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ConfusedGrl · Jan 3, 2008, 02:42 AM

My friend casey went out with this guy brad, and he never respected her. He didn't treat her right at all. Never telling her were he is, ignoring her, not introducing her to his friends, never checking if she's OK.. things like that.. and he recently broke up with her. Now she wants to go and actually beg. Actually beg him 'Please please take me back'.

I told her a couple of things and I don't know if they're right:

1. If he wants to get back together, he should be the one to do it because he broke up with you

2. If you beg for him to take you back, he probably will and then treat you worse then he did before, cos he knows that no matter what you'll get back to him.

3. In my opinion it's not a good idea to get back together because since you don't trust him and think he'll cheat on you, and he doesn't respect you and by the way he's acting only wants to make out randomly with you whenever he feels like it, you're just telling him 'Go ahead, use me again'

And now I'm worried that I gave the wrong advice.. I tried to be as honest as I could.. and I'm worried cos now she's mad at me cos apparently by telling her that 'i pushed her into forgetting him'.. All I was trying to do was be a good friend. I know the both of them very well. Was this wrong?

simoneaugie · Jan 3, 2008, 03:31 AM

You're right. But if she does ask (beg) him to take her back, that's her decision. He sounds like someone who just wants to play around. He isn't ready to have a girlfriend. If Casey is ready for a boyfriend she should look around and choose someone different. She can pick from guys a little older than herself. Guys mature more slowly than girls. Too much older though and watch out. A year or two is probably safe.

talaniman · Jan 4, 2008, 02:42 PM

You tried, and if she won't listen, all you can do is be a friend, and let her cry on your shoulder when he breaks her heart, again.

EuRa · Jan 4, 2008, 03:05 PM

Originally Posted by talaniman

You tried, and if she wont listen, all you can do is be a friend, and let her cry on your shoulder when he breaks her heart, again.

Basically.

Chery · Jan 4, 2008, 03:31 PM

You did not get them to either fall in or out of a relationship, you just introduced. Not your fault that he turned out to be a jerk, and not your fault that she is weak and needy.

You tried to warn her afterwards, and it is still her choice to make further mistakes.

Being a friend means taking risks, especially if you are not a fine-weather friend who really cares. It might take her a while to realize this and you might have to wait for this friendship to mean something to her again, but you have my vote of confidence for meaning well, dear. Sometimes life just does not take the turns we prefer...

Take care and all the best - for me, you'd be friend worth keeping.