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jasmin_flower69 · Jul 6, 2007, 10:12 PM

Hey. My sister in law's boyfriend has been living with her for about a year and a half. He's had a few part time jobs, none of which have given him any money, so he finally got a job to help out with bills about a month ago.

He received his check today, $552, and after all this time not paying her any rent or helping out with the bills or care of the house, he finally gave her money. $50. She asked him for more and he refused, thinking he can buy a nice house at an auction with $500. (lol)

Fed up with this she told him to pack up and move out. He refused and she called the police to make him, to which they told her she had to evict him since he had a piece of mail with that address.

He is not on the lease, they have no sublease signed, and he hasn't paid rent save the $50, but that can barely count as he stole her money to fix her car ($500) and bought a PS2.

The mail was a cell phone bill for his phone. To make this worse, she has 2 children that have been staying with us while she's at work and spending the night about a quarter of the time because they're fighting and she doesn't want the kids to hear it. He's horribly irresponsible and is often verbally abusive to the children and her, cursing at her at her uncle's funeral. This is really REALLY wearing her nerves and I'm beginning to worry about her mental health dealing with such a louse.

She really wants him out before the 30 days, honestly worried about his backlash at being kicked out, like stealing her belongings or becoming physically abusive with her or her children to try and 'teach her a lesson'. He has done things like these before, and WILL again if given the chance the police gave him.

How can she get him out right now?

grammadidi · Jul 6, 2007, 10:29 PM

Wow, what a winner! First of all, I am thinking that if the police told her that she has to evict him, that she just might have to go that route. It might help for her to go to the police station and tell them (calmly) the entire story and then ask for advice. In the meantime, if he steals (and if she can prove he has stolen) from her, she should press charges. If he is abusive with her or the children she should report him immediately!

What a mess. I really feel for her. Hmmm... how many men are in your family? Perhaps everyone should 'move in' with her temporarily? I've seen wives pack their husband's belongings and change the locks, so it's difficult to see why he would have to be evicted when he isn't on the lease, doesn't contribute to the household, abuses her and the kids and publicly curses her at a family funeral.

I wonder if a local woman's shelter could give her some suggestions? It's sure worth a try. I think I would call one to see what they said, and try the police when things are NOT in the heat of the moment. Regardless, she should stop sleeping with him immediately, and tell him that the relationship is over, she wants him to move out, and he can sleep on the couch from now on. She should NOT keep any money at home, and not give him a penny or pay any bills in his name.

Hope this helps a bit. Let us know, please!

Didi

canadianhotbox · Jul 7, 2007, 02:06 AM

Originally Posted by jasmin_flower69

Hey. My sister in law's boyfriend has been living with her for about a year and a half. He's had a few part time jobs, none of which have given him any money, so he finally got a job to help out with bills about a month ago.

He received his check today, $552, and after all this time not paying her any rent or helping out with the bills or care of the house, he finally gave her money. $50. She asked him for more and he refused, thinking he can buy a nice house at an auction with $500. (lol)

Fed up with this she told him to pack up and move out. He refused and she called the police to make him, to which they told her she had to evict him since he had a piece of mail with that address.

He is not on the lease, they have no sublease signed, and he hasn't paid rent save the $50, but that can barely count as he stole her money to fix her car ($500) and bought a PS2.

The mail was a cell phone bill for his phone. To make this worse, she has 2 children that have been staying with us while she's at work and spending the night about a quarter of the time because they're fighting and she doesn't want the kids to hear it. He's horribly irresponsible and is often verbally abusive to the children and her, cursing at her at her uncle's funeral. This is really REALLY wearing her nerves and I'm beginning to worry about her mental health dealing with such a louse.

She really wants him out before the 30 days, honestly worried about his backlash at being kicked out, like stealing her belongings or becoming physically abusive with her or her children to try and 'teach her a lesson'. He has done things like these before, and WILL again if given the chance the police gave him.

How can she get him out right now?

This might sound bad but whatever, there are people that you can pay that will come and take him out of there. They are not hard to find, good luck with that.

ScottGem · Jul 7, 2007, 04:58 AM

A lease is not necessary. As long as he can establish residence, then he is considered a tenant and must be dealt with as a tenant.

Didi's suggestion of talking to a Women's shelter is a good one. She might be able to get a restraining order against him that would effectively kick him out. She should immediately start eviction proceedings though.

s_cianci · Jul 8, 2007, 09:34 AM

She packs his belongings, throws them out on the curb and changes the locks. Then if he creates a disturbance she calls the police and has him arrested. Ultimately she may have to proceed with formal eviction proceedings, although I'm not sure that a "piece of mail" gives one a rightful claim to an established legal residence. After all, I get mail addressed to me at my place of employment all the time, but I don't think that gives me the right to sleep there and call it my "home." But meanwhile, while waiting out the 30 days, she proceeds as I've described above.