[Idontwantabreak]

My girlfriend and I have been dating for 3 1/2 years now. We started dating when I was 18 and she was 15 I'm now 22 and she's 19. A couple of months ago we moved off to college together and share an apartment together. Before now neither one of us had ever lived outside our parents homes so the move was kind of stressful. Over the last month or so since we've moved we've been fighting more than usual. We are two people who have always been upfront with each other and have always shared the same thoughts on our relationship... Until now things are kind of tricky. We have spent the last 3 years together pretty much nonstop. We always did everything together whether it was just the two of us or a group. My girlfriend last week all of a sudden said she wants a break. She feels like we don't have enough independence from each other and that we need to learn to do things on our own and discover some things we like to do that the other may necessarily not. Before we would always give up something we wanted to do if we thought the other one didn't because we wanted to be able to do everything together. We've talked a lot and I agree with her that we could both really use some individual hobbies that we can do on our own without feeling guilty for leaving the other out. So the good news is we agree that this would be a change for the better regarding our relationship except she still wants a break. She thinks it'll be easier to work on individual goals without the extra pressure of a relationship and that may be true. However when I ask her about us getting back together she always tells me to stop because getting back together isn't her focus right now and that even though we've always been a great couple she says there's no guarantee we will end up together again but we agreed that neither one of us want to see other people and that when the time comes that she wants a relationship we'll try to work things out. I guess the hardest thing I'm having trouble with is wrapping my head around the whole situation and the fact that she's not even willing to talk about us getting back together and that she doesn't see me that way right now. I know her better than anyone and its clear as day that she still loves me and has feelings for me but I can tell she's fighting back these feelings and I'm just not sure why? If anyone has any thoughts on this I'm all ears.

[C0bra_M3nace]

Sounds like she's just bored of the relationship and is trying to find a way out. Typically, people use a break as a tactic to break up, because it's a lot easier than just flat out breaking up. Now don't get me wrong, some people have successful relationships following a break, but the odds are against it.

You shouldn't have to sacrifice a relationship to find independence, that's an immediate red flag. You should be able to do the things you want to do regardless of the "extra pressures of a relationship". If you both were such an amazing couple you'd tackle this problem together, not apart.

Take this break as a time to start moving on. Come to grips with the fact that you may not be together again. For your own good, don't wait around for this girl to make up her mind. Live your life. If she doesn't want to be a part of if then that's her problem, it shouldn't be yours.