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Full Member
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Jul 17, 2007, 01:40 PM
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Originally Posted by starlady
iight i understand and dont jump on me! what i am saying is that no matter wat advice we give, because in the end she can be like "i "love" him and im going to do watever i want", she's go'n 2do what she wants. if anything, she's needs to talk 2 someone she trust and it doesn't have to be her parents just an older family memeber. i would wna to protect her if i was her mother but put'n her in a cage and straping her to a seat won't help because she's going to rebel if she really wants to be his girlfriend. But NO i understand in a mother perspective that she shouldnt be dating a 16 year old
Nothing a good smack on the a** or a girls home won't take care of. When you as a parent can't lay the law down in your own home with an 11 year old, something is wrong with your skills as a parent.
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Junior Member
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Jul 17, 2007, 04:15 PM
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I fail to see how you can seriously love someone who's 5 years older than you when you're 11. I think you're just having a crush. Two very different things. A crush is like being visually attracted. Love is more complex and hard to understand at a young age without experience. 21 dating a 26 is one thing but 11 dating a 16 is well.. simply put... wrong.
There are many cases where the guy 5 years older is in "love" with the girl, and then just uses her for sex. This is just online advice from people with experience. Keep in mind that we don't know anything about this guy, but ask yourself.
"How will I live knowing that I was used when others told me it was going to happen."
All this may sound unfair and unjust to you because you're 11 and you "can't make your own choices." Yeah it sucks we've all been there, but there is a reason. Age comes with experience, and knowledge. It's not just a number. Everyone who's giving you advice is an individual who knows what they're talking about because of what they went through in life.
Enjoy your life while your young because now it is simple and fun. When you're older you will regret not being 11 and wanting to grow up to soon. Trust me on this one :). Have fun and don't worry about relationships now. Remember, sometimes your heart is like a child that needs to be put in place by the mind.
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Junior Member
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Jul 19, 2007, 12:16 PM
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Honey, my daughter is only 2 years younger than you and I won't tolerate dating until she's 16. And I'm sorry, but at 11, trust me, you really don't know what love is. It's more like lust. Please wait! I know it sounds like fun and 'adult like', you're not. You're still a child.
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New Member
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Aug 4, 2007, 08:50 PM
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I think its up to you. Although Cation: coming from an 11 year old guy you should trust me, don't get too close or he will get annoyed and dump you, and don't get used to it because he might feel weird about dating an 11 year old and leave for someone his own age.
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New Member
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Aug 4, 2007, 09:06 PM
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I am 18, and at 16 neither me nor any of my friends had interest in someone that young. I'm sorry, but even if his intentions are noble, something about this just doesn't sit right. I'm not sure if you really love him or if you just think that you do, but either way you should wait because you are living in two completely different worlds
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New Member
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Aug 4, 2007, 09:59 PM
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Yes you can I know that you said you do not want to have sex, but if you ever decide to make sure he has not turned 18 yet so that he does not get in trouble you will not get in trouble no matter how old he is
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Junior Member
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Aug 4, 2007, 10:11 PM
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Please take the time to read this.
5 years difference? Sorry, but at 11, you really do not know what love is. He must be after only one thing if he is willing to want a relationship with someone still in elementary school. And that one thing is sex. I am not trying to rain on your parade here, I just don't want you to give yourself away to someone who is only after one thing, no matter WHAT he says. He will say he loves you, he will say everything he thinks you want to hear. So in the long run, he can get in your pants. Sorry babe, but it is not a good idea to date someone at your age. Especially a 16 year old who is horny and wants sex and doesn't care who it is from. I do not even know if I have much more to say, because it isn't like you are going to listen to us anyway. You are going to say "no they're wrong, I really DO love him and I want to spend the rest of my life with him." No hun, in about 10 years if you are still with him, give us a call and tell us how wrong we were.
What do your parents say about this ? Do they even know ? Or do they think you are going to your friends house, which may be his little sister? I am sorry I am coming down so hard on you, but this is serious and now is not the time to ruin your life. If you do decide to date this boy, and your parents are okay with that, DO NOT have sex with him, save yourself for marriage. I am sure all of us have made the mistake of giving ourselves away to someone we don't even talk to anymore.
Give this time and thought because you may think you know what you want, but you still have your WHOLE life ahead of you.
