Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    CommonSense2007's Avatar
    CommonSense2007 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jul 22, 2007, 06:36 PM
    People Ask Me When My Baby is Due, But I'm not Pregnant
    Okay, I have a big stomach and strangers come up to me and ask when my baby is due. I think it is very presumptuous to think a woman is pregnant just because her belly is big. So I tell the truth and say I'M NOT PREGNANT. And the stranger apologizes and looks stupid and embarrassed. But, until I lose this weight or find out what's wrong with me, what can I tell people or at least let me say right now, NEVER ask a woman when she's due if you don't personally know her. It can be quite humiliating and to me if a person is pregnant it's their business and why does it matter when you're due?:(
    bekah876's Avatar
    bekah876 Posts: 445, Reputation: 38
    Full Member
     
    #2

    Jul 22, 2007, 06:42 PM
    Strangers should just keep their mouths shut! I have a personal rule where I NEVER assume someone is pregnant even if they look to be 9 months along.
    You could always come up with a strange story that would make the stranger feel bad; however, I am sure they feel bad when you tell them you aren't pregnant.
    Sorry you have to deal with this. There is no magic answer to make stupid people stop doing stupid things. I wish there were!
    GlindaofOz's Avatar
    GlindaofOz Posts: 2,334, Reputation: 354
    Ultra Member
     
    #3

    Jul 22, 2007, 06:49 PM
    What rude people! I heard a comedian who once said that you should never presume a woman is pregnant unless you see the baby coming out of her.

    Kirstie Alley had a show on HBO called Fat Actress and in one of her episodes she said strangers kept asking her if she was pregnant just because she was heavy - so then they show her going into a restaurant and the valet asks her and she goes "uh, about 5 months" and just walks away.

    I guess what I'm trying to say is that you can't change people only how you react to them.
    stonewilder's Avatar
    stonewilder Posts: 420, Reputation: 99
    Full Member
     
    #4

    Jul 22, 2007, 07:07 PM
    Most pregnant woman are proud of being with child and don't mind sharing when they are due so you can't hold that against people. I will say though that it is a brave thing to ask a stranger when the baby is due when they have no sure way of knowing the woman is actually pregnant. I personally would never ask a strange woman that unless she had a maternity shirt on with the word baby and an arrow pointing down, but if I was going to, the worst thing you could say back is,” I'm not pregnant" or " Why do you think that is your business?" The first will be embarrassing to them and humiliating to you. The second will make you seem like a total B and maybe start an argument, but who cares... I don't think too many people would hit a pregnant woman. There is really only one way to make it stop and that is to lose the big tummy. Please don't be offended by that. I do know how hard it is to lose weight and the stomach is always the last to go and it sucks!
    CommonSense2007's Avatar
    CommonSense2007 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #5

    Jul 22, 2007, 07:13 PM
    Stonewilder, I'm not offended. I took an ultrasound to see what was wrong but everything seemed normal so I guess it's time to hit the gym. I just wish the darned thing would disappear but that would be too easy. But everyday I fear people looking at me, smiling and waiting to ask me the dreaded question. I might start saying I'm due in two months... wanna throw me a baby shower?
    bekah876's Avatar
    bekah876 Posts: 445, Reputation: 38
    Full Member
     
    #6

    Jul 22, 2007, 07:15 PM
    Haha... that would be a great response.
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
    Expert
     
    #7

    Jul 22, 2007, 07:21 PM
    Tell them "I'm not pregnant....but when are YOU due?"

    Bet they never ask someone again once it's turned on them.
    GlindaofOz's Avatar
    GlindaofOz Posts: 2,334, Reputation: 354
    Ultra Member
     
    #8

    Jul 22, 2007, 07:24 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by CommonSense2007
    I took an ultrasound to see what was wrong but everything seemed normal so I guess it's time to hit the gym.
    Have you by chance been tested for food allergies? I used to have a big puffy tummy all the time regardless of what I did. I kept refusing to take the answer "there is nothing wrong with you" and finally I had a doctor diagnose me with a wheat allergy. Now, I don't eat wheat and no puffy tummy. Just a thought.
    stonewilder's Avatar
    stonewilder Posts: 420, Reputation: 99
    Full Member
     
    #9

    Jul 22, 2007, 07:48 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by CommonSense2007
    Stonewilder, ......... I might start saying I'm due in two months...wanna throw me a baby shower?


    Ok, but can I hold it at a bar with strippers and lots of alcohol? If anyone ask you if you're pregnant I'll just hit them over the head with my beer bottle.
    dudette6677's Avatar
    dudette6677 Posts: 7, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #10

    Jul 23, 2007, 10:28 AM
    Hah, baby shower for the nonexistant baby. It'd be fantastic! Spread condoms all over the place or something equally sillly.

    Anyway, as for the original comment, don't know if you watch House MD but they'res an episode where he assumes an overweight person is pregnant, uses the line "there's little people inside of you"... fantastic. Turned out though she had a 30lb tumor (benign) on her ovary :-p and then she refused to have it removed.

