"I'm not good with words and I'd would like some advice about how to do this without seeming offensive or confrontational..."
... dear, dear, dear... the last thing you need to be concerned about is being offensive/confrontational... he wasn't too concerned about leaving you and your child w/ no money or he would've made it a point to be prompt/on-time with his payments... however, if you want to truly find out what you need to know, talk-to/hire a lawyer because they can subpoena his financial records when it comes to child-support issues, otherwise all single fathers would make no more than 10-12K per year and would pay hardly anything in child support, it's all based on income and so if he won't tell you, MAKE him tell you!
Hope that helps, don't be afraid to stand up for your child!
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