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J_perry23 · Mar 24, 2007, 09:09 PM

Hello I am 23 years old and My partner and I are looking to have a baby the problem is we are both males. I know that most people find it wrong in many ways for two men or two women to have a child together. Right now myself and my partner would like to adopt a child, but it is not right for us to. So right now our last resort is to turn to someone that is willing for a gay couple to raise a child as there own. Is there anyway this is possible? Can someone help us in anyway?

John & Chris

RubyPitbull · Mar 24, 2007, 09:22 PM

Hello John & Chris.

Please see this link, I have posted a few websites on it that might help you with your problem. By the way, yes people do find it wrong, but that it THEIR problem, not yours. If you are in a committed loving relationship and can provide a loving, safe, and stable environment for a child, that is all anyone can ask for. It would be nice to change the world though, wouldn't it? :) Good luck!

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/pregna...her-74444.html

automansgirl · Mar 24, 2007, 10:19 PM

I checked out the link RudyPitbull gave and just wanted to add that you may want to hire an attorney as well. Unfortunately most people aren't as trustworthy as we would like. My brother is also homosexual, and would like to use a surrogate in the future, so if you find any good sites please feel free to send them to me. Thanks and good luck!

EnglishRose · Mar 25, 2007, 08:03 AM

Why can't you adopt? Is it for legal reasons or your own personal reasons? I'm not sure how it works in other countries. I personally am not keen on the idea of a surrogate, not when there are so many beautiful babies out there looking for good homes. But I guess that's up to the individual. The laws here on surrogates are totally different too.

automansgirl · Mar 25, 2007, 09:27 AM

You typically can't adopt in the united states if you are in a homosexual relationship. My brother is also talking about adopting a child from India. I believe you can adopt outside of the country, but they usually don't let you inside the country. It's very difficult.

EnglishRose · Mar 25, 2007, 09:32 AM

It is a shame. If two people are ready and willing to love a child I don't think their sexual preference should be an issue. I think adopting a child from another country is a wonderful idea, as long as you are certain you can bring them home.

TheSavage · Mar 25, 2007, 09:36 AM

Originally Posted by EnglishRose

It is a shame. If two people are ready and willing to love a child I dont think their sexual preference should be an issue. I think adopting a child from another country is a wonderful idea, as long as you are certain you can bring them home.

Yes,sadly homophobia is alive and thriving here in the states. Just look back at 9/11 -- pat robertson said it was his gods wrath for allowing gays to be happy. -- Savage

EnglishRose · Mar 25, 2007, 09:46 AM

Well, some people are far from sane. It just seems nuts that people can't except reality. In England we seem to be progressing very suddenly. Our government are working really hard to deal with discrimination, sadly at the expense of other equally important issues but never mind, so same sex families are on there way. I hope.

automansgirl · Mar 29, 2007, 08:59 PM

Sleeper, I think that you are extremely out of line! Who are you to tell someone that you hope they don't get a child? I'm sure that you don't "believe" in a homosexual lifestyle because you are too afraid of homosexuals to actually get to know anyone who might be. I may or may not be "for" same sex marriage, but that is none of your business. I do, however, believe that if two individuals love and care for one another and are emotionally capable to raise a child, they have every right to do so. Now I'm sure you are probably thinking, "How could two homosexuals be emotionally capable?" Don't worry, I've heard them all. The fact that someone may be homosexual has nothing to do with their mentality. I could just as easily say that you are ignorant, therefor you should not be able to breed. We don't want to spread the growth of nonthinkers like yourself. However, that is not something I would say. I think that you should have simply kept your thoughts to yourself. No where on this post did it ask if you would please put your two cents in and degrade an individual just because you don't understand homosexuals. They are people just like you and me. I believe this post was for information on surrogate mothers. Hang on... oh wait, it is! (I had to read it again to make sure). And yes that was sarcasm. Please don't be so rude again. This is a wonderful site for people to ask questons and receive answers, not to be demeaned for their lifestyle.

automansgirl · Mar 29, 2007, 09:47 PM

You're right, it was meant as a joke. If you recall it was hypothetical! Regardless of how you feel about it, and the excuse of saying you're sorry doesn't mean you should have posted it. Did anyone ask if you didn't get homosexuals or their relationships? No. Did anyone ask if you thought they should have a child or not? No.
I also don't understand how you came up with the idea that I haven't had a well rounded life by my post. Because my brother is gay?
Besides, you did say "please dont come at me like that ok," but I don't think that J_perry23 asked you to come at him like that. You are a complete fool.

sleeper · Mar 29, 2007, 09:54 PM

This site is for people to say how they feel or how they want you to feel... maybe I wanted him to second think it hey! Its not a all feel good site I don't bull people I say what I have to say to help ---------or just make you (think)...

sleeper · Mar 29, 2007, 09:59 PM

See I did't even really read your post are you kidding me still talking about the gay talk yeah that's why because your brother is gay come onnnnnn how old are you!

Matt3046 · Mar 29, 2007, 10:04 PM

OK now back to the question, regardless of your lifestyle I think that most adoption places would think you are too young to adopt. Your idea about the surrogate is the best if one of you were related by blood to the child it would provide a much better footing legally. And not to butt in but you can argue through the private messages. Although I am not trying to tell you your business.

zelda · Mar 31, 2007, 01:46 PM

Originally Posted by J_perry23

Hello I am 23 years old and My partner and I are looking to have a baby the problem is we are both males. I know that most people find it wrong in many ways for two men or two women to have a child together. Right now myself and my partner would like to adopt a child, but it is not right for us to. So right now our last resort is to turn to someone that is willing for a gay couple to raise a child as there own. Is there anyway this is possible? Can someone help us in anyway?

John & Chris

First of all it is not wrong for a gay couple to raise a child. You have just as much right as what straight people do and don't ever let anyone tell you different. Maybe one of your close girlfriends would consider having a baby for you and your partner to raise as your own

RubyPitbull · Mar 31, 2007, 02:36 PM

Originally Posted by sleeper

this site is for ppl to say how they feel or how they want you to feel.........maybe i wanted him to second think it hey! its not a all feel good site i dont bull ppl i say what i have to say to help ---------or just make you (think).....

Sleeper. Frankly, I have been a bit disappointed in a few of the remarks I have seen you make over the past few days. It saddens me greatly. Please give what I am saying here some consideration. Unfortunately, many people assume that since this is a public forum, they have a right to "say how they feel" as you state here. Okay, fine. Let's take this out of context for a moment.

How would you feel if you had a question about your dog, say maybe she was sick and you needed help and posted it in the dog forum. One of the responses to your posting is someone saying how pitbulls are terrible dogs, they attack at will, viciousness is bred into them and it is their general nature so no one should have them as pets, and they should be banned and/or euthanized. I know you have seen posts similar to what I am saying. You would be (and have been) quite upset by that, as I was (would be) myself. No one has the right to state that under your dog post, no matter how they feel. Can you understand at all that what you have done here on this post, is the same thing? J_Perry is looking for constructive help. Not to be told some of the things you said here, which I now notice have been deleted by administration.

We all need to be sensitive to the fact that this is a help forum. Not a public blog. Do you understand at all what I am saying here?