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ihatewestseneca · Dec 26, 2007, 10:54 PM

Well sneezy,
I do believe sometimes women can be generally confused, little do they know that they just might end up hurting themselves more than they think. I know my ex tried to keep me as a friend so I could be plan b, but I'm not going to let that happen, I'm not going to keep clinging to her and asking her to come back. If she wants to, she's going to have to send me a clear sign, and by then I figure it will all depend on how I feel, if I'm even available, and if I even want her back. Right now I think I would take her back... but I'm also thinking that I could really use a break too, so maybe not.
But yeah, now that I have a bit of a clearer head, (I know its only been 4 days, but I really think I'm thinking clearly) I honestly do think she's confused, her confusion may have been persuaded by some guy but I think she may be unclear about what she wants, after all she is young, (20) but I'm not much older, (21) yet I'm much more mature, and I know what I want.

Till then, ill let her do her own thing, and ill do my own. And hopefully by then I won't care whether she still wants me or not.

ihatewestseneca · Dec 28, 2007, 11:43 PM

Broke no contact... meeting with her Sunday, she wants to give me my christmas present, and church. Back to day 1... wow, I felt so good... and now I'm back to square one and I want to call her and tell her that she is making a mistake! She told me that she wants so bad for it to be a mistake (going out with the other guy), and told me that she misses me a lot on the phone today... why are girls so confusing...

ISneezeFunny · Dec 29, 2007, 01:33 AM

WANTS for it to be a mistake.

... if she were a woman, I'd slap her.

Just kidding. What a dumb thing to say. It's like me... waking up in the morning, grabbing a bowl of cereal and going... MAN, I WISH THIS TASTED BAD...

... why? Just don't eat it.

ihatewestseneca · Dec 29, 2007, 02:37 AM

I know right? Maybe I should slap her, lol

talaniman · Dec 29, 2007, 06:34 AM

Don't let this degrade into a tearfest. The sooner its over, the better.

ihatewestseneca · Jan 23, 2008, 05:31 AM

Ugh, so I did something stupid again and went on my ex's Facebook. I knew it was just going to hurt me even more but, I don't know... I'm an idiot... Anyway, she broke up with me because of "long distance" but I'm thinking that that was BS because she has some other guy. I checked her inbox and she sent him these really long messages about how she's never been so in love with anyone before, and how she can't wait to be married to him. (mind you, they've been together a month) It just freakin hurts because she said those same words to me, but not a month in. And now I'm thinking, how long has she not meant it to me?

I guess there is kind of a plus side to snooping, at least ill stop kidding myself into thinking that she'll want to come back. But it just gets me thinking, She's the one that said all that stuff to me, but she broke up with me... could he really be that much better than me? I'm pretty sure she was happy for the 2 years we spent together.

On a side note... how crazy is this--> When she came back for thanksgiving break, she was all over me and telling me that she can't wait till we're married and all that fun stuff, then she goes back to school for only 10 days, and then comes back home for xmas break and breaks up with me her first day back. It only took that guy 10 days to make her completely forget about me... what a piece of work.

Anyway, is she crazy for feeling that way towards him so soon? Or is that a normal type of thing when girls break up with someone and then immediately enter another relationship?

ihatewestseneca · Jan 23, 2008, 05:57 AM

And I just want to add, that it feels mad good to write that stuff down. I think it'll feel even better if at least one person writes back that she is indeed batsh!t crazy.

ISneezeFunny · Jan 23, 2008, 06:25 AM

Damn. That girl's rebounding more than charles barkley.

ihatewestseneca · Jan 23, 2008, 06:39 AM

Originally Posted by ISneezeFunny

damn. that girl's rebounding more than charles barkley.

Haha, so that's kind of typical?

ISneezeFunny · Jan 23, 2008, 06:50 AM

A girl's in a long distance relationship... finds a new guy.. and within months she's talking about marriage + love? Yeah... that's a rebound. Although, don't get me wrong... some rebounds actually do work out. There's a forum that says "My ex is now getting married" or something like that, in which a lot of rebounders end up together in the long run. However, the whole... love... marriage talk... it's a way of replacing you with another dude.

mafiaangel180 · Jan 23, 2008, 07:02 AM

If the person in question doesn't value themselves as a single person and thinks they need to latch onto someone else to make them happy then.. yeah it's normal. But why would you want someone like that anyway? Feel glad to know you aren't with someone so incomplete.

And as for you, lol, stop snooping! It's not healthy. Besides, a lot of times when you find something, you still end up doubting it anyway. You need to just let it all go. And then, go work on yourself, deal with any issues you might have, so whenever you meet someone wonderful, you don't wind up snooping through her stuff...

