As some of you already know, I am getting married this year. We moved the wedding date up from August to June. I have to mail my invitations very soon as we have people coming from as far away as Japan (I live in Canada). I am having an evening wedding and I am not inviting any children. What is the proper way to ensure people do not bring their kids to the wedding? I don't want to offend anyone, and I LOVE kids but I have been to many a wedding that has been ruined by a crying child. Please help!!

Also, my sister is having her first child in the next couple of weeks and I don't know how to break it to her that her baby can't come either...this is a very delicate situation. Any suggestions??

smbaxter1265

We ran into this problem when we were going to invite my fiance's small church to our wedding. The church has members with children that are very disruptive in a normal service (with a congregation that size... it is probably hard not to disrupt!), and we feared what would happen during our vows.

Here is how we handled our invite to the congregation:

Groom and Bride
Invite the ChurchName Family
To share as witnesses with their family and friends in their vows of marriage

Saturday April 11th at 2 p.m. at Church Name
Cake and punch reception to follow

In respect for the reverence of the occasion, we ask that adults only attend the ceremony.

the1unv

I will toss in something........My brother was married 2 years ago, My sister-in-laws father spent over $200,000 on the wedding. There was hundreds of people there. The entire wedding was shot on three different cameras from different angles, then put together for an awesome video. I was visiting the other day and we watched the tape........the best parts were watching the kids.....their looks, actions, ect..... The reason for me saying this, I noticed a few suggestions of an "cut off" age. Well in watching this tape it is obvious that there are 4 year old kids with more respect and longer attention spans then some 14 year olds. I dont think a cut off age would help. If I were you with your situation I would send out invitations stating " My fiancee and I are throwing an adult party at which we will be married, Family BBQ and childrens party to follow on Sunday afternoon"
I would not want to be in your shoes, I do understand, Just Have Fun !!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mike

sad and upset

Actually, I pretty much disagree totally with the no child premise. I think it is mean spirited. What about your out of town guests?

I was just informed 2 days ago that I would not be allowed to take my baby to our good friends' wedding. We live in NYC. They live in Boston. We have no family or other friends willing to care for a child in either location. They think we should hire a nanny for 2 or 3 days from an ad in the paper (Scary) and pay for the nanny's room, expenses, and our own...

While I agree it is the couple's day, they have made certain we will never be part of any other days.

On the other hand, if they just said, "It will be a small wedding with just a few guests." We likely wouldn't be offended.

KateBell88

I'd just write on the invitation "Mr and Mrs...." or "..... and partner" if anyone asks just be honest and say that there aren't going to be any children there

yo-yo

how long is your wedding ceremony? ten, twenty minutes? most kids can sit and be quite for that length of time. from all the brides that i knew, they were not even listening to the people attending during the ceremony, they were focused on their husband. and most people take their screaming kids out of the room because it's quiet and THEY are embarrassed when this happens. but it's your wedding, and if you want to be bride-zilla, then tell people not to bring their kids. or better suggestion is to hire a sitter to watch the little ones in another room at the location of your wedding. that way people won't miss your wedding because they have a little one, and you won't hurt anyone's feelings.