at her. Another time I was holding her, and someone was showing me their little puppy and she made a little snap gesture. Now this is a dog that does not bark at all and never grows at all. Unless she is playing with her little dolly. My mother-in-law swears she doesn’t know how to bark 

I do know that hubby and I can spend the time to acquaint the new dog with her as we don’t have any “two foot” children.

Another concern is Kara has both her little knees out and has torn her ACL once. I never want to see her in that pain again. Niether does her Daddy. We have laid carpet everywhere, even the kitchen, so Miss muphet doesn’t reinjure herself.

I’m concerned the new little one will rip and run and Kara hurting herself again. We are going to look at the foster babies, but I am so leary of that. I am so afraid to bring in a semi adult dog, when no one really knows its complete background, and if the foster baby bites Kara or vice versa. I would be devastated. So we are leaning towards a new puppy.

Are we doing wrong by Ms. Kara, getting her a playmate, when she appears to be very happy and is happiest when on Mommies lap. Her Daddy thinks she needs a playmate, but Mommy will be doing all the puppy work . Oh but that kind of work is a work of love.

I just want to do right by Princess Kara.

I value and appreciate your advice. You folks on this forum are simply the best.

Thank you,
Allheart.

[shygrneyzs]

Hi Allheart. That is a tough question but here are my thoughts. An older dog like Kara, whose best pal and brother passed away, would not take kindly to another animal in the house. Especially a puppy. Too much drama for her, too much activity and strain for her. If you could find an older dog who could acclimate into your home? But the dog would have to have Kara's seal of approval, since, during the day, the dogs would be home by themselves and you could not see what goes on. You would hate it if something happened to Kara.

So I lean towards no to the playmate. Unless you found a dog that she did interact well with before entering that dog into the household.

Hugs to you and your warm heart.

[Allheart]

Oh Shy thank you so much.

Shy, is that why baby girl doesn't like other dogs, because she loved her brother and that it? It has to be about 3 or 4 years ago Flakey passed. ( The memory is a sad haze , I miss the little feller).

But she adjusted surprisingly well for how much they both loved each other. Now when it was Flakey and Tina Marie (my other baby in doggie heaven). Flakey did not adjust, he was looking all over for Tina, and went outside and stood where she normally tinkled and just start to howl. It broke our hearts. Even worse, Ms. Tina was terrible to him. But he didn't care, he played big brother all the way.

So that's when we got Ms, Kara, weighing in at 1 pound. Flakey, was 10 years old at the time, and Ms. Kara made him feel young at heart and really ran him pretty good. They had five wonderful years together.

Her Daddy says she looks sad when we are leaving. It is a hard one Shy, but I think like you. Why disturb the princesses palace?

Shy, a million thanks.

[Alty]

Oh Allheart, bless your heart, I knew you were an animal lover.

When my husband and I first got married we lived in the city for one year in a rental property that his sister owned. Our friends dog had puppies and we just had to have one, unfortunately my sister-in-law would not allow us to bring our fur baby into the house. My parents agreed to take care of our new child until we had a place of our own, the only problem, our poodle. At the time our poodle was 13 years old and very set in his ways. He weighed 5 pounds soaking wet and had a wonderful personality, but there were certain things that he could not tolerate, little kids and other dogs. My parents said that they would find a way to make it work, my mother was at home all day and she would make sure that everything was okay. By the way, our fur baby (Indy) is a black lab cross, at 12 weeks of age he was already bigger than Silver (our poodle).

Anyway, long story short, the first few weeks were a bit rocky, it took both dogs time to adjust to each other and at first our poodle didn't understand why he had to put up with this rambunctious puppy, then one day my mom found both of them sleeping together on the back landing, laying in a ray of sunshine. Until the day we finally got to take our Indy home, Silver was the dominant doggy (even though our Indy was fully grown and Silver could walk under him without touching his belly). We visited my parents for dinner every Sunday and Indy and Silver were always thrilled to see each other. Silver passed on at the ripe old age of 18, my mother swears that Indy kept him young.

If you really want to do this, try fostering an older dog (4 years plus) and see how it goes. I would wait until you take holidays from work, that way you can be around to help both dogs adjust. It might take some time, but I think that eventually your princess will be willing to share the palace, and be a happier pup because of it.

Oh, just so you know. Indy is now 13 years old and we also have a 7 year old Border Collie, they are best friends.

[Allheart]

Alt - thank you so much.

You sharing your story brings back great memories when we brough Tina Marie home and then later Kara. Flakey, God bless his soul what he endured. But he just loved them.
I always say he helped raise them because when they would start to get into things, he would bark at them. It was too funny. Neither one of them were chewers and so well behaved. Thank you Flakey :).

Your babies sound so beautiful. Don't they just make your heart smile :).

