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    alicapalzi's Avatar
    alicapalzi Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Sep 15, 2007, 12:56 AM
    I AM a child but my subject is nowhere to be found!
    At school the other kids are always talking about boys,crushes,pashes, all that stuff that gets talked about in grade six. I'm so confused. I don't feel like talking about that stuff yet. Now I'm asking you because I can't find any one to ask. What age do you have boyfriends? Like, hang out, kiss, and talk and be proper couples? I don't know. I mean I've had crushes and all but when should I actually tell the guy that I like him and be a couple? I mean, what age? 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14,15, 16 ,17 ,18? I need to know from you. And please don't say when you feel ready. That's all people have said. Please. I need to know. It's very important.
    Clough's Avatar
    Clough Posts: 26,677, Reputation: 1649
    Uber Member
     
    #2

    Sep 15, 2007, 01:14 AM
    Kids like to brag about things that they would like to do and think that they are doing. I know that I did. Please don't feel pressured to do anything that someone else might be doing. You will have your time to decide and do as you wish.

    People generally start dating and being serious about such a thing when they are in their later teen years. There are many things that need to be considered before embarking on any kind of relationships.

    I am sure that others will be along to answer your question also.
    valgal's Avatar
    valgal Posts: 13, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #3

    Sep 15, 2007, 01:22 AM
    I'd say that age 13 would be a good age to start getting into real relationships, because then you are properly a teenager and would most likely be able to handle it. If all of your friends are talking about all of that and you don't really feel like talking about it, then maybe you should tell them it makes you feel uncomfortable. Don't feel pressured into anything your not ready for yet. Also, not getting into relationships too early is a good thing, some girls just rush into it and end up regretting it later. So I think you can go out with guys at your age, I just think that waiting to get really "serious" until your at least a teen, is a very wise decision. Hope that helped!
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
    Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
     
    #4

    Sep 15, 2007, 03:58 AM
    The problem here is that there is no one hard and fast answer. A big factor here is your parents and what THEY feel is proper for you.

    I agree that I would not allow my dtr (did not allow) to start dating until 13. But if it doesn't feel right to you at that time, then wait. What you shouldn't do is look at this as a cutoff. Like a switch flipping at a certain age. Social relationships is a progression that starts as a toddler.
    tawnynkids's Avatar
    tawnynkids Posts: 622, Reputation: 111
    Senior Member
     
    #5

    Sep 15, 2007, 08:31 AM
    I am sorry guys I have to disagree with dating at 13. Not only are you not mature enough at that age to understand the purpose and design of dating you are not mature enough of to deal with the possible repercussions of going too far. "Dating" can quickly get out of hand because there are emotions involved that I do not believe you are capable of understanding or dealing with at 13. Those emotions can lead to very poor decisions that can wind you up being a parent at an all too early age. Then you may end up posting here as many do with something like "14 and pregnant what do I do?" Not only can you end up pregnant, you could end up in a date rape situation or worse. A 13 year old is simply not able to handle themselves and should not have to but it happens all too often.

    Right now your job is to focus on school and learn the vital things you need to know to succeed after school. I think it is OK to go on "group dates" at 15. But no being alone with a boy, that's just asking for trouble. Your teen years are for really learning to develop social relationships. The kind of relationships that may last for years and to those who you are not related to. Group dating allows for the chance to develop those skills in a safer way. Develop the friendships with guys and girls right now. Learn the differences betweens those friendships and the skills to cope with them. During a friendship you get to see the kinds of qualities a person has and what kind of qualities you want for yourself in a boyfriend. Building a real friendship should be the first step to having a relationship with a guy anyway. And building a real friendship with trust and true caring with someone takes time.

    I would save actual dating or getting serious with a boy until you are at least 17. A 17 year old should really be determining where they want the rest of their lives to go. Deciding on a college, or if they want to go to college, what kind of career they want, starting to decide when they may want to get married/have kids, live etc. I really feel you need to figure those things out so you can decide when and how a serious boyfriend will fit into all those plans/goals.

    Take it slow. Be a kid. That's your job right now. Life will get plenty serious and complicated soon enough. Give yourself a chance to mature some more before you start putting yourself into serious situations that will require you to make mature decisions that can affect the rest of your life. Dating may sound innocent and fun but it really is serious business.

