[xxpolxx]

I am recently having a relationship with a divorced man. I am 21 and he is around 47. He has 2 sons and a daughter. The ages of them are 17, 13 and 8. He got divorced 4 years ago and then he found out he is interested to boys. I met him in a gay bar very randomly and fell for him. I am always into mature man. We both like each other very much and I am in love with him. He introduced me to his children and they are OK with me (specially his 8 years old daughter likes me). Now he threw his elder son because he is on drug and other dangerous things. But I don't agree with him. I was a teenager 2 years ago so I understand his situation. I told my boyfriend that it is totally inappropriate to throw his son off cause I think that will make his son hate his Dad and eventually he might do something very dangerous and harmfull to his life. My man doesn't agree with me at all and for this reason we are having conflicts. He also told me that I am not close enough to discuss about his children. This really hurt me cause I was considering his children as mine and he just pushed me away of them . Doesn't that mean he will do it more often in the future?

[Fr_Chuck]

They are his children and you need to stay out of it, it is his choices to make. Next yes, you are almost the same age as his children ( something to wonder if he is viewing you as such at times)

Stay out of it, you have no say in this.

[talaniman]

You better listen to this guy as he is telling you that you are a piece on the side, and just because this bisexual guy has sex with you doesn't mean you have a future, nor should you even think you have a right to tell him how to raise his kids.

From reading your other post you have sex and love confused, I mean, a married guy, and a bi guy?? Your choices are completely nutty.

Sorry but the same answer I gave you applies here too,

Forget fantasy, and get some reality. Sorry to be so harsh and blunt, but I hate to see such a young person waste their youth in LALA land, and be so easily used by guys who don't value you at all.

[xxpolxx]

I have personality and I am honest. I have never cheated on my partner and I can't even think of it cause I can't enjoy sex if I don't feel for the person. But I lie a lot. My lies are completely harmless but of course lies are lies, lying is always bad. When I met my boyfriend I lied a little bit but I confessed them afterwards and he accepted that. But today when I was at work late night (11:50pm) he called me and asked me where I was. I lied to him and told him I was at my aunt's but he understood that I was lying to hear my tone. He hung up and then text me saying I'm liar and bla bla. I texted him back and admitted that I was lying. But I can't tell him that I was at work cause he knows I work till 10 so it is impossible for him to believe that I was working that time. I still haven't told him where I was I just told him I can't tell you where I was cause u will think I am lying again. Since then he stopped replying to my text. I know I lied but I lied so that he doesn't worry about me. I lied so that he doesn't worry. But I screwed up he said he is never going to trust me. I think he is going to break up with me as this is the second time I lied to him. I love him very much he is the only perfect one out there for me. I don't know what to do. By the way I am 21 and he is 47 and I am too beautiful for him so he feels insecure. But I really love him and I will break if I loose him. Do anyone know how can I stop lying. (we are same sex partners)

[Fr_Chuck]

You lied, so he thinks the worst now for sure, There is not excuse, now the relationship is in a lot more danger.

[xxpolxx]

What do I do now? I am ready to do anything to fix it. I believe he can get back to me. He is the only one for me I can't give up on him

[Wondergirl]

Can you stop lying?

[xxpolxx]

I can't help it to be honest. But I barely lie to him.

[talaniman]

Lying comes from fear, and if you have to lie in the first month of being with some one you better find out what you are afraid of and deal with it. Especially since you just got out of a long term relationship 6 or so months ago.

I mean how can trust be built if the whole relationship starts with deceit, and deception of any kind, for any reason? You are poisoning this thing before it can gets off the ground.

[J_9]

I am honest.

I lie a lot.

Do you realize that the two quotes above are contradictory?

[xxpolxx]

Okay no one is helping me out there everyone is judging me just like other people. I need help please help me. By the way he phoned me today and wanted to see me tomorrow. He said he is not all upset cause he can't think of a day without me. I feel the same for him. I'll try my best to be true always. Any tips or advise please?

[talaniman]

No one is judging you, its just we do not see a point in rushing into someone much older than you that you met in a gay bar, with 4 kids that you haven't know for very long at all. I mean you presume that the feelings, strong though they maybe are love, and shared, but most experienced folks would be very cautious since love and lust habe the same flavor at first.

I mean why can't you just slow down and stop assuming this is the real deal, and find out for sure?? I mean you are barely being honest with this guy, so exactly what kind of help where you looking for?