Oh when a new one comes home. It's Neurotic Mommy Allheart time. With Kara,
I took over a week off and raised her in play pens in every room for her nap time. She was up every four hours and then nap time Mommy.

My brother in law who has 3 two foot children :) came over and said what's wrong with you? I said I'm exhausted, do you know what it's like raising a puppy LOL. Poor guy has 3 boys under his feet.

I barely slept and I remember trying to find time to go to the bathroom myself. I think if she didn't see me by the playpen, she was having none of it.

Hugs to you and you and Shy helped tremendously. Promise to let you both know
What we do.

I am so sorry about Silver - but we always remember how much we loved them and all the love they gave us.

A million thanks to you as well :)

[Alty]

Oh Allheart, I knew we were kindred spirits.

Indy was my first fur baby as a grown up, the first living breathing creature for which I was solely responsible, we love him so much, it scares me that he's already 13, I know that I have less time left than I've had.

When my son was born Indy was 4 years old, he was amazed at this tiny two legged animal that we brought home. He slept under the crib for 6 months and every time Jared (my son) cried he'd come and get me. He always had the cutest look on his face, it was like he was saying "Mommy, that bald puppy you brought home is complaining again, do what you do to make him happy or I'll be forced to handle it." Jared learned to walk by holding on to Indy's back, Indy licked Boo Boo's, cuddled with Jared when he was sick. Sat patiently beside him when he was upset and never so much as growled at him, even when he got his tail pulled. They are still best buddies. My kids have no idea what life is like without dogs, I think that they believe that everyone has fur brothers. They do bring so much joy to our lives and ask for very little in return.

Silver has been gone for 9 years now, we were forced to put him down when I was 6 months pregnant with Jared. Silver could no longer see, hear or walk, I truly believe he hung on to life for us, but we knew that it was time to end his misery. My mother held him while they gave him the injection. She says that the look he gave her right before he breathed his last breath, spoke volumes. "Thank you for ending my pain, thank you for loving me enough to let me go."

Sorry that I went of on a tangent, you know me, can't help telling a story.

[shygrneyzs]

Altenweg's sharing gives one encouragement! Thank you so much. I like the idea of introducing another animal when you both are home, giving praise and attention and encouragement. Our pets are our family. I have yet to find a replacement for my son, Brandon's dog.

Whatever you choose, I am sure it will be well thought out. You are not one to jump in without considering all the possibilties. Best to you and to Kara too!

[Allheart]

Oh you both have lifted my spirtis and I thank you so for listening and for both of your incredible advice.

And Shy - Curly is my favorite. Shy you are so right. Baby Kara comes first. I honestly think it may not be the best idea as she is one little happy baby now, who gets way too many treats from her Daddy. I don't think ever gave her one treat since I had baby girl (such a mean Mommy) that's because she tilts her little head and Daddy runs to the treat closet. Poor little girl has some love handles thanks to Daddy, but I did have him cut it down (although the two of them act very sneaky after dinner). Shy thanks again.

Altenweg - I loved what you shared about Indy and Silver. Don't worry about Indy's age, you just love him every minute like you do. Way too funny "the little bald puppy" how precoius is that. They do sense our emotions don't they. Oh Alt, I love what you said, Thank you for ending my pain and loving me enough to let me go. So very true.

Love you guys bunches!

Thanks guys so much!!

[shygrneyzs]

Have to chuckle when you talk about how your husband passes out the treats to Kara. When Rosie was still alive she knew right where the treats were held and was not too proud to ask, beg, look pitiful - whatever it took. Lol. Brandon would point to the cupboard and then point to Rosie. I was totally ganged up on. A nice memory.

[Allheart]

Shy - that is a very nice memory.

OMG I love your signature! Curly was my Dad's favorite as well.

I can actually eat my meal wth Kara on my lap ( I know I shouldn't but I do) and she just falls off to sleep, cause she knows mean Mommy won't give me a crumb. Plus she's exhausted from "helping" me in the kitchen. She stays planted at my feet just hoping I get clumsy and drop a morsel or two.

But I can just tell which foods Hubby slips her. I can tell just by the way she wizzes around the kitchen and then plants her self right by Daddy's chair.

Daddy's little girl I tell you.

[nicki143]

Hi Allheart
We had a dog a few years back but sadly he passed away my daughter loved him loads he would follow her everywhere and sleep on her bed which I did not allow she waited till I was a sleep and then let him in
I would not have another dog due to him passing my daughter was devistated and I do not think I could put her through that pain again

[nicki143]

Oh and kara is beautiful

[shygrneyzs]

When my oldest son got his very own dog, he was 12 years old. We got him a redbone puppy. What a sweetheart he was. Ben named him Rusty. Good natured, friendly, easy to train. He had that deep bawl. Just a nice dog. Had him for about a year and a half when my husband decided Rusty needed to go so HE could get some lame excuse for a coon hound - a grand de bleu gascon from North Carolina. Tore Ben's heart. In fact my husband never told Ben what he was going to do - he did it when Ben went to school. What a dirty thing to do to anyone. Ben never wanted anything to do with dogs after that, until we got Rosie. Rosie healed his heart, protected Brandon, and just took care of business.