    I know this was long but I hope it was a little helpful and gave you some things to think about at least. Good luck.
    nicespringgirl's Avatar
    nicespringgirl Posts: 1,237, Reputation: 187
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    #6

    Sep 15, 2007, 10:09 AM
    At school the other kids are always talking about boys,crushes,pashes, all that stuff that gets talked about in grade six. I'm so confused. I don't feel like talking about that stuff yet.
    I didn't join those topics either, you don't have to, just smile if you hear they are talking about it.
    Now I'm asking you because I can't find any one to ask. What age do you have boyfriends? Like, hang out, kiss, and talk and be proper couples? I don't know. I mean I've had crushes and all but when should I actually tell the guy that I like him and be a couple? I mean, what age? 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14,15, 16 ,17 ,18? I need to know from you.
    I never had one, haven't done any thing physical to anyone.
    It's common to have crush, when I was younger I often found Keanu Reeves a good looking guy. :DWhen I grow older, truly, I don't judge anyone by their outlooks any more.
    And please don't say when you feel ready. That's all people have said. Please. I need to know. It's very important.
    Okay, focus on your school make real friends ans stay drama free.

    Good luck.

    PS you don't have to do stuff everyone else is doing. You will see what happen to them later, just watch... learn from others' mistake.
    And talk to your parents, I believe most of them love their kids and will give the best advice along the way.
    Cutiebootie098's Avatar
    Cutiebootie098 Posts: 7, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #7

    Sep 15, 2007, 01:15 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by alicapalzi
    At school the other kids are always talking about boys,crushes,pashes, all that stuff that gets talked about in grade six. I'm so confused. I don't feel like talking about that stuff yet. Now I'm asking you because I can't find any one to ask. What age do you have boyfriends? Like, hang out, kiss, and talk and be proper couples? I don't know. I mean I've had crushes and all but when should I actually tell the guy that I like him and be a couple? I mean, what age? 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14,15, 16 ,17 ,18? I need to know from you. And please don't say when you feel ready. That's all people have said. Please. I need to know. It's very important.
    Hi Im in the 6th grade, too. I like to talk about boys. I think you should start seriously dating at around 16. But you can still have a boyfriend IN 6TH GRADE as long as you respect yourself and don't do anything you will regret later.
    nya's Avatar
    nya Posts: 55, Reputation: 8
    Junior Member
     
    #8

    Sep 15, 2007, 08:31 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by alicapalzi
    At school the other kids are always talking about boys,crushes,pashes, all that stuff that gets talked about in grade six. I'm so confused. I don't feel like talking about that stuff yet. Now I'm asking you because I can't find any one to ask. What age do you have boyfriends? Like, hang out, kiss, and talk and be proper couples? I don't know. I mean I've had crushes and all but when should I actually tell the guy that I like him and be a couple? I mean, what age? 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14,15, 16 ,17 ,18? I need to know from you. And please don't say when you feel ready. That's all people have said. Please. I need to know. It's very important.
    Although you don't want to hear this answer, it really is when you are ready to do those things. How can anyone tell you when to feel something or when to tell someone that you feel something for them? It's only when you're ready. I'm a twin and at the time when she was interested in boys, I wasn't. She became interested in boys around the sixth grade while I became interested around the eighth grade. No two people are the same so to give you a specific answer is tough. But if I had to give you a definite answer I would say girls and boys generally start getting interested in each beginning in the sixth grade and by seventh grade hormones are in full swing for most teenagers.
    cerulean's Avatar
    cerulean Posts: 110, Reputation: 5
    Junior Member
     
    #9

    Sep 15, 2007, 08:35 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by alicapalzi
    I mean, what age? 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14,15, 16 ,17 ,18? I need to know from you. And please don't say when you feel ready. That's all people have said. Please. I need to know. It's very important.
    28:D
    LearningAsIGo's Avatar
    LearningAsIGo Posts: 2,653, Reputation: 350
    Survivor
     
    #10

    Sep 17, 2007, 08:13 AM
    I was the same way. Most of my friends started that kind of thing early (11, 12 years old) but I wasn't interested. Instead, I had friends that were boys and had 10 times more fun that my female friends did while they were too worried about dating them instead. Some of my friends who acted that way young, weren't really interested but only trying to act like their older sisters or cousins.

    I didn't start liking anyone till 13... but I waited till I was 14 (almost 15) for a real boyfriend.
    JamieLynn's Avatar
    JamieLynn Posts: 55, Reputation: 5
    Junior Member
     
    #11

    Sep 26, 2007, 11:43 AM
    Ok hunny, I was 12 when I had my first relationship but its different for everyone, you shouldn't be worried about it. You don't have to push for a relationship a lot of times they happen on there own. I'm sure you know when a boy likes you without him even telling you and boys can tell if you like them too. If your not sure about when to start dating just wait for it to happen on its own. But do ask your parents first what age is OK to start dating OK

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