[nottelling]

I've been with my ex for about 2 years... the first 6 months of our relationship where long distance, where we talked everyday, and he also flew in one weekend to see me from across the world. Later that year I decided to go to a university in his country. We recently broke up but we both still love each other very much, it was because he realised that after we finish university we will settle in different parts of the world, due to our family businesses, family, language.. etc. my religion and culture played a role in the break up, since I won't have sex till after marriage. He said that wouldn't be a problem if I knew I was gana marry me in the end, but that wasn't the case. So he said he couldn't continue investing himself into something that will die in the end.
Its been maybe 2 months now of not properly talking, then his birthday came and I went to the other side of the country where he studies to see him. And things kicked off. But today he asked what should we do, in the context of being only friends.
I said I couldn't be his friend, since I am too in love with him, and seeing him with someone else will kill me. So he said I was being unfair since I'm making him choose between a new girl in his life and me as his friend...
What should I do... should I just be his friend and take it.. even if he gets a new girlfriend.
Or should I stop talking to him (although I know I won't be able to sustain it)
He was/is the one person in this country that makes me look forward to the next day.. I really love him, and I know he feels it too... uh and we cnt get back together.
I feel broken. Help.

[Jake2008]

The two of you have already made your choices, you've broken up.

A modified version of a realionship from an exclusive dating one, to a 'friendship' is most likely to fail. As you said yourself, it is too difficult to see him with another girl, and that you love him still, too much.

He has indicated to you that he doesn't want to choose between a new girlfriend, and a friendship with you. But, he really can't have his cake and eat it too. The only needs being met by that arrangement are his.

I would suggest, as hard as it is, to concentrate on allowing the relationship to end, in any regard or form.

You have already survived the worst of breaking up, realizing that long-term, it would not have worked out. Why set yourself up by continuing to maintain that life line of hope.

Maybe in years to come your paths will cross again, and each of you will be in happy relationships with other people.

It was sweet while it lasted, but it's over.

[ZoeMarie]

You're not being unfair in telling him it's too hard to be friends. You're doing the right thing. He's being unfair in wanting you to sit on the sidelines while he goes out with other women. It's VERY hard to be friends with someone you have feelings for. Been there, done that and I'm so glad I don't have to worry about that anymore.

[positiveparent]

It will only serve to cause you more pain.

Let it go its over, move on and leave this person in the past where he belongs.

Its very hard to remain as just a friend when a relationship is over its best to leave it at that.

You'll only end up torturing yourself when you should really be healing.

[talaniman]

You have but one good choice. Cut all contact with each other and have a proper healing from this chapter of your life.
The longer you put this off, the worse it gets.

[parisrose]

You said there is no way you two are able to get married in the future.

Things like this happen to a lot of couples who love each other, life and obstacles get in the way of them having a lifetime together.

You need to stop holding onto something that isn't going to happen, otherwise you are prolonging your pain.