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sammi01 · Jan 17, 2008, 07:33 PM

OK guys I'm pretty sure my boyfriend is cheatin on me but I don't no how 2 catch him out any ideas I need 2 do it sneaky though because he nos I'm suspicious ideas will be a great help thanksxxxxxxx

twinkiedooter · Jan 17, 2008, 08:01 PM

Dear, if you are suspicious about him why would you want to "catch him"? To feel better knowing you are right? To actually be able to "see him do it" to someone else? Why do you think he is cheating on you for starters? Why don't you just confront him and see what he says?

Delow84 · Jan 17, 2008, 08:05 PM

If you start down the snooping road, and your wrong, it will hurt the relationship. Like twinkie said, confront him.

dollface_93 · Jan 17, 2008, 08:10 PM

Or just leave, why would you want to put yourself through that? If you think he is, he probably is, just move on and find yourself a real man!:)

George_1950 · Jan 17, 2008, 08:12 PM

You might try this: How would i catch my boyfriend cheating or tell if he is????? - Yahoo! Answers

twinkiedooter · Jan 18, 2008, 07:53 PM

Anytime you go snooping after another person, you will get yourself caught in the end. Are you looking to get really emotionally trashed once you know for sure after you catch him at it? No. Don't try and catch him. The emotional pain is too much. Just move on and learn to pick your men more carefully in the future.

Delow84 · Jan 18, 2008, 07:55 PM

Usually if your that sure, that you know you might find something by snooping, your right and should just leave. Finding out will hurt more. I made it a point to find out everything. And now I regret ever knowing anything.

ForeverZero · Jan 18, 2008, 10:13 PM

If you suspect he's cheating and his word isn't good enough for you, then your relationship is dead anyway.

eljay1103 · Jan 18, 2008, 11:04 PM

If you love him trust me you don't want to catch him... it is not a good feeling TRUST ME it will only hurt you more and more... always go with your woman's intuition... If you found something then what? Would you leave him? Those are something's you have to ask yourself b.c if your not ready to leave him then its not worth the heartache... and if your ready to leave him then you don't need any proof just go before you get in over your head with his lies. What's done in the dark comes out in the light...

browneyedgirl6640 · Jan 20, 2008, 04:26 PM

I feel your pain! I have been wondering if my husband has been cheating as well. He worked with this nasty piece of trash and at first he hated her because she is really a dirt bag! She even went as far as to stab her husband! See what a scum bag she is? Anyway, I'm not sure how they became talking, but they started hanging out a lot. He "helped" her and her husband and kids move, yada, yada... that's when the crap hit the fan so to speak. I did confront him and told him exactly how I felt about her, and he flat out told me that there was never anything going on between them. But deep down in my heart, I really believe that there was and possibly still is something going on. I don't want to leave because we have two beautiful daughters together and it would crush their world to leave. And I can't and won't live without them! It really hurts! We have been married for 11 years and to throw it all away for something as trashy as that! If there was a way for me to know for sure... I would do it! Knowing would be extremely painful, but not knowing is just as bad. I think that if you have suspicions, try to get down to the truth!

confused25 · Jan 20, 2008, 04:39 PM

You might not want to hear this but maybe the problem is with your insecurities. Has he given you any good reason to think that he is cheating on you? Remember, talking to other women is not cheating, being kind and friendly to other women is not cheating, and helping another woman out with some sort of work or school related project is not cheating. This is where trust comes into play and without that your relationship is good as dead.

Now, if he is consistently hanging out with a new women, is clearly spending less time with you, and goes out of his way to hang out with other people, then yes you have reason to be suspicious. If that's the case then it's better to confront him directly, snooping around will only make things worse. Listen, it's good to follow your intuition but at times its better to be rational because your intuition can be clouded by your insecurities.

sammi01 · Jan 21, 2008, 08:43 AM

I have asked him about it and he gets very defensive and I no him so this isn't rite I already think it and am sure of it I can't just leave him I have 2 find out because I'm not just letting him get away with it no chance in hell am I letting him make a fool of me and get away with it I will be able 2 just move on but not until I've made him pay I no it sounds harsh but oh well he's not getting away with it

s_cianci · Jan 21, 2008, 08:49 AM

Why do you want to "catch" him and why do you want to be "sneaky"? Why do you suspect he's cheating? If you really have cause to be suspicious then confront him directly in a matter-of-fact way and discuss your concerns with him. Then if your suspicions aren't relieved and you still truly believe he is cheating then dump him like a hot potato. A relationship isn't about a power struggle, although it seems that that's what you're interested in right now.

eljay1103 · Jan 21, 2008, 04:54 PM

Browneyed girl what would you do if he were cheating on you? Would you leave him? You just said you wouldn't do that to your children but its hard to stay when you finally do know something like that to be true... YOu guys are going to fight and make the girls scared... Its not a good feeling and you can't cover the sun with your hands but the best way is to figure it out with him before you go snooping and I only say this b.c I'm the queen of snooping I have seen things that I wish I could erase from my mind... I could sit here and tell her how to snoop but its only going to hurt her if its true...

chasinr33 · Jan 22, 2008, 09:53 AM

I know this is for other females, but sometimes it works both ways. If you have suspicions that he is cheating and he is showing all of the signs, chances are you are right. If you want to know for sure, make sure you are ready to find out. In other words, make sure you are ready to leave him or whatever it is you find as the best solution to this problem. In my opinion, finding out can be used as a source of closure, but not until you are ready to quit. I hope everything turns out OK for you, good luck!

talaniman · Jan 22, 2008, 11:16 AM

If your that adament, call "Cheaters", and put it on TV.