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hungtoronto · Jan 19, 2009, 11:45 AM

Originally Posted by NorthernNiceGuy

haha, well just enjoy the date and don't take it too seriously. no pressure. I say just give the mail to you friend and let him give it to her. No need to text, and definitely no need to text before a date. If she responds with whatever who knows how it will affect you for your big night out.

Just an update,

I gave my friend the mails and he gave them to her. She said thanks to him and didn't even talk to the guy lol oh well.

The date was fun but there wasn't any attraction. But I didn't feel like I had to run back to my ex because of this. I met this very attractive woman at the gym I workout at (the date was her friend). She's a single parent, I am not into single parent but we get along great as friend. We can talk for hours on the phone. We hangout and workout together, we jog together for 50 min everyday I can barely keep up with her at the gym. She kept my mind off the ex which I think is a good thing.

hungtoronto · Jan 21, 2009, 05:01 AM

Originally Posted by hungtoronto

Just an update,
I gave my friend the mails and he gave them to her. She said thanks to him and didn't even talk to the guy lol oh well.

My ex txt my friend yesterday and thank him for delivering the mail. She didn't even thank me. I could have thrown all her stuff out. He called me and tell me about it and didn't know how she got his number. It freaked him out. Well she used to have my cell phone and I figured that is how she got it.

Just when you thought you were doing so well then you hear something about the ex and it set u back a bit. I was ready to move on now this make me think again . Just venting.

ISneezeFunny · Jan 21, 2009, 08:38 AM

Don't think. Just do.

Think of it as you going for a jog and someone stops you to ask the time.

Pick up the pace.

Dare81 · Jan 21, 2009, 12:51 PM

Originally Posted by hungtoronto

My ex txt my friend yesterday and thank him for delivering the mail. She didn't even thank me. I could have thrown all her stuff out. He called me and tell me about it and didn't know how she got his number. It freaked him out. Well she used to have my cell phone and I figured that is how she got it.

Just when you thought you were doing so well then you hear something about the ex and it set u back a bit. I was ready to move on now this make me think again . Just venting.

Minor setback. You will feel better in a couple of days.

Good Luck

NorthernNiceGuy · Jan 22, 2009, 12:51 AM

Toronto,

Just be thankful that she is not contacting you to thank you. You don't need the hassle. You are doing no contact remember, the least she tries to reach out to you the better. And remember, you're not getting back with this woman, so does her not thanking you really mean anything... not at all.

Now that she has her mail look forward to an ex free life from now on. There is now no reason for you to talk to her.

Ps- Very impressed that you got your friend to give her the mail, be proud of yourself!

plonak · Jan 22, 2009, 01:49 PM

I broke No Contact today. I was browsing through Facebook friends and I saw a comment he left on one of our mutual friends saying something about him going on a double date and it going well and he likes the girl..

OUCH it felt like a knife stabbing in my stomach.. even though I told him to move on and that he can't be with me. IT STILL REALLY HURTS that he is moving on..

So, I sent him a nasty Facebook message, which did me no good..

This PROVES THAT BREAKING NO CONTACT CAN REALLY MESS UP YOUR RECOVERY AND YOUR DAY!!

Gosh I'm crying at my desk now..

NorthernNiceGuy · Jan 22, 2009, 09:30 PM

Originally Posted by plonak

I broke No Contact today. I was browsing through facebook friends and I saw a comment he left on one of our mutual friends saying something about him going on a double date and it going well and he likes the girl..

OUCH it felt like a knife stabbing in my stomach.. even though I told him to move on and that he can't be with me. IT STILL REALLY HURTS that he is moving on..

So, i sent him a nasty facebook message, which did me no good..

This PROVES THAT BREAKING NO CONTACT CAN REALLY MESS UP YOUR RECOVERY AND YOUR DAY!!!

Gosh im crying at my desk now..

Plonak!!

Ahhhhhh what are you doing! Well I am not going to say anything about it, you as much as anybody know you screwed up. That message you sent him probably did nothing but make him feel better. He knows he still has an effect on you. But like you said, you told him to move on and he is, so you should be happy for him. How bad does it look on you that you broke up with him and then get mad at him for moving on... not good.

Well I said I wouldn't say anything but it looks like I did. Just couldn't help myself from kicking you in the a$$. ;)

hungtoronto · Jan 22, 2009, 09:57 PM

Originally Posted by NorthernNiceGuy

toronto,

Just be thankful that she is not contacting you to thank you. You don't need the hassle. You are doing no contact remember, the least she tries to reach out to you the better. And remember, you're not getting back with this woman, so does her not thanking you really mean anything... not at all.