Good luck with everything.

ihatewestseneca · Jan 23, 2008, 07:10 AM

Originally Posted by mafiaangel180

If the person in question doesn't value themselves as a single person and thinks they need to latch onto someone else to make them happy then..yeah it's normal. But why would you want someone like that anyway? Feel glad to know you aren't with someone so incomplete.

And as for you, lol, stop snooping! It's not healthy. Besides, a lot of times when you find something, you still end up doubting it anyway. You need to just let it all go. And then, go work on yourself, deal with any issues you might have, so whenever you meet someone wonderful, you don't wind up snooping through her stuff...

Good luck with everything.

I've been doing good up until now, then you know, an idle mind... I get to wondering... then I hate myself for snooping, then I just confirm how right I was about her. Another one of her reasons was that she needs to "find herself" and I told her that she's not going to find herself with someone else... but yeah, if that's how she is... whatever... women... I'm getting more and more used to single life everyday anyway, I don't think I want another serious relationship until I'm finished, or close to finished with college.

Romefalls19 · Jan 23, 2008, 07:23 AM

Yea, I enjoy the single life as well, but nights get so lonely anymore, that's when I have the urge to text my ex which is a bad thing. I used to snoop just like you but then I found out an interesting thing.. Ignorance is bliss, I don't know what she is doing and who she is doing it with. I know in time I'll feel better but this how I feel right now.. And it sucks

mafiaangel180 · Jan 23, 2008, 07:24 AM

Originally Posted by ihatewestseneca

I've been doing good up until now, then you know, an idle mind... I get to wonderin... then i hate myself for snooping, then i just confirm how right i was about her. Another one of her reasons was that she needs to "find herself" and i told her that shes not gonna find herself with someone else... but yeah, if thats how she is... whatever... women... I'm getting more and more used to single life everyday anyway, i dont think i want another serious relationship until im finished, or close to finished with college.

Don't beat yourself up for the snooping, just find other things to think about so you don't do it anymore. Now that you know she's pretty much not good for you, try to move on. The single life isn't so bad. I'm actually liking it. :) I don't have to deal with any drama. Ugh, I hate drama.

talaniman · Jan 23, 2008, 07:32 AM

I have to be honest, as finding out things on the electronic grapevine, which may or may not be true, is hardly snoopping, but is a clear sign you have a ways to go in your healing, and maybe need to work harder. Typically LDR's only work, when both are committed for the long term, and obviously she wasn't with you, ( doubt she is now ) so be glad she isn't taking up your time anymore. You really need to see her realistically though, as we who have read your thread, see she is a needy flake, and think your stuck, and would love to apply the boot, in person to unstuck you. Good vent though. 10 points for that.

DMBacoustic · Jan 23, 2008, 08:16 AM

Don't feel bad about "snooping". I've been apart from my ex for almost 2 months and every now and then I still have those urges. And yea it doesn't feel great when you see stuff. But I had the exact situation you are in. The next week after we broke up my ex was back to HER ex boyfriend talking the day away in emails and stuff like that. Another girl who just needs someone to latch onto. Like everybody has been saying though, in time you'll realize that's NOT the kind of person you want, and in the long run when your years older and smarter you'll thank the day the girl left and brought her problems to somebody else.

Romefalls19 · Jan 23, 2008, 08:23 AM

Yea, personally I think it's better not knowing anything about them... That's just me though, anytime I feel depressed I toss on the eternal song "Every rose has it's thorn" and the last part of the song is just wow.. Everything is so blurry right now, and I am really actually lost as to what to do or think

DMBacoustic · Jan 23, 2008, 09:08 AM

You know lately after I'll have one of those episodes where you want to text your Ex or you want to write them a letter or some crap immediately afterwards I'll just think about how much of a waste of time it really is. I mean think about it; we're sitting there pining for somebody who could probably care less, and in a few years from now we'll look back and think holy crap why did I waste my time. Coming to this uhm realization has really helped in the whole process. I'm not saying its not normal to do any of this, I'm just saying think about what you're doing and what you could spend all that time on instead of sitting around being miserable.

ihatewestseneca · Jan 23, 2008, 09:10 AM

Yeah, when I have trouble getting to sleep. (its been a problem before the break-up as well) Music really helps... but I find that I still have to skip some songs, like songs that me and ex listened to a lot.
But anyway, classes started up for me again today, and I actually just got back from one. I made sure I sat with cute girls, and I'm pretty sure they all love me, Im so glad I'm such a charismatic bastard

Romefalls19 · Jan 23, 2008, 09:14 AM

Yea I have friends that "want me to meet this girl" and "you gotta meet this one" stuff like that. Which I am open to that one ha ha... I have 3500 songs on my IPOD and somehow every time I play it, one of the first 5 songs is me and my ex's song we used to relate how we felt when she went to NC when we first got together. "Stay where I can see you" by The Starting Line... I really loved that song, even before we got together and now I can't listen to it