i just reacently broke my virginity. its was damn painfull!!!!

there is just one problem, i dont feel any pleasure while my man is thrusting. we dont get to do it often but when we do its still sore. he is very gentle though. ok, he is african so he is BIG. i nid some help.what is wrong with me. and no, i was not circumsized or any wierd stuff like that. i just want to feel pleasure wen am making love to my love.

Fr_Chuck

Ok just a note, I do hope you are old enough to understand fully what you are doing,

And next I hope you understand that you have to use protection not only for pregnancy but also the 100's of other things you can catch.

As for pain yes the first couple of times can be more painful.

I will not go into a sex class here ( others will surely give better links for that) but sexual pleasure comes from proper foreplay and the emotional enjoyment of being with the one you care for. Tell him to slow down and make sure you are enjoying this also.

Also race does not make size,

bibi

thanx for your reply. yes, i am old enuf and i could not have done it with a beta person. i do lve the guy and i do believe we do enuf foreplay.

fhforever19

Is that it will hurt for a while. Depending on his size, and yours for that matter. I started to have sex when I was 16, and no matter what I did it still hurted for a full year. Just take your time!! and you will feel pleasure soon!!

Feli

bizygurl

Sometimes it takes awhile, I didn't really start enjoying it until almost a year after I lost my virginity. Your body just needs to get use to it, I promise it will. This happens for most people.

Chery

http://www.sextutor.com/masturbation_female.shtml

There are a lot of good books and sites that will help you learn about sexuality and the joys of it. Also, remember that in this day and age, there are many dangers out there too, so please by all means, read up on the diseases you can get if not properly protected. It would be a shame to have your life shortened by not getting educated.

The site above will help you get to learn your body and what you like to get 'ready' for those 'quickies' as you explained that you don't get together that often, and probably don't have much time. Time, however, is what you need to prepare yourself mentally and physically for an enjoyable sexual encounter. The worst thing you both can do is to just 'get to it' without massaging, feeling, and learning about each other, so that you can get ready for the final 'act'. There is more to sex than just the thrusting - that's not respectful of the guy, and will hurt the girl, no matter what age, or how long she's been sexually active.

Another important thing is to communicate with each other, tell him that you are still dry and it hurts - make him consider you and wait until you are ready. There are also some lubricating gels that you can purchase and they might help make things easier, so tell him to get some and by all means, a lot of condoms with lubricant on them.

This experience in your life's chapter should be fun, not a chore, so again, talk to him and make him understand that you need to enjoy it too.

All the luck, and please keep us posted.


Keep in mind: Safety first will reduce panic later!

educatedhorse_2005

how about lubrication
that always helps

Chery

Sorry, but post-virginal tissue and mental state are not always 'ready' for a quicky - no matter how much lubricant is used. I did suggest a gel and lubricated condom, but that's only a minor part (condom important for safety, yes) but getting emotionally 'ready' is something that not all males understand and need to learn about.
Learning about human sexuality is something the couple should share together and communicate about way before it's even practiced.

educatedhorse_2005

lubrication always helps in this situation
if the lady went to a doctor that is what he would tell her

bibi

k thanx. will try lubrication. tem let u know how it wenr. its no that we have quickies as such. its just that we dont ge enuf tym with each other to get spontainious sex its af if we have to plan for it. its an 'are u free later' situation. we bith in univercity and have lot of work to do. one year you say. one year??? wow, that a long time to wate, but lucky for me he is gentle and patiant. but bsides the physical pain, it hurts me that he too is frustrated. he doesnt really say it bt i can c it in his face. n e way, thanx a lot u guyz, i will keep u posted. and yedd i do approve of your advice.