[dstars]

Going through similar circumstances. My daughter is 18, raised in a Christian home, thousands spent for private Christian education. She went to one semester of college, and dropped out. She did get a part time job that we were pleased with until we learned she started sleeping with a 22 year old man she works with? He is already involved and living with another women and has a baby as well. She has turned away from us, her faith, and we are literally terrified she is going to become pregnant. There is no doubt she loves this person so she is not willing to hear anything we say, in fact we have become the enemy. We have said nothing negative about this young man who of course we have not had the chance to meet, and most likely never will because he is already involved and is using my daughter. Think he would show his face? There is no doubt in my mind that she would leave home if she had the money to do so. We are hurt and devastated. It is as if we have a stranger living in our home. What hurts the most is she has been dearly loved, never abused, and we moved heaven and earth, worked like dogs, and did without to try and give her a head start in life. Not money wise for we are not rich, but we sacrifaced for her education and well being just to have her throw it all away for some person that will no doubt break her heart once he is done using her. Other than prayer, does anyone have any suggestions? Legal ones?

[JudyKayTee]

You didn't post where you live. I am assuming wherever that is that she is an adult at age 18. No, at that age there is nothing you can do legally.

What part of the situation would you like to address legally?

Certainly you can stop supporting her, stop enabling her.

Where did you get the info about her "boyfriend" (if he can be called that)? I'm not so sure you haven't said anything negative about him. If you haven't, why has she developed her attitude toward you?

There is little you can do except let her make her own mistakes, hope they aren't life damaging.

Were you very controlling and now that she's 18 she's breaking away?

[Synnen]

You gave her everything, and she didn't have to work for it.

Therefore, she never grew any sense of responsibility, or she wouldn't be having sex with another woman's man.

Legally? You can evict her and cut off her funding. Betcha her boyfriend wouldn't stick around if he had to help support her.

[usarocks101]

You should let her be herself for right now if someone loves her sure she will start acting more and more like them I'm sorry to say this but just let her go

[distressed27]

I hear you loud and clear!! My husband and I fear all the same things that you do... all we do every day is pray that some day she gets back on the right track. Hope and prayer is all that we have left at this point. It is frustrating and disappointing because we have worked our whole lives to create a bright future for these young woman. Our hopes and dreams are not "theirs"... if we try to interject, they consider it control. They know everything!! Some days are OK and some are tough! I wish you all the best, but please know that you are not alone, there are a lot of us going through this.

[ScottGem]

I've moved this to the Parenting forum, since your question is more about parenting then law.

From a legal standpoint, all you can do is force her out of your home via an eviction.

But your real problem is communication. You need to communicate with her, discuss her choices and see what she has made them. One thing to mention though, you seem to be concerned about the money spent on her education. That worries me as it could present an attitude that she is rebelling against.

[Synnen]

Since this is in parenting now--I have a HUGE suggestion:

Leave religion out of your conversations with your daughter.

She is an adult, and free to choose her own beliefs. The more you push YOURS onto her, the more she's going to push it away.

My parents are Christian, and I knew that by the time I was 17 that I wasn't going to be. It took me several years of research to choose my religion--and it is NOT the religion of my parents.

You're supporting your daughter financially. She lives with you. Your house--your rules. But ONLY under your roof. You can't tell her who to date, you can't tell her what to do with her life.

Lay down the rules about what her responsibilities are now that she's not going to school--and RENT should be a HUGE portion of that--and stand by them. If she doesn't abide by those rules, evict her.

[ScottGem]

For future reference, questions posted in a Law forum need to be answered with reference to the legal issues. Your response does not do that. However, since I've moved this from the law forum a wider latitude is permitted in answers.

[ScottGem]

For future reference, questions posted in a Law forum need to be answered with reference to the legal issues. Your response does not do that. However, since I've moved this from the law forum a wider latitude is permitted in answers.

[ScottGem]

Good points. This is similar to what I was thinking. I caught the remark in the OP "thousands spent for private Christian education", among others. And I can imagine the OP throwing this up to the daughter.

[Wendigah]

Thank you all for your wisdom and support. It does help to hear what others are experiencing. We are all in it together...