[LRP-loves]

My Son has been married 7 months. He is 20 and she is 18. We were living very far away when they met and did not meet her until after they were engaged so we are kind of getting to know her as she has become part of our family. We Love her and don't want there to be any problems between us so I am really searching for an answer as to what to do. She has come to me when her and my son have had disagreements, and she dosen't want me to tell him. She told me that she was afraid she was pregnant and didn't want to upset him then, a few months later told me she was upset because she could not get pregnant. She told my daughter and myself that this young man had raped her then later made this same young man her friend on "My Space". She asked my daughter not to tell my son. She gets so upset and jealous over anyone that he knows or knew. She panics easily and when they are here with us (they live 8 hours away) sometimes we walk on pins and needles. I don't want them to feel like we don't want them here because we do but, I don't believe this is healthy and I am not sure how to deal with it. Someone else told me that they could tell she was trying to drive a wedge between me and my daughter. Our son rarely answers his phone, sleeps so much, and acts like he doesn't really like being around. What is your advice on what to do!!

[rockerchick_682]

Sounds like this marriage won't be lasting that long... hopefully. Tell your son what she's been saying and how she's a hypocrite. You can't let some 18-year old get in between you and your son. They both might be legally adults, but you're the only adult in this situation. This girl seems to be really un-healthy. You could leave them alone and let it play out, or you could tell him what's been going on. The way I see it she really shouldn't be telling you things that she can't say to her husband!

[jjb4060]

I think that she is stupid for telling her husbands mother to begin with. People do this to me and my husband all the time with the whole if I tell you don't tell them kind of thing, not knowing that we talk about everything. She sounds very immature and your son needs to know these things. If she can't tell him then its not real love. Me and my husband tell each other everything and if you are unable to do that in a relationship it will not work. Tell your son!

[posey_84]

I agree and disagree here. I think if you tell your son exactly what she has said it may drive a wedge between you and him because he is bound to take his young wife's side after all she does sound quite manipulative. I would speak to your son and tell him his wife has made you feel uncomfortable with something's she has been telling you and tell him exactly what your going to say to her. I would then talk to his wife and tell her your not happy with her coming to you with her problems with your son as you would rather stay impartial and not take sides. I would spk to your son first though because if you spk to her first she's going to go running to him telling him 'her version' of what you said. However like rocker chick said I don't think this marriage is going to last long because she sounds a little messed up to me but you want your son to feel he can come to you when it does all aprt so try not to make enemies by saying too much to him about his wife. Xxx