    People are s... unfortuantly that's just the way the world works. Next time look and them and laugh (I like the idea of 'when are YOU due?' but might not work for the guy so I'd say for guys say 'yep, you're going to be my baby daddy')
    templelane's Avatar
    templelane Posts: 1,177, Reputation: 227
    Ultra Member
     
    #11

    Jul 23, 2007, 10:40 AM
    Maybe it's the way you stand - do you hold your lower back a lot? I asked a woman if she pregnant once because she was doing that.

    She wasn't overweight in the slightest she was just standing in a pregnant way - if you can picture it. She was buying pharmacy medicines so I had to ask if I thought she was- wasn't being rude honest! Luckily she said no but didn't think anything of it, I think she thought it was just a routine question - phew!

    Anyway maybe this contributes to the misunderstanding?
    sharmi's Avatar
    sharmi Posts: 27, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #12

    Jul 23, 2007, 01:09 PM
    I do home exercise like dancing and sit up. If I do it continuely my tummy and hip in nice shape. I don't workout in period days, those days my tummy is get little puffy. Why is that?
    LearningAsIGo's Avatar
    LearningAsIGo Posts: 2,653, Reputation: 350
    Survivor
     
    #13

    Jul 24, 2007, 07:14 AM
    I may have missed it in your post, but have you been to the doctor about it? I'm not trying to freak you out, but people thought that of me.. I had a huge stomach, but no other weight gain... in my case I had ovarian cancer.

    If all is well, just invite them to your "baby shower" at McDonalds playland at 5pm Saturday night... and walk away smiling. ;)
    Pinkor2's Avatar
    Pinkor2 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #14

    Jun 24, 2008, 11:53 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by CommonSense2007
    Okay, I have a big stomach and strangers come up to me and ask when my baby is due. I think it is very presumptuous to think a woman is pregnant just because her belly is big. So I tell the truth and say I'M NOT PREGNANT. And the stranger apologizes and looks stupid and embarrassed. But, until I lose this weight or find out what's wrong with me, what can I tell people or at least let me say right now, NEVER ask a woman when she's due if you don't personally know her. It can be quite humiliating and to me if a person is pregnant it's their business and why does it matter when you're due?:(
    I am not the anorexic type but I am not fat. I came to work today wearing an empire waist and one of patients asked when the baby was due. I was horrified . I used to weigh 115 but I was put on lithium and have only been able to get down to 128. I exercise I do everythiNG I can. I wanted to leave work today
    drgrago's Avatar
    drgrago Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #15

    Oct 30, 2008, 02:35 AM
    The first time I was asked this question was by a substitute teacher in front of ALL the other teachers in the lounge at a pot-luck. She said, "So, do you think you're going to make it the next few weeks until summer to deliver?" Humiliating! Dead silence! "I'm not pregnant" is all I said. She felt so bad, she started crying! I felt more bad for her than myself, and found I was comforting her! Ha!

    I have four kids... the youngest 7. Use to love being pregnant because everyone rubbed my five-week stomach so excited about the baby "due any minute." They have pills to cure depression, beauty, and everything under the sun, but they can't cure stupid, ha!

    Honestly? If you can't beat it, join it! I have a great sense of humor. Hear are some responses:

    "Oh! This?" (Pointing to my stomach). "That's something Jenny Craig was suppose to fix but she never did."

    "No, actually I'm not pregnant, but don't feel bad. I just carry all my weight there. Hey, at least you didn't think I was just fat! I'm actually flattered because the rest of my body apparently appears 'normal'!"

    Fool: "When's the baby due?"
    Me: "7 years ago!"

    Hope you find one of these helpful! And remember, you are beautiful no matter how big you are. Why some of the sweetest, kindest, funniest people in the world are large!

    God Bless You!
    Roxanne

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search


Check out some similar questions!

I just had a baby 6 months ago could I be pregnant again? [ 7 Answers ]

Hi I am 21 years old I just had my first baby in April and it was a rough pregnancy I found out that I have an autoimmune diease which one is not clear yet we just know I clot easily. Anyhow I developed Preeclampsia in my 9th month of pregnancy and was induced 2 weeks before my due date. My...

Bleeding before period is due.pregnant? [ 3 Answers ]

I've been trying to get pregnant for the past 3 months. I did not use contraception before that as my partner had a vasectomy which has now been reversed. Today I have had some really light bleeding although I am not due my period for another 3 days. I don't feel my usual psycopathic tendencies...

Pregnant with a married mans baby [ 6 Answers ]

About 4 months ago I meet a man that was still married but separated from his wife. He fell for me fast. I became pregnant about 2 months into us dating and this past christmas he ended it with me and went back to his wife knowing that I was pregnant. What do you think I should do?

When's the baby due? [ 3 Answers ]

How long does it take for her to know if she's pregnant?

Could my baby be pregnant? [ 1 Answers ]

Hi All, I have 2 beautiful mini doxens/dachshunds who I've managed to keep apart for 3 weeks (I'm exhausted!) I was wondering what my girls 1st sign of pregnancy would be... I m planning to have one litter only, I guess 6 months from now. But in case he got her behind my back, just want to know...


View more questions Search