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    tchur1's Avatar
    tchur1 Posts: 8, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    May 4, 2009, 07:54 AM
    Openness with adult daughter
    My daughter e-mails me about once a week. However, she never calls. She has called twice in two months. The funny part is she called a few months ago to tell me she has a new cell phone and gave me her number. If I call her, I usually have to leave voice mail and she never returns the calls. I want to ask her if there is a reason she doesn't like to call or what? Would I be too controlling by asking her this question? It also upsets me that when she writes, she never includes a word or two to her Dad. It's like he doesn't exist in her life. Should I address this issue, too? I seem to always be hesitant in expressing my feelings because I don't want to upset her.
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
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    #2

    May 4, 2009, 08:03 AM

    Sure ask her and let her know you would appreciate if she call more often or at least answer the phone when you call.

    I know that I don't talk often to my mom on the phone because she got to the point she won't even call me or my sister because I am always busy and my sister spends the phone call talking to her husband and kids.
    I have to call her to talk to her and I rarely get the chance. But the more attempts my mom would make the more harder I would try to talk to her by returning her calls... at least that's me.
    jjwoodhull's Avatar
    jjwoodhull Posts: 1,378, Reputation: 239
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    #3

    May 4, 2009, 08:09 AM
    I don't know how old your daughter is, but younger people rely less on calling than other generations. Their communicating consists of emails, IMs, texting, etc.

    Perhaps you are not communicating effectively and she does not realize how you feel. When you leave a message, do you ask her to call you back?

    Tell her how you feel. Mention that her father misses her. Also, remind him that if he wants to speak to her, he should pick up the phone and call.
    jenniepepsi's Avatar
    jenniepepsi Posts: 4,042, Reputation: 533
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    #4

    May 4, 2009, 03:38 PM

    Perhaps she simply does not like talking on the phone, but has one in case of emergencys. This is me. I hate my phone. But I have one because I know someday I may NEED it.

    Ask her. There is nothing wrong with finding out her reasons :)

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