My boyfriend and I have been going out for a few weeks and he has put his arm around me once but our class was playing a game. Then in our classes he will sit next to me when he can like when we are aloud to move around and stuff. One day I went up to him and gave him a hug but he didn't do anything he just stood there. Then one of my friends told him to give me a hug and kept telling him to(I didn't know that she was doing that until she told me) and he still hasn't or won't. I asked him why he wouldn't or didn't and he just said I don't know. But he will say "I love you" to me
And that's it he won't do anything else. So how do I get him to hold my hand or give me a hug or anything like that.

Wait until he is ready, do not pressure him. Tell your friends to stop telling him what to do. That only puts more pressure on him and will make him more scared to hug you because everyone will be expecting it and watching his every move.

Just leave it be and he will hug you when he feels comfortable.

Maybe next time he says I love you, hug him and see if he hugs you back then.

Ask him?

Or, why don't you just gently loop your arm through his as you're walking along, or touch him on the arm (not too much) as you're talking to him, or put your arm around him to say 'hi' or 'bye' when you see him?

It may be that he feels awkward with physical contact, or just doesn't know what to do - try teaching him by example, and if this doesn't work, you may need to ask him what's going on...

Maybe he just isn't comfortable with public desplays of affection. Ever think about that one? Is he a little bit shy? Have you ever seen him show any type of affection towards anyone else?

Or like Dyno said, maybe he is just not ready for that. Gemini could have been spot on too.

If physical touch is something that you must have right now, just start taking charge. But don't be clingy and hang all over him.

Yeah, don't do it in public. Do it somewhere private. Hug him softly so he feels your body and whisper that you love him. But don't have an audience that makes comments!

I think you relax, and stop putting pressure on him to be more affectionate publicly. Things develop in time, so don't push it.

I'm not putting pressure on him. That's the only time I did that besides another time I went up to him and put my arm around him and said bye. But he isn't shy and he has shown some affection towards other people. He doesn't really let very many people give him hugs but why won't he let his own girlfriend give him a hug? I don't full understand it.

Also many schools ( you keep saying "in class") have rules against signs of affection in school.

Do you date , see either other after school

Hello Batgirl,

For some people it takes time to warm up and show affection, especially public affection.

He may come from a family that doesn't show affection in the sense of holding hands, kissing, and hugging.

He might also be trying to be respectful of your feelings.

Don't push it though.

Good luck.

How old are you two?

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My boyfriend and I have been going out for a few weeks

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May take longer than that to get to know each other enough to answer your question, or be comfortable with each other.

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Originally Posted by talaniman

May take longer than that to get to know each other enough to answer your question, or be comfortable with each other.

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Are you in middle school or high school:confused:

Yeah we see each other after school, well most of the time. At my school there is the rules for PDA but we don't really get in trouble since to many people do it. So it doesn't matter.


Oh and Im not going to pressure him because I don't want to ruin our realationship.

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Originally Posted by batgirl1492

Oh and Im not going to pressure him cus i dont want to ruin our realationship.

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How old are you all?

We are really close though we were good friends before we stared going out. He has always liked me. High School, 15.

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Originally Posted by batgirl1492

We are really close though we were good freinds before we stared going out. He has always liked me. High School, 15.

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Don't push the issue.. you are way to young.:)

Yeah like I said I'm not going to pressure him. I don't won't to lose this relationship or him even as a friend. When he wants to he can do watever. Also, that's not to young in junior high people were making out & some girls got pregnant. Now that's to young for stuff like that.

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Originally Posted by batgirl1492

Yeah like I said I"m not going to pressure him. I dont wont to lose this relationship or him even as a friend. When he wants to he can do watever. Also, thats not to young in junior high people were making out & some girls got pregnant. Now thats to young for stuff like that.

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Don't be so anxious to have a boyfriend. Concentrate on your education.. If it's meant to be it will be. Junior High is really to young to
Date. Those girls in middle school should be an example of what can happen when you're to young to have a relationship. Is this boy 15?:confused:

Yeah he is the same age as me. But I am in high school is that still to young?

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Originally Posted by batgirl1492

Yeah he is the same age as me. But i am in high school is that still to young?

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Hugging, kissing, cuddling, touching leads to other things. Suppose you all date out of school and things get out of control? I don't think you are a bad girl at all. Maybe this guy knows things could get out of control and yes fifteen is too young, unless he comes to your house while your parents are there and you two watch movies and just hang out. Good Luck... You seem like a nice young lady:)