[Cheeky]

I'm totally in love with my boyfriend, we haven't been dating long but I snooped into his email account yesterday and I found out that he was bisexual. I don't know how to ask him about this I want to truth though. Now he's back in England too and I'm suppose to meet up with him next month. He tells me that he misses me and love me a lot too. I'm afraid if I tell him what I know on the phone he would never speak to me again. What do I do to not lose him forever? Thx :confused:

[Chi2005]

Though this shouldn't need to be said, you should not have been reading his email! That said, now you know something that you shouldn't. How do you feel about his being bisexual? If it doesn't bother you, then there should be no problem and you should feel no need to let him know that you know. If it does bother you, then you should not continue seeing this person. His preferences will not change for you or anybody else. In any case, I don't advise that you tell him you did this. I know if I found out someone I was seeing was snooping around my stuff, they'd be history.

[lickemlolly]

So he is bisexual... now you know... but he is with you so that shouldn't change the way that you feel about this guy... if you care about each other then that shouldn't matter... you can't judge a book by its cover...

[Wildcat21]

YOU HAVE TO KNOW!!

I would - "I get this weird vibe that you might be bi?" "It's Ok if you are?"

Even if it isn't... you need to know... especially if you ARE uncomfortable with it.

If you are cool about it hen it's OK - he should be cool about it.

CAUTION!! I don't know ONE guy who is bi. They are usually 100% gay. He may see you more as 'friend'. Just my opinion.

Does anyone else know a bi guy? I doubt it.

[turtlegirl]

You ask "What do i do to not lose him forever?" Why are you afraid you are going to? Because you're afraid that he'll find out you broke his trust, or because you think if he's bi he won't be satisfied with only you? Or is there something else?

[Cheeky]

I don't want to lose him because ibroken his trust. He gave me the password but I guess he didn't expect me to use it. But shouldn't he have told me he's bi. I know he loves me but I'm also scared that he might want someone else too. I don't know this is such a confusing situation. I guess I will talk to him when he gets home and tell him what I did and what I know and pray everything is all right. Or do you think I should pretend I know nothing? And this week I realize I love him so much that I don't care that he's bi. But I don't really understand how they think so I just need explanations I guess.

[trulydiva]

I wonder why you were snooping in the first place? You must have had some suspiscion that something was wrong... Anyway, this is something that you definitely needed to know, for your own health and safety, if nothing else. Look, I had a (notice HAD) a cousin that considered himself bisexual. He liked women somewhat, but definitely had a passion for men. He and his lover are now deceased. He wanted to have children, he came from a big family and wanted his own biological children, but ultimately he died from aids. I also have another cousin who is much older than myself. He is openly gay, has been for years BUT managed to have 5 children with 5 different women, has now several grandchildren and greatgrandchildren and the most dysfunctional family you will ever hear about. I won't bore you, I say all this to say, he did a lot of damage to women in his younger years while he was trying to figure himself out... and my younger cousin (now deceased) dated women only because he wanted to have children... he told me that himself. Be careful... I don't believe in bisexuality for the long term. I will tell you like my mother told me many years ago, "if a man is into drugs or other men, forget it. You have nothing that can compete with either of those passions, so let it go."
Take care and God Bless.

[Wildcat21]

I AGREE 100%!! You have to know. You don't want to be sharing partners.

I would not say you snooped - just say you have suspicisions - gut feeling.

[Cheeky]

I've been talking to people about this and everyone has their own opinions and so from that I guess the only way I can deal with all of this is just talk to him instead of guessing. There is only a week left before he goes home. So I'll let you guys know what happens. Thanks so much. I hope he doesn't turn out to be gay one day. It's so hard cause I love him so much. Thanks again.

[fredg]

Hi,
Maybe a little late to reply to this. But, as others said, talk with him. Be honest and open. Find out what he is all about.
If you are really in love with him, it will be best for both of you.
If he is really bisexual, save yourself a lot of heartache later on, and find someone else. You found him, and can find another you will fall in love with, too.
Best of luck,
fredg

[Cheeky]

I'm kind of scared cause I really love him and want to be with him. Being bisexual doesn't automatically make him gay right?