What to do?

acealot1 · #1 Dec 25, 2008, 07:46 AM

Hi , Lester here! and I am 17 years old.

So what happened was I met this girl online through an online game, we chatted awhile and eventually got to know each other through msn. What happen was at the time i knew her, she was experiencing a post "break-up" with her boyfriend. Lets call her "W". So I just accompanied her and try to get her standing back on her feet.

During this period, I had a little crush on her , a rather slight one , because I thought that being online friends , we would eventually just go back to being accquataince ( like not chatting at all ). I came to realised that she had similar interests to me and her lifestyle was pretty much the same as mine. So after awhile, she hinted me to asked her out , so I did.

At first when I saw her, to be honest , I didn't really find her to be appealing to me, she wasnt bad-looking but maybe just not my type. So we went through the movie , dinner and yeah it ended. Saying she enjoyed herself.

Then she confessed to me, that she liked me a day or 2 later. I am kinda not sure what to do at the moment.

To be honest, I have been single for well through all my life. When I was younger around 13 , I almost got into a relationship but my mum broke it. Then around 16, I confessed to another girl whom I like for 2 and a 1/2 years but she couldn't return me the feelings.

What should I do now? I am afraid that If I agree , I may not really like her and might end up hurting her like her other relationships. My feelings are abit hazy now and there are other female friends outside i know whom I have crushes on.

Do you think I should tell her to , "give me the chance to love her"?
Would it be rude or insincere since I have other possible girls in mind?
Maybe I am someone who prefers to love a girl , than for her to love me. I am not sure.

I know this is a rather long question but thank you for taking your time to read it.
Thanks much for helping me! =)

ISneezeFunny · Dec 25, 2008, 08:07 AM

I'm ambivalent on this as...

1. You didn't give her much of a chance. You were talking to her, getting to know her, and you liked her. But the minute you saw her, boom, you closed the door on her. Seems a bit shallow, no?

2. Granted, if you don't share the same feelings, then tell her straight. Tell her you had a great time, but you're just not interested in her the way she's interested in you. Hopefully, you and her can remain friends.

So. Take your pick.

LifeChangesMan · Dec 25, 2008, 08:40 AM

Alright Pal,

Merry Christmas!

But, let's say your only seventeen...oh, wait you are!

Wonderful, okay, listen man you are going to meet so so many girls on your life path, and trust me your going to know when it clicks with you and another, it hits you like a sack of bricks and it comes when you least expect it naturally.

My advice to you, is just simply tell this girl your better off as friends, and that you didn't feel any emotions towards her, it's still very early and you really shouldn't step on her toes too much but it's the right thing to do.

But trust me about the finding someone thing...

Yours Truly,
LCM

talaniman · Dec 25, 2008, 09:18 AM

Being honest, and upfront, is so important, and considerate of her feelings.

Altenweg · Dec 25, 2008, 09:30 AM

Sadly, physical attraction is a large part of a relationship. It sucks, but it is true.

If you aren't attracted to her, and aren't willing to give her a chance based on personality alone, then tell her and move on.

She sounds like great friend material, but obviously you aren't ready to move her into a girlfriend position.

Good luck.