Now that she has her mail look forward to an ex free life from now on. There is now no reason for you to talk to her.

ps- Very impressed that you got your friend to give her the mail, be proud of yourself!

I never had a girl doing that to me that's all. I am trying to be nice and I don't even get a thank you. Maybe she know it would hurt me if she say thanks or she just try to get under my skin by thanking my friend. This is the first time I ever did NC. I am sure it will be easier next time.

Molecular · Jan 22, 2009, 10:24 PM

Don't put too much thought into it, Toronto. Women are very much different but if there's any one thing I learnt about my ex ever since she broke up with me it's that every time she contacts me she wants some form of validation, usually by making me do/say something and then just flat out not reply as some crazy scheme of superiority.

It's a wicked mindgame, ignore it! Move on with your life and be glad she didn't thank you, because a part of you would enjoy feeling like you were nice to her again and in the end, it would slow down the healing progress! Hang in there, man, everything gets better with time.

NorthernNiceGuy · Jan 22, 2009, 10:35 PM

Originally Posted by Molecular

every time she contacts me she wants some form of validation, usually by making me do/say something and then just flat out not reply as some crazy scheme of superiority.

So true, you start to catch on after awhile and don't give them the satisfaction. In the beginning my ex would contact me, get out of me that I still loved her or whatever than I would not hear from her for awhile until she needed some more reassurance that I still pined for her.

Great job toronto, keep it up!

plonak · Jan 22, 2009, 11:18 PM

Originally Posted by NorthernNiceGuy

Plonak!!!!!

Ahhhhhh what are you doing! Well I am not going to say anything about it, you as much as anybody know you screwed up. That message you sent him probably did nothing but make him feel better. He knows he still has an effect on you. But like you said, you told him to move on and he is, so you should be happy for him. How bad does it look on you that you broke up with him and then get mad at him for moving on... not good.

Well i said i wouldn't say anything but it looks like i did. Just couldn't help myself from kickin you in the a$$. ;)

Blahg.. I know.. I apologized and he's OK about it he feels bad that I'm sad, he hates seeing me upset and wouldn't be satisfied to know that I was jealous.. I just need to stop finding stuff out about him.. definitely needs to stop... I mean heck I got a boyfriend after I dumped him and my ex had to see pictures up of us and he was crushed.. so he understands the feeling..

YUCK!!

Boristheblade · Feb 1, 2009, 01:50 PM

I have been trying to stay away from my ex,got to the point where I was proud I got rid of anything and everything to do with him him in my life. The other day I was hassled all day by producers from a chat show. My ex called them (goodness knows why) and was doing a show about me. I was told they wanted to pick me up the night.

I think I win the competition for worst ex.

hungtoronto · Feb 8, 2009, 05:15 PM

Just an update,

I now have a new girlfriend, I knew her for a few months now, we were close friend but just recently hit it off. We have so much in comon it's great. She's totally the opposite of my ex. When I am with this new girl I didn't think about my ex one bit. Does that mean I am over her?

I broke up with my ex for a bit over 6 months now. For all of you doing NC you will get better and a new chapter will begin. Keep going guys, one day you will meet that special someone when you least expected.

Dare81 · Feb 8, 2009, 06:26 PM

Originally Posted by hungtoronto

Just an update,

I now have a new girlfriend, I knew her for a few months now, we were close friend but just recently hit it off. We have so much in comon it's great. She's totally the opposite of my ex. When I am with this new girl I didn't think about my ex one bit. Does that mean I am over her?

I broke up with my ex for a bit over 6 months now. For all of you doing NC you will get better and a new chapter will begin. Keep going guys, one day you will meet that special someone when you least expected.

Congrats on the new relatioship, but I think it might be alil too early for you I could be wrong.

Red flags in your post

Now have a new girlfriend, I knew her for a few months now, we were close friend but just recently hit it off. We have so much in comon it's great. She's totally the opposite of my ex??

Why are you comparing your ex to your girlfriend?

When I am with this new girl I didn't think about my ex one bit

What happenes whe nu are not with your girl do you think about your ex??

I hope this relationship works out for you. I really do.

Good Luck

hungtoronto · Feb 8, 2009, 06:43 PM

Originally Posted by Dare81

Congrats on the new relatioship, but i think it might be alil too early for you i could be wrong.

