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jeremy4719 · Jul 2, 2007, 06:54 PM

I am curious what everyone's thoughts are on LOVE vs. HAPPINESS... I am in love with my fiancé and she means a lot to me... But when does the level of happiness vs the power the love, which wins out? I'm hoping I don't have to make this decision, but it is unfortunately a real possibility. Things in my relationship have leveled off (or up in the good way a bit)... We are sitting on level ground with a SLIGHT upward trend for the moment. I just want to know how much a guy should stick around for, if he (myself) isn't happy with the way things are... Lack of time together, lack of sex, lack of the spark... These are just some of the big things that have taken a hold of our relationship for the last 3 months... We are trying to make it...

wickedimp · Jul 3, 2007, 07:38 AM

It's not always rainbows and butterflies, it's compromise that moves things along.

JoeCanada76 · Jul 3, 2007, 07:46 AM

Communication and compromise are two most important elements in a relationship. I also think that your overanalyzing your relationship instead of just trying to enjoy the relationship.

Joe

Dennis777 · Jul 3, 2007, 07:58 AM

Hello.

Love and Happiness go hand and hand or should be. If you have Love on both sides then with a little work you will also have happiness.

Relationships are work, it takes time to learn about each other and we are always changing and growing so what works today will change a little as we do. As long as your both wanting to make it work it will.

In most happiness the bed room and money are the happiness joy or pain. When you work hard and make money the bedroom suffers if you let it (thats why you have to work at making the time you have special). If you don't have money your always down and that makes the bedroom suffer if you let it (thats why you have to work at making the time you have together special).

The key is make the most out of the time you have together. One hour of passion and excitement is better then hours of ignoring each other. Time in a excitement is priceless so use it. Don't let yourself get in a rut and forget all the special things you did for her when you first met. Do them all and more. Sweep her off her feet every day. Make each day a special one and in time you both will be working so hard to make each other happy your not going to have time to think about being happy.

Its up to you, if you want it to work it will.

Good Luck
Dennis777

Dennis777 · Jul 3, 2007, 08:01 AM

WoW

Sorry about the typos the spell check moved some words around...

jeremy4719 · Jul 3, 2007, 08:43 AM

Originally Posted by Jesushelper76

Communication and compromise are two most important elements in a relationship. I also think that your overanalyzing your relationship instead of just trying to enjoy the relationship.

Joe

We have so-so communication and the compromise is on her side pretty much... I am not over analyzing this relationship... It's really not good..

jeremy4719 · Jul 3, 2007, 08:46 AM

Originally Posted by Dennis777

Hello.

Love and Happiness go hand and hand or should be. If you have Love on both sides then with a little work you will also have happiness.

Relationships are work, it takes time to learn about each other and we are always changing and growing so what works today will change a little as we do. As long as your both wanting to make it work it will.

In most happiness the bed room and money are the happiness joy or pain. When you work hard and make money the bedroom suffers if you let it (thats why you have to work at making the time you have special). If you don't have money your always down and that makes the bedroom suffer if you let it (thats why you have to work at making the time you have together special).

The key is make the most out of the time you have together. One hour of passion and excitement is better then hours of ignoring each other. Time in a excitement is priceless so use it. Don't let yourself get in a rut and forget all the special things you did for her when you first met. Do them all and more. Sweep her off her feet every day. Make each day a special one and in time you both will be working so hard to make each other happy your not going to have time to think about being happy.

Its up to you, if you want it to work it will.

Good Luck
Dennis777

This was a great response, but you all still don't see things...

I wake up every morning and think "should i break it off?" , "I'm not happy, but i love her"... Those are not good signs and I don't know if I should continue being with her if I can't get those thoughts/feelings to leave my head... I have absolutely no time with her... To put it in perspective, I see her on average two days a month!! My heart hurts, because I want to love her and care about her and be there, but my mind is saying get out and get out now...

SAB123 · Jul 3, 2007, 12:49 PM

My cousin broke up with his girlfriend of 7 years because she was always working. He wanted it to work but never spent time together. He is much happier with new girlfriend,

woh337 · Jul 3, 2007, 12:53 PM

Originally Posted by SAB123

My cousin broke up with his girlfriend of 7 years because she was always working. He wanted it to work but never spent time together. He is much happier with new girlfriend,

Sometimes, people stay busy because they have to, sometimes they stay busy because they are running away from something. The saddest in the world is that two people in love can't be together. You are here and I am there, there is something wrong with one of us.

Dennis777 · Jul 3, 2007, 01:27 PM

Jeremy.

In some relationships people grow apart, Your mind still wants the Love to be there but its not. If your not happy and your not planing on bringing back the spark then get out and find Mrs. Right and she can find Mr. Right.

Dennis777

jeremy4719 · Jul 3, 2007, 07:49 PM

I do love her, that's why I'm sticking it out and trying to make it... I don't know if it will last or not, but if I don't try with every ounce of sanity I have, then I didn't try hard enough... We'll see what happends I guess...

Shaunta · Jul 4, