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Faithpal28 · Jun 29, 2009, 06:38 PM

You try to go out to meet one and it seems like they all know each other already. I went to a club and even a gay pride parade and it seemed like evey lesbian I saw had someone that they were with. I just don't get it do I attract a nice femme lesbian. I am not a hard butch, more like a soft AG. And I am just looking for a classy girly type of female. How to I attract this attention instead of me looking for them. How do I get them to look for me?:rolleyes:

Lesko04 · Jun 29, 2009, 08:51 PM

Maybe your looking to hard... as it ever occurred to you it or she could be closer than you know... relax and love and friendship will find you... the type of person you are looking for, don't just settle for the first available lesbian that comes your way... sit back and take your pick, there out there, watch and see, your princess will come

mudweiser · Jun 29, 2009, 09:28 PM

Why don't you start on making friends with other lesbians first, perhaps you'll be introduced to another female later on.

Be patient. If you become desperate you won't attract anybody you'd really like.

Just a suggestion.

Sarah

shazamataz · Jun 30, 2009, 02:31 AM

A lot of proud lesbian couples go to events such as the ones you mentioned. Now I am not saying that singles don't go to them as well but it just seems to usually be couples.

Try not to look too hard, go out to some clubs (as you have done) and particularly gay/lesbian ones if there are any in your area, take some friends along and concentrate on having fun!
I'd rather ask someone out who looks like they are having fun than scouring the room for a mate.

Holly23 · Jun 30, 2009, 02:45 AM

Exactly,go out and completely forget that your looking for someone.People are attracted to some one that looks like there having loads of fun, but don't take it to far no one wants to be stuck minding the drunk girl!

Faithpal28 · Jun 30, 2009, 02:41 PM

Thank you all for your answers. And I basically get the point. I just have to chill out. Its crazy though cause I have gay friends and straight friends and they all are in relationships so I just got a little lonely. But I totally understand what you guys are saying. Plus I have so much to work on in my life as far as my career and furthering my education that I know deep down inside I am not ready for the mate that I really want. So in the mean time I will just work on myself and just be happy and have fun. Plus I have to get some new gear even if I am not with anyone I want to at least feel attractive. So this will definitely be my project.

Ren6 · Jun 30, 2009, 03:27 PM

I snagged Mrs. Ren6 by placing a well written ad in the local alternative weekly paper. I described my hobbies and what I was looking for in a partner. I never would have met her in a club, as that's neither of our scenes. We've been together for ten years now, and I'm still crazy about her.

Craigslist is another option that you might try...

Good luck!

Faithpal28 · Jun 30, 2009, 06:07 PM

Originally Posted by Ren6

I snagged Mrs. Ren6 by placing a well written ad in the local alternative weekly paper. I described my hobbies and what I was looking for in a partner. I never would have met her in a club, as that's neither of our scenes. We've been together for ten years now, and I'm still crazy about her.

Craigslist is another option that you might try...

Good luck!

Yea the clubb scene is not my scene either. I might go out to a lounge once in a blue moon but it is no where I would think to find a partner I could take seriously.

Alty · Jun 30, 2009, 06:13 PM

How about a dating site?

There are lots of great ones out there.

If worse comes to worse at least you'll meet new people which will lead to meeting their friends and maybe your match is amongst them.

My hubby was an ex of a friend.

JoeCanada76 · Jun 30, 2009, 06:20 PM

I always say that the harder you look the longer it will take to meet someone.

You need to live your life not focusing on something that might not be the right timing right now. Keep busy and just have fun, and one day when you least expect it.

Somebody will be right under your nose and you will find that person that is right for you. Pushing it, and looking for it and not having patience will only make it longer.

Best of luck and I know when the right timing comes, you will notice that someone and there will be a match for you.

Joe

Fr_Chuck · Jun 30, 2009, 09:18 PM

Gay, straight or somewhere in between, it is always hard to find that special person.

They always seem to be already dating someone.

SuperDry18 · Jul 1, 2009, 07:36 AM

I think the less you look for someone the more they'll come to you without you even realising it! :)
Perhaps you need to try out going to new different places too!

I live in a small area, so me and my friends(and their gfs) always go elsewhere on nights outs! That's where I usually meet people.

shazamataz · Jul 1, 2009, 07:37 AM

Very true to both of you above ^

When I found my partner we were working together, he had a girlfriend and I had just got out of a bad relationship.

In a period of 6 months, he broke up with his girldfriend, my heart had healed and we just ended up going out for lunch...

the rest is history.