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    selena4's Avatar
    selena4 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Aug 8, 2012, 06:40 AM
    Why am I so jealous and how can I be sure of his faithfulness?
    I have a problem.I am very jealous,specially when my boyfriend talks with other girls. Every time he gets calls and messages from girls thai I don't even know.he sometimes doesn't even tells me about all this,saying that it was not important. I even doubt him sometimes. His past with girls is shocking.he always talked about sex with them and he was not faithful neither. That is maybe what I fear. He tells me that he has change and I see that. But how can I be sure?
    C0bra_M3nace's Avatar
    C0bra_M3nace Posts: 1,296, Reputation: 223
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    #2

    Aug 8, 2012, 07:24 AM
    No trust; no relationship.

    You can make yourself trust someone, you either do or you don't or you do until you don't. Period.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #3

    Aug 8, 2012, 07:30 AM
    He is not obligated to tell you about his calls, why should he have to give you all the details of calls from friends.

    If you don't trust him, you can not have a relationship
    selena4's Avatar
    selena4 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Aug 8, 2012, 07:53 AM
    I don't know what to do because every time he does something that makes me doubt him. And sometimes he is different with me concerning his way of talking and so on. He is now abroad. When I think about all the girls that he might have talked with,don't even know what he is doing,it makes me more jealous.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #5

    Aug 8, 2012, 07:55 AM
    Who in your background wasn't trustworthy so that you have this fear? Your dad?
    selena4's Avatar
    selena4 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Aug 8, 2012, 08:01 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    Who in your background wasn't trustworthy so that you have this fear? Your dad?
    No my ex. I suffered in the past.. all my ex made me suffer.. that's maybe why I fear and maybe that's why I am so possessive
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #7

    Aug 8, 2012, 08:22 AM
    Get counseling, you are going to let a ex relationship ruin future ones.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #8

    Aug 8, 2012, 08:49 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by selena4 View Post
    i have a problem.i am very jealous,specially when my boyfriend talks with other girls. every time he gets calls and messages from girls thai i dont even know.he sometimes doesn't even tells me about all this,saying that it was not important. i even doubt him sometimes. his past with girls is shocking.he always talked about sex with them and he was not faithful neither. that is maybe what i fear. he tells me that he has change and i see that. but how can i be sure?
    He has a history of messing with girls you say he is not faithful, plus the fact he gets calls and messages from girls. He is not helping your feelings of mis trust.
    Why are you still with him?
    selena4's Avatar
    selena4 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #9

    Aug 9, 2012, 01:46 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Homegirl 50 View Post
    He has a history of messing with girls you say he is not faithful, plus the fact he gets calls and messages from girls. He is not helping your feelings of mis trust.
    Why are you still with him?
    Hhmm I have already given him my heart.. its difficult
    C0bra_M3nace's Avatar
    C0bra_M3nace Posts: 1,296, Reputation: 223
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    #10

    Aug 9, 2012, 03:46 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by selena4 View Post
    hhmm i have already given him my heart.. its difficult
    Sure, but it's only as hard as you let it be. If you can't learn to stand up for yourself, then you're going to get pushed over your entire life.
    rockie100's Avatar
    rockie100 Posts: 313, Reputation: 64
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    #11

    Aug 9, 2012, 05:12 AM
    Often we get ourselves in relationships that echo past ones. If your gut is telling you he is a cheat, he probably is. Think about what it would be like to not have to question your boyfriend. Wouldn't it be nice to trust that he would respect you and not give you reason to think he is up to something else?
    selena4's Avatar
    selena4 Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #12

    Aug 9, 2012, 08:05 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by C0bra_M3nace View Post
    Sure, but it's only as hard as you let it be. If you can't learn to stand up for yourself, then you're going to get pushed over your entire life.
    You are right!
    ahliya's Avatar
    ahliya Posts: 17, Reputation: 0
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    #13

    Aug 11, 2012, 03:26 PM
    I know hw it feels as I have being through all this

    And I got betrayed though
    I should tel you dear when the boy is in touch what other girls too
    And if you stp him you tel him don't do this and if its no frm his plac den tel him str8 den you should leav

    And if he really did stp you den OK of no den dear end this nw
    I swear trust me if it ll be lng its going to be danm hard to mve on

    I know you mate feel that no nthng ll hapn v won't end
    But you this is true and you will defntly remem me when this happens

    So go for what you feel now
    As I am sufrng badly
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
    Dating & Teen Expert
     
    #14

    Aug 11, 2012, 04:30 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ahliya View Post
    I knw hw it feels as I hav being through all this

    And I got betrayed though
    I should tel u dear wen the boy is in touch wot other girls too
    And if u stp him u jus tel him dnt do this n if its no frm his plac den tel him str8 den u shud leav

    And if he realy did stp u den ok of no den dear end this nw
    I swear trust me if it ll b lng its gona b danm hard to mve on

    I knw u m8 feel tht no nthng ll hapn v won't end
    But ya this is true and u wil defntly remem me wen dis hapens

    So jus go for wht u feel now
    As I am sufrng badly
    What?
    Please don't text on this site. It is against the rules. I have no clue what you are saying. Use actual words.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #15

    Aug 11, 2012, 06:07 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Homegirl 50 View Post
    What?
    Please don't text on this site. It is against the rules. I have no clue what you are saying. Use actual words.

    She's capable of using real words. Despite warnings, she does not.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
    Dating & Teen Expert
     
    #16

    Aug 11, 2012, 06:09 PM
    Then in my opinion, she needs to be dealt with.

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