[tyler20]

So I met this Girl on match.com , we hit it off right away we always end up talking hours on end about anything and get flirty with each other. I went out with her a couple nights ago and she texted me that she had a great time and is always looking for new friends.

We talked about it for awhile and she isn't over her last relationship right now and needed time, I didn't know what to say and she took it like I was mad at her, I explained it was just surprising , she said she doesn't want to loose me and looks forward to talking to me and talking to each other and she said once she is ready you never know what could happen.

Our conversations today she seems really conflicted almost like she want's to take back what she said lastnight.

I am wondering what she means , is she interested in EVENTUALLY having a relationship and just wants to get to know each longer or just friends?

[Jeha]

She is giving you mixed signals

[EmoPrincess]

Give her time. I was at a point like this once after breaking up with my exfiance. She needs time. Give it to her

[tyler20]

she is giving you mixed signals

Yes very much , we have been very intimate physically and verbally and she gave me a hug when I dropped her off and said to call her, but then I get home she's sends that text, she continues to text and call me and is ALWAYS asking what I am doing and where I am , Have any ideas I can ask her to maybe get some of a clearer picture ? Should I just continue to be there for her or move?

Give her time. I was at a point like this once after breaking up with my exfiance. She needs time. give it to her

So would it be a good idea to continue to be there for and be friends? This answer might be easier with the other info I posted above.

[EmoPrincess]

So would it be a good idea to continue to be there for and be friends? this answer might be easier with the other info I posted above.

Are you able to settle for friendship for now? If so, then yes continue the friendship

[tyler20]

Are you able to settle for friendship for now? If so, then yes continue the friendship

That's the hard part for me, I don't want to loose her as part of my life since we get a long so great but I want more, but I think if I give her a few months more and be there for her I could be friends during that time and not try to be anymore until she is willing to.

[EmoPrincess]

That's the hard part for me, I don't want to loose her as part of my life since we get a long so great but I want more, but I think if I give her a few months more and be there for her I could be friends during that time and not try to be anymore until she is willing to.

That sounds like a good plan to me.

[tyler20]

Thanks for your insight, if anyone else has anything it would help a lot as well.

[talaniman]

Sure be friends and have fun doing it. But beware getting too attached, and wanting more, may not work that well, as she may not choose a relationship with you after she has gotten over her ex, as no telling how long that may take, and when she does get over it, she will want her freedom to explore.

Naw, forget the romance, and don't always be so available because this sounds more like a rebound than anything serious.

we have been very intimate physically and verbally

Does that mean sex? What the heck are you saying, this is a friends with benefits deal?

[tyler20]

Sure be friends and have fun doing it. But beware getting too attached, and wanting more, may not work that well, as she may not choose a relationship with you after she has gotten over her ex, as no telling how long that may take, and when she does get over it, she will want her freedom to explore.

Naw, forget the romance, and don't always be so available because this sounds more like a rebound than anything serious.

Does that mean sex?? What the heck are you saying, this is a friends with benefits deal?

No it doesn't mean sex it isn't friends with benefits that she wants, that's what I was thinking that she is on the rebound but she told me sooner rather then later because she didn't want to hurt me, but sends signals that she still want's us to be something in time and started to cry when I made it sound like I didn't want to be friends right now.

I agree with the don't be so available, some of my buddies said make her miss you sometimes and doesn't always be available to do something tell her your doing something else and if she really want's a relationship she will say something then.

[talaniman]

Dude sorry but she wants company and attention, and fun to mend her ailing heart. Heck she may even go back to the ex.

If it's a romance you want, you are with the wrong person. Matter of fact, you will waste a lot of time waiting for her, instead of exploring other options. You are already too attached, because of your high hopes.

And your assuming she will give you more by hanging out until she heals. That has never worked.

How old are you two, as this sounds like high school teenage stuff.

[tyler20]

Dude sorry but she wants company and attention, and fun to mend her ailing heart. Heck she may even go back to the ex.

If its a romance you want, you are with the wrong person. Matter of fact, you will waste a lot of time waiting for her, instead of exploring other options. You are already too attached, because of your high hopes.

And your assuming she will give you more by hanging out until she heals. That has never worked.

How old are you two, as this sounds like high school teenage stuff.

She is 21 and I am 23 , we both don't lack experience and Ive dealt with something similar to this before but this seems different for some reason.

[tyler20]

And a note that I mentioned in my original post was that we met on Match.com so we were both assuming we were looking for a relationship.

[talaniman]

How did you handle a situation like this before?

[tyler20]

The other time this happened we went on a few dates and she said she wanted to be friends and wasn't ready to date and never really talked after that, this one makes a point of knowing what I'm doing talking to me, flirts with me and always talks about what she likes about me but says she needs more time.

[talaniman]

She sounds desperate for a friend. Bet the ex is jealous as all get out.

Nine times out of ten, people fresh from a hard break up need time. That's a given, but also nine times out of ten, they never end up with the guy who was there to get them through a hard time. She will be grateful, but that's a long way from what you want.

Just because she put her female charms on you doesn't mean you have to FALL for it.

[Kitkat22]

She sounds desperate for a friend. Bet the ex is jealous as all get out.

Nine times out of ten, people fresh from a hard break up need time. thats a given, but also nine times out of ten, they never end up with the guy who was there to get them thru a hard time. She will be grateful, but thats a long way from what you want.

Just because she put her female charms on you doesn't mean you have to FALL for it.

Jealous Ex... T-R-O-U-B-L-E... :eek:

[johndoe345]

Going through the same thing just met a girl who is not over the ex we banged, but she's really not over it and talks to the ex still has been flat out rude to me and then tells me I'm rude so I say goodbye and say whatever you know no hard feelings you you so the next day I wake up and she had sent a text? I thought this was over with? N said she was in a bad mood and so I have no clue *** is gong on lol

But wait this question must arise on all this, mmk every person we meet has been and a relationship and is most likely either fresh out of one or hasn't been long enough to recover from the previous so if what all you are saying is true wouldn't every single person go back with the ex every time? If this is true how do new relationships ever begin? So with that said there is a way to break this do know what it is? Wish I did. And those who probably do know are too busy getting *** to answer this question lmao