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    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
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    #41

    Apr 22, 2009, 11:18 PM

    First you need to know that all females aren't the same. Okay I can understand you have been treating poorly by some females in your past but let that emotional baggage go.

    Approach each new relationship with a fresh propective and give the person a chance. If you think your trust issues are going get in the way then don't enter a relationship and work on your issues.

    This is an contradiction " I want to be in love with someone, but i dont want to fall?". You don't know what can happen if you don't give it a chance. Being in love is grand but just make should you don't fall for all the wrong reasons. View the qualites of person your with and make sure they are what you want.

    Don't assume that all because she had more sexual partners she has more experience. You might be able to show her a thing or two when the chance arise. Be confident and let go the negativity.

    Take things slow. Get to know one another through dating. Talk, talk, and talk some more. Go out but don't forget to have a life by still maintaining a relationship with your friends. Don't let her be your everything because if she leaves you would have nothing.
    lighterrr's Avatar
    lighterrr Posts: 1,415, Reputation: 72
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    #42

    Apr 22, 2009, 11:40 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by musicianguybrum View Post
    Hey there,

    Right, so i went on my first date with this girl last week, and im seeing her again tomorro night...

    We got on really well and ended up making out, grinding and stuff like that, which is really not like me, both of us wanted to go all the way, but had to restrain ourselves, due to those unwritten rules about 1st dates..... (whoever wrote them, i hate you)

    But, im seeing her again tomorro as i said, and I do want to go further with her, but I also dont want to rush things, what would you say is the most we can do together tomorro in your opinions? we have been speaking to eachother for a month or so now, and really have clicked... We have chatted about sex and stuff like that, and I think she is more experianced than me in that department, but again, I dont want to rush things, but on the other hand, if i really like her, why wait? we get on great, have loads in common, and she finds my innappopriate and rubbish jokes hilarious...

    Thanks :)
    I think this original poster edited the original post :confused:.

    I say go with the flow and enjoy the evening, whatever happens happens let nature take its course, with protection of course.:D
    musicianguybrum's Avatar
    musicianguybrum Posts: 42, Reputation: -1
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    #43

    Apr 23, 2009, 02:22 AM
    I'm 22, and she is 22. Thanks for all the answers... I guess I jusdt need to force myself to take it slow then? How slow should I take it, and when do I know it's the right time to take things further?
    artlady's Avatar
    artlady Posts: 4,208, Reputation: 1477
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    #44

    Apr 23, 2009, 02:33 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by musicianguybrum View Post
    im 22, and she is 22. Thanks for all the answers.... I guess i jusdt need to force myself to take it slow then? how slow should i take it, and when do i know its the right time to take things further?
    Let her lead the way! Follow her lead and you will be fine. Chill :)
    oldenoughtoknow's Avatar
    oldenoughtoknow Posts: 61, Reputation: 13
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    #45

    Apr 23, 2009, 04:21 AM

    You could take a chaperone on your dates, For your interests as I'm from brum too, I'll come along and supervise and all it will cost is my drinks all night lol.

    Just play it cool and as its been said let her take the lead, just remember stay busy and don't make her the center of all your attention. But I hope it all goes well for you mate.
    Dare81's Avatar
    Dare81 Posts: 264, Reputation: 44
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    #46

    Apr 23, 2009, 05:25 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by musicianguybrum View Post
    im 22, and she is 22. Thanks for all the answers.... I guess i jusdt need to force myself to take it slow then? how slow should i take it, and when do i know its the right time to take things further?
    Holy sh--.If you two want to have then have sex, what is the big deal here, I donot see the whole point in talking it slow, what is that suppose to achieve.You said you two have been chatting and have a lot of stuff in common, I donot see how this is going to change even after having sex.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #47

    Apr 23, 2009, 09:15 AM
    Originally Posted by musicianguybrum
    im 22, and she is 22. Thanks for all the answers.... I guess i jusdt need to force myself to take it slow then? how slow should i take it, and when do i know its the right time to take things further?
    One of the things that happens I think when getting physical to soon is forming an emotional attachment that may stop you from seeing if there is any other thing in common you have besides just the lust.

    Lust will make us think the intense feelings, are something more, but when they wear off, what's left? Two strangers who are over the intense physical, and everything else they should have learned has been passed over. That's why you take it slow, so you can pay attention to each other on a higher level, and not just crash and burn, after the sex has died down.
    artlady's Avatar
    artlady Posts: 4,208, Reputation: 1477
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    #48

    Apr 25, 2009, 12:46 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
    Originally Posted by musicianguybrum


    One of the things that happens I think when getting physical to soon is forming an emotional attachment that may stop you from seeing if there is any other thing in common you have besides just the lust.

    Lust will make us think the intense feelings, are something more, but when they wear off, whats left?? Two strangers who are over the intense physical, and everything else they should have learned has been passed over. Thats why you take it slow, so you can pay attention to each other on a higher level, and not just crash and burn, after the sex has died down.
    Some relationships do last because of LUST :p
    I know it happens :cool:
    lighterrr's Avatar
    lighterrr Posts: 1,415, Reputation: 72
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    #49

    Apr 25, 2009, 12:55 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Dare81 View Post
    Holy sh--.If you two want to have then have sex, what is the big deal here, I donot see the whole point in talking it slow, what is that suppose to achieve.You said you two have been chatting and have a lot of stuff in common, i donot see how this is going to change even after having sex.

    Its all in good, go with the flow, have fun you are 2 consenting adults:D

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