At Ask Me Help Desk you can ask questions in any topic and have them
answered for free by our experts. To ask questions or participate in
answering them you must register for a free account. By registering you
will be able to:
Get free answers from experts in any of our 300+
topics.
Hey. I'm just curious as to everyone's reasons as to why they want to lighten their skin. No one is here to judge!!!! Everyone has different reasons, one reason is not better than the other. Some people may be doing it because of social class and social standards (I know in a lot of Asian countries a lot of the social structure is dictated by skin color), some may be doing it for their own personal liking, some were teased, maybe you think it suits or facial features better, maybe you have a few skin discolorations, you were inspired by a celebrity, you're doing it for fashion, etc. What's your reason?
My reason: I'm of African descent. My father is very dark my mother is very fair. I came out dark. Like the skin complexion of the singer Kelly Rowland. I've never had a problem with my complexion all the way up until junior high school. I always thought I was really pretty. I loved my skin color. I ENJOYED getting darker. I was just so happy with myself. UNTIL. Junior High started. And I started getting teased and told I was too dark. And all of the guys would only be interested in the fairer skinned girls. I love dark brown skin. Still until this day. I LOVE it. I think it's beautiful. But what I think and what a lot of people in society think.... Is totally different. So when I was around 15 I started rummaging through the contents in my mothers cabinet and I started bleaching my skin. I was really new to it and I didn't tell my mother what I was doing and so I used Movate in large quantities with NO MIXING and it really broke me out really bad and just made my skin a mess. But it did make it lighter. Lol. Of course I stopped using it. I started using a variety of other things that got my skin to the beautiful color that it is now. I know society may tell us that it is wrong to want to lighten our skin. But the question is. Would you rather be RIGHT and UNHAPPY? Or lighten your skin and be WRONG and HAPPY? Because right now, I'm sure many people would say I'm wrong for lightening my skin. But am I wrong for liking the fact that men find me to be very beautiful now that my skin is fairer? Am I wrong for placing higher in beauty pageants because my skin is fairer? Am I wrong for wanting to be happy? Am I wrong for wanting to obtain a husband? I can honestly say. The way I was treated when having dark skin, compared to my golden caramel complexion now. Is TOTALLY different. Why should I be shunned because I want to reap the benefits that a woman with lighter skin receives?
And please avoid childish comments like: "Well I'm already light, but I just want to be a shade lighter." Bottom line. You're still lightening your skin. And please don't bash the next persons reason. They have a right to do what they want!
People are so quick to judge and you can never know anyone's true motivation for doing something until you've lived just one day in their life. This is why I try not to judge people, even the ones who did call me demeaning names for being dark skinned, because you become a biproduct of the toxic society you live in unless you either choose to go against the grain or play the game.
... But, it was confusing because I would look at the girls features and there’s was not different than mine or they were actually unattractive with messed up teeth, one also had serous behaviour problems but the guys didn't care...I thought that was weird...
... I liked having brown skin and remembered trying to decide which shade I liked best, the darker rich complexion of beautiful Naomi Campbell so I can tan. Or the lighter brown complexion of Tyra Banks, so some how I would have to lighten. I never could decide because I always considered all shades to be so beautiful and focused more on more on the features...
..Honestly I thought to myself they were all fools, because I am the same only lighter and they were shallow. But, the much positive treatment I would prefer any day. Why should I have to suffer for the rest of my life? I rather be happy and treated better, the difference is no mistake. Would I suggest other people should lighten? Of course not, nor would I ridicule if one wants to lighten...
..Many do not realize, but lightening your skin for beauty is no different than darkening your skin for beauty. It is your preference and to me quite easily understood.
...truly sorry for the long post.
Wow, I really identify with what you've said here! Even though, I've never been full-on light-colored, I have noticed different treatment (depending on my color & hair styles)..mostly from other brown and black ppl. Esp. guys in the dating scene. That's a whole book unto itself.
Even some women seem to pick girlfriends by shade. I've spent most of my life in mixed circles & was always one of the darker people around...by accident or design lol.
I think if you can get the color you like (brightening or bronzing) without damaging yourself in the process it's cool. I also see beauty more in the structure and person's attitude.
Well, no matter what I do now, I'll be the darkest in my household. My husband's European and our oldest child gets close to my natural color in the summers. I'll have a twin for part of the year at least. LOL!