[Allheart]

Oh and kara is beautiful

Why thank you my good friend Nicki who I love dearly. My "daughter" Kara is a beauty isn't she, and such a good girl.

Thank you Nicki

Um Shy and Alten... what's a matter doggie got your tongue?? Neither of my other very good friends said how beautiful my little one was... hmmmmmmm Come on... cough it out :)

( Oh heavens, would I be one of those Mommies with a two foot child... I would hope not.. buuuut think I might have that tendency... as long as they were good... and of course they would be :)

Love you guys

[shygrneyzs]

My apologies - Kara is a cutie! I love her expression on that picture. She looks well loved. Isn't it amazing the unconditional love an pet can give us? They listen when we are blue, just like they understand it all. And who knows? Maybe they do.

Hugssssssss.

[Alty]

Of course Kara is adorable, that goes without saying, we thought you knew that. Okay, okay, I meant to say it and I didn't, but better late than never right?:o

[Allheart]

I'm sorry Alt and Shy.. I was being very naughty and silly :):)

Well, on the way home we discussed, puppy and a shelter.

Daddy Allheart seems to think puppy because then Kara can call the shots...

I'd like to see how Ms. Muphet would do with an adotped baby though.

But mostly, I think the Princess would like to remain top dog and only dog.

You guys are the worlds best :).

And I love you dearly.

[Alty]

Our dogs each choose a child to sit by and the switch every night, that way it's equal. Indy gained 15 pounds when Jared started eating solid food, but I'm one of the few mothers out there that didn't have to constantly clean the floor even though there was a new eater in it.

Our second fur baby Jasper (the 7 year old Border collie) was a shelter rescue. We adopted him when he was 4 months old.

That poor little guy had been through a lifetime of pain and suffering at the age of 4 months, at first my husband didn't want to get him, he didn't think the little fellow would ever be completely okay and we had 3 year old Jared and a baby on the way to think about. I insisted that I could nurture this little guy into a trusting loving dog, I knew in my heart that all he needed was love and a gentle hand, some patience and the room to grow and he would blossom.

My husband relented and Jasper came home with us. For the first few weeks he would leave the room every time we entered it, he would tuck his tail in if we a laughed, it was too high pitched and he thought we were yelling. He was skin and bones and a tangle of nerves. After 3 weeks of trying to connect with this pup I was beginning to think that my husband was right, maybe it was too late to make him see that people were good.

I didn't give up and ended up with a volunteer for the "Rescue Jasper" program, Indy. After Indy stepped in we had a new puppy on our hands. The transformation within a few weeks was amazing. They are best buds, I know it will hurt Jasper terribly when Indy goes to the Rainbow Bridge, but he now loves us humans too and we'll help get him through it like I'm sure he'll help us.

Now he's my Piss and Vinegar dog who loves to play, loves the kids and would really like for me to take one of the bunnies out of the cage and turn my back for just a minute. "It's not going to happen Jasper, they're my fur babies too."

If you want to experience unconditional love then look into the eyes of a dog.

[N0help4u]

I think if you want to get another dog it shouldn't be a puppy but it should be a
Male between 3 and 7 same breed as your other that would sort of remind Kara of Flakey.
When my Choux was older and sick it really perked up her spirits and got her playful when I got another dog a bit younger.
It would be best to make sure they can get along when you go looking rather than bringing
It home "Kara here is your new buddy" and expecting her to take to him. So I suggest take Kara and let her pick one out.

[Allheart]

Hi everyone,

Just to give an update. We did call about a 5 year old male that was available. The owner was very honest and described the males behaviour. Oh I am so familiar with her story.
Seems her little guy has aggressive issues (doesn't like to be picked up and such), and hubby and I are well versed with this type of baby. The lady doesn't want to give him up but her hubby does. I gave her some tips of things that we did with our "special needs" guy and she things hubby is going to change his mind. She has two daughters that were crying there eyes out. She was a beautiful hearted lady and I think with a lot of love and patience they should be okay.

I did tell her her little guy and my little girl may not be the best match. I think we are going to leave our little angel just the way it is.

See this is how she lays when Mommy is busy. I just snapped the picture of her as I was ironing. I don't think she looks sad?? She is enjoying the warm sunshine by the door there and waiting for me to get done. Right?. I hope so. You don't think she looks sad... do you?

Thank you all so much for all of your advice and for being there.