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    rubypearl's Avatar
    rubypearl Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
    		  
    #1

    Jul 9, 2008, 01:06 PM
    Husband allows others to disrespect me
    I have been married for almost 15 years. In last the 2 to 3 yrs my husband has started being verbal abusive. But, to make along story short he allows his friends and family to say real hateful comments to me and has actually gone along with them . Then later will blame me for it and does not think it is a big deal. I have 3 children and really need help deciding what is the best thing for all of us. One other thing he has within the last 2-3 months starting getting rough and biting me during sex. What is up?
    mmmbopdoodle's Avatar
    mmmbopdoodle Posts: 44, Reputation: 1
    Junior Member
    		  
    #2

    Jul 9, 2008, 01:08 PM
    Not being rude or trying to make you think, but why did youget married? Were you in blissful love?
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
    Pets Expert
    		  
    #3

    Jul 9, 2008, 01:08 PM
    Have you talked to him about this, told him how you feel? That's the first step, if that doesn't work then consider counseling. This isn't right, but if you aren't standing up for yourself then you are accepting this behavior, it's time to speak up, let him know that this is not acceptable.

    Good luck.
    NowWhat's Avatar
    NowWhat Posts: 1,634, Reputation: 264
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    #4

    Jul 10, 2008, 07:55 AM
    Communication is key. You must talk to him and let him know how this makes you feel. Consider your words wisely so you will be heard. Don't talk at him.

    If you feel that you are at a breaking point - convey that to him and seek counseling. The worst thing you can do is to not say anything at all. Letting these feelings fester inside - well, it doesn't work. One of these days you may just blow up and your husband will be left scratching his head. So TALK to him.
    JuJuFruit's Avatar
    JuJuFruit Posts: 45, Reputation: 3
    Junior Member
    		  
    #5

    Jul 10, 2008, 08:13 AM
    Have you told your hubby that you don't like the rough sex? And the biting?

    He may be trying something new to spice things up. And if you are not vocal and let him know you don't like it, he may think you do, and will continue.
    MsMewiththat's Avatar
    MsMewiththat Posts: 854, Reputation: 136
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    #6

    Jul 10, 2008, 08:22 AM
    I agree with everything that was stated above and counseling is important at this point. Something is wrong that needs to be fixed. He may be holding some resentment or aggression towards you. Look in the other areas of your relationship. What's going on? Is there something wrong. Have you discussed this with him at all, calmly and rationally. Just ask him and tell him what you expect and that you expect it to stop. Then you should realistically expect it to stop, if it doesn't let him know the consequences and be prepared to deal with them yourself.
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