Red flags in ure post

now have a new girlfriend, I knew her for a few months now, we were close friend but just recently hit it off. We have so much in comon it's great. She's totally the opposite of my ex???

Why are u comparing ure ex to ure gf??

When I am with this new girl I didn't think about my ex one bit

What happenes whe nu r not with ure girl do u think about ure ex??.

I hope this relationship works out for you. I really do.

Good Luck

Hi Dare,

I am not comparing. I know where my feelings are. I haven't talk to my ex in 6 months. I think it's long enough to move on don't you think? I was with her for a year and a half. I am just saying she's different.

I don't even think about my ex when I am not with my new girl. A few months ago this would be true, I couldn't see anyone without thinking about my ex.

Right now everything seem to be good. I always like this girl but I never made a move since I didn't think I was ready.

Thanks for the advice Dare, how about you? How is NC going?

Dare81 · Feb 8, 2009, 07:07 PM

Originally Posted by hungtoronto

Hi Dare,

I am not comparing. I know where my feelings are. I haven't talk to my ex in 6 months. I think it's long enough to move on don't you think?. I was with her for a year and a half. I am just saying she's different.

I don't even think about my ex when I am not with my new girl. A few months ago this would be true, I couldn't see anyone without thinking about my ex.

Right now everything seem to be good. I always like this girl but I never made a move since I didn't think I was ready.

Thanks for the advice Dare, how about you? How is NC going?

I guess then you are truly over her.Congrats. Mine is still a roller coaster ride, most days are okay some are still hard, I still think about my ex everyday for 5 or 10 minutes I guess.Mine was a 8 year relationship, so its going to take a while I guess.
I am truly happy for you and I guess I won't be seeing yo o this website anymore.

Good Luck.

NorthernNiceGuy · Feb 8, 2009, 08:54 PM

Hey toronto,

All the best with this new relationship! I guess we can have our concerns about it, when just a couple weeks ago you were going through a rough patch. I had a lovely rebound, while I was with this new girl I didn't give my ex a second thought, but the feelings for this girl left me as fast as they came to me, and when it was over I just thought about my ex like the rebound had never happened. Not saying this is you, and I really do wish you all the luck, but these things do happen to the best of us.

As for myself I have hit a few rough patches, just about 10 months in now from a 4 year relationship ending. Nothing I am not used to and I know I will get over it soon, just boggles my mind that after this long I can still miss her like I do... However I have come to realize that its not her I really miss, but the idea of her and a relationship. And I think that's true for most of us.

Dare81 · Feb 8, 2009, 09:07 PM

Originally Posted by NorthernNiceGuy

hey toronto,

all the best with this new relationship! I guess we can have our concerns about it, when just a couple weeks ago you were going through a rough patch. I had a lovely rebound, while I was with this new girl I didn't give my ex a second thought, but the feelings for this girl left me as fast as they came to me, and when it was over I just thought about my ex like the rebound had never happened. Not saying this is you, and I really do wish you all the luck, but these things do happen to the best of us.

As for myself I have hit a few rough patches, just about 10 months in now from a 4 year relationship ending. Nothing I am not used to and I know I will get over it soon, just boggles my mind that after this long I can still miss her like I do... However I have come to realize that its not her I really miss, but the idea of her and a relationship. And I think that's true for most of us.

Its good to see that you are doing okay NNG.

ISneezeFunny · Feb 9, 2009, 09:15 PM

Here's my update. Long. Yes. Entertaining? Quite.

hungtoronto · Feb 9, 2009, 09:23 PM

Originally Posted by NorthernNiceGuy

hey toronto,

all the best with this new relationship! I guess we can have our concerns about it, when just a couple weeks ago you were going through a rough patch. I had a lovely rebound, while I was with this new girl I didn't give my ex a second thought, but the feelings for this girl left me as fast as they came to me, and when it was over I just thought about my ex like the rebound had never happened. Not saying this is you, and I really do wish you all the luck, but these things do happen to the best of us.

As for myself I have hit a few rough patches, just about 10 months in now from a 4 year relationship ending. Nothing I am not used to and I know I will get over it soon, just boggles my mind that after this long I can still miss her like I do... However I have come to realize that its not her I really miss, but the idea of her and a relationship. And I think that's true for most of us.

It's true that feeling is hard to predict. It may be a rebound. It may be not. Who knows but right now I feel good with the new girl. We'll see what happen. I think by the time this new relationship is over ( I hope not), my feeling for the ex is long gone.