Innuendo- I totally agree with you on trying to strive toward being beautiful. I am just naturally such a competitive person. I have this urge to always have to be the best. NO MATTER WHAT. And if having darker skin automatically sets me back, then I am going to lighten my skin. I'm obsessed with beauty.
Its a New Day- I totally agree with you. Often times I considered just lightening my blemishes. But when I see how much lighter it makes me. I figure why stop?
Nikki- Wow. Girl I'm sorry that the people at the bank did that to you! That is soooo unbelievably RUDE! And such a hurtful thing to do to a young girl. And I couldn't imagine my mother saying something like that to me. Especially in front of a white girl and a bi racial girl. I would have been crushed! And boys are so stupid. So very stupid. They'll say stupid things. Especially the young ones.
Golden Boy- Can you just shut up. You say the most idiotic things and I wished you never joined this board. And you irritate the hell out of me. Out of all the things Golden Girl typed.... All you could ask her is if she used the same brand of bleaching cream you did? Go reevaluate yourself.
Golden Girl- I relate with soooooo much of what you said! Sooooo much! It never really hit me until 7th grade that lighter skin was better. Because up until then I had gone to an all white school where I was like 1 of 5 black children in the school, and no one really cared about race. But let me tell you. I got to Junior High and all the lighter skinned girls were just seen as more attractive. Even if they didn't dress as well as me. They had jacked up teeth. Mediocre facial features. It just didn't matter. Because their skin was light they were put up on this pedestal. And I too was confused. Because I KNEW even at that age that I was pretty. My nose my lips my eyes everything went together so well. But no one seemed to notice, nor care. I could not IMAGINE having to live with an older sister who is lighter than me and who has lighter eyes. That would not be fun at at all to live in her shadow. I commend you for being strong though. And your boyfriend sounds like an . My ex was like that too. Do you know one time he actually asked me to stick out my hand so he could put his next to mine and compare whose hand was lighter? UGH. (We were the SAME EXACT SHADE. Lol!) He even told me he would NEVER date a girl who is darker than him. Before we started dating he told me he only dates girls lighter than him. I wonder if that's why he doesn't want to be with me anymore.... Well I'm lighter than him now by several shades. Ha!
Oh and I've noticed some girls will purposely hang out with girls darker than them just to get more attention. I had a dominican friend. She used to do that. Then she noticed I started getting more attention than her when I started perming my hair and lightening up and dressing nicer. She doesn't like to hang out with me anymore. Hm. I wonder why.
I have a severe overbite, and was teased mercilessly for it all throughout school- elementary, junior high, high school, I'm a sophomore in a major university now and people still make hurtful comments about it. I think the rest of my face is attractive enough, but I have almost no confidence.
I thought maybe, if I lighten, I'll be pretty in spite of that. I have noticed that light skinned women get treated much better, and I want some of that positive attention for myself.
I have a severe overbite, and was teased mercilessly for it all throughout school- elementary, junior high, high school, I'm a sophomore in a major university now and people still make hurtful comments about it. I think the rest of my face is attractive enough, but I have almost no confidence.
I thought maybe, if I lighten, I'll be pretty in spite of that. I have noticed that light skinned women get treated much better, and I want some of that positive attention for myself.
Sort of. Buck teeth is when only the two front teeth are larger/more prominent than the rest. An overbite is when the entire top half of your teeth stick out more. A little bit of an overbite (like a few millimeters)is normal- most people don't have their top and bottom teeth perfectly aligned. I just have a big one
Sort of. Buck teeth is when only the two front teeth are larger/more prominent than the rest. An overbite is when the entire top half of your teeth stick out more. A little bit of an overbite (like a few millimeters)is normal- most people don't have their top and bottom teeth perfectly aligned. I just have a big one
awww that so sad you were picked on.
You can get braces or Invisalign to help with that.
But you know what some people are actually cute that way!! lol
Maybe you don't feel you look nice with it but keep your head up anyway.
I started wanting lighter skin when i was told that i was brown skinned. Prior to being told that i was always told i was the lightskinned girl, but i guess its all perception. Anyway, I know this will sound racist but i think lighter skin looks more clean and pure. I love how clear the skin looks when its very light brown, and plus I want to look racially ambiguous, because even at this shade, people think i am not black (biracial, still black though). So for me i would say its half racial, and half of it is because it looks pure and clean. very dark skin looks dirty to me ( in know its sounds terrible) and they also look like they smell bad.
I hate that i believe this way
My husband's European and our oldest child gets close to my natural color in the summers. I'll have a twin for part of the year at least. LOL!
Linear Mode
