[lovingmonkey14]

My mom and me fight all the time and I'm so sick of it. She's tells me that the way I treat her is so bad and that I hurt her.. well all I can think about is the hurt she's made my family feel when she cheated on my dad. She ruined everything just because she was selfish. And I hate her for that. I'm sick of being looked at like I'm the bad guy on this because she thinks she's so perfect and I'm a little spoiled devil brat. So I am really to the end of my rope here. What can I do, I really and truly just want to move in with my dad that would end of all. I need help and fast cause I feel like I'm just going to snap!

[N0help4u]

You need to leave the past in the past and start fresh. Don't make it into a power struggle of right and wrong.
She may be wrong but she is your mother.

Do you know for sure why she cheated and it wasn't just selfish reasons?
Try being a little more understandind and put aside the way you see how.
What does your dad say?
How is he treating her now?
Can you talk with him about how you feel?

How old are you?

[number9forlife1]

You should just talk to her about it! If you feel like you're about to snap, ask if you 2 can talk... and if you still feel like you're going to snap, tell her and just walk away! That's what I do, and it works most of the time

[lovingmonkey14]

You should just talk to her about it! If you feel like you're about to snap, ask if you 2 can talk...and if you still feel like you're gonna snap, tell her and just walk away! that's what i do, and it works most of the time

But it's not even really like were mother and daughter, I can't even talk to her about stuff because I just don't feel comfortable and I don't know if I can trust her. So I really don't know what to do with her or our situation.

[N0help4u]

You need to break the ice some how,
No matter what you think or feel about her she is still your mother.
Start by not yelling at her and having an attitude with her.
Maybe she would like a closer relationship with you but feels like she can't get past your anger with her.
I know my one daughter, it always hurt me because she had a way of shutting me out with her yelling attitude.

[Clough]

Hi, lovingmonkey14!

N0help4u has given you some excellent advice, and I do hope that you return to address her.

What you want to hear, may not be the same as what you need to hear.

Thanks!

[lovingmonkey14]

You need to break the ice some how,
No matter what you think or feel about her she is still your mother.
Start by not yelling at her and having an attitude with her.
Maybe she would like a closer relationship with you but feels like she can't get past your anger with her.
I know my one daughter, it always hurt me because she had a way of shutting me out with her yelling attitude.

But every time I like want to be nice or try to be nice it just doesn't go as planned, cause when I'm nice my mom thinks I want something and that's just ridiculous and when I try to change for the better there's like something holding me back

[N0help4u]

but everytime I like want to be nice or try to be nice it just doesn't go as planned, cause when I'm nice my mom thinks I want something and that's just ridiculous and when I try to change for the better there's like something holding me back

You need to say ''Hey mom, I don't want anything and it hurts that just because I want to have a nice relationship with you you automatically accuse me of wanting something. How are we suppose to get anywhere when you feel this way and make me feel like there is no hope to be able to really talk about things with you.

[HelpinHere]

Well, she's being a mom, it sounds to me.
As hurt as you feel, I think you're overreacting. You have to think of everything she's sacrificed for you, and then try again.

Sorry N0help, but I don't think that is good advice. Some people can think that starting like that is going on the offense, and that could just make things worse.

Have you done anything to lose her trust?

Anyway, I suggest just saying "I love you mom." out of the blue. When she gives you a ride somewhere, say "I appreciate it." When she takes you to the dentist (Oh, the horror!) thank her for taking care of your health. Offer to go shopping with her, or carry in the groceries.
I agree with N0help on a different point, how old are you? Age can completely change what you could do to help her, but I'm sure you could think of some things yourself.

Don't expect anything in return. In fact, you want to do this when you are leaving or something, so she can't retaliate. Or even leave it in a note. Just by your spontaneous kindness toward her with no intention of anything in return (though you already get so much) will show her you are mature, and ready to have a relationship on a more personal level.