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New Member
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Aug 4, 2007, 10:18 PM
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You may not want to listen but oh well I will say it anyway given his age he is probably only after what is between your legs and he will say anything to get what you have that he wants and just think about this if he does you like I am saying how many others could he have done the same way
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New Member
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Aug 5, 2007, 02:22 AM
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I'm 14 and never dated anybody.I think that I am still young but I would date somebody if he's OK and if I know him for about a month yeah.But at the age of 11 you shouldn't!! Your still way to young to date even an 11 year old guy! He's 16 and you think he is kind and gentle but you might find him very different.If I was you I wouldn't date him.I know you're thinking that you have what you want and nothing can be better but when you hang out with a group and laugh and have a good time I'm sure you'll have a MUCH BETTER time(from my experience)... 16 year old guys just don't want an 11 year girl to fall in love with.Get away and enjoy your teenage years... you'll have a lot time to love!
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Junior Member
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Aug 5, 2007, 05:05 PM
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At 11/16 the age difference is HUGE. 30/25 no big deal. If he doesn't now, he will very soon want to have sex with you. Ready to be a mother?
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Ultra Member
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Aug 5, 2007, 06:17 PM
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I think you scared of me.
U know what, every time I read somethine like this, I wonder what do your parents answer about your question?Will they be fightened?
I personally think that's not true love, too early to date no matter how old the guy is.
It's just too early.
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Junior Member
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Aug 5, 2007, 06:24 PM
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Originally Posted by Pook_Myster
Oh my, oh my, oh my.......this is scary....
What happened to the age of innocence? I am 23, and I can remember being 11 not so long ago.....I was playing with Barbie and watching Saturday morning cartoons....boys were the last thing on my mind, and it wasn't until around this time when I saw the family dog mating with the neighbours that I asked about sex.....without that incident it probably wouldn't have even entered my mind!
This is wrong on a couple of levels - One.....An 11 year old should NOT be thinking about relationships, sex, love.....and a 16 year old should have no interest in an 11 year old!
There is NO way this relationship should be allowed to begin.
There is also laws that prohibit this from happening for example in some states the age of consent is 16 so it could be considered statuatory rape if you were to have sex, there is also the romeo and julet law in Georgia.
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Ultra Member
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Aug 5, 2007, 06:28 PM
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All I can say is at age 11 I was playing with my Little Pony and Barbie. Sure I thought my brothers friends were so cool and so cute being that they were 14. But they wanted nothing to do with an annoying 11 year old.
This guy is bad. What does your mom think about this? I imagine since you are so mature to date a 16 year old that you are discussed this with your parents?
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Full Member
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Aug 5, 2007, 06:36 PM
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A 16 year old has serious problems if they really want to date an 11 year old. The age gap is way way to big, 11 year olds should not date regardless.
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New Member
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Aug 5, 2007, 09:40 PM
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[QUOTE=answers_16]yes you can but it is not a good idea to have sex until marriage
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Ultra Member
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Aug 5, 2007, 09:51 PM
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[QUOTE=answers_16]
Originally Posted by answers_16
yes you can but it is not a good idea to have sex until marriage
You are actually saying its okay? What interest could a 16 year old possibly have in an 11 year old? When I was 11, I was in 5th grade, when I was 16, I was a sophomore in high school. That doesn't sound like a huge gap to you? The age is bad enough, but the school year gap is huge too! Do you think it would sound good for a sophomore going around telling everyone his girlfriend was in 5th grade?
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Junior Member
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Aug 6, 2007, 11:20 PM
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k, 11 year olds don't play with dolls anymore, believe me. I know this because I'm pretty close to your age hunn, and you have to go what with your heart tells you, I've always been intrested in older guys, if you go out with him, make sure your safe and one I was taking to an older guy, it got into too much, if he ever wants to make you do something you don't want to do, then walk away form him right away k? I hope this is helpful.
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Uber Member
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Aug 6, 2007, 11:22 PM
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You shouldn't date.
That simple.
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New Member
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Aug 7, 2007, 10:19 AM
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Im 22 years old and you know how many times I tought I was in Love once too many... I think you should not date him first because he is 5 years older than you and apparently he is in high school and trust me he is not thinking just about holding hands and kissing every now and then... I think you should give yourself time... pretty soon when you are 15 or 16 you can start dating.
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New Member
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Aug 9, 2007, 01:12 PM
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You should never be thinking about guys. You should be playing outside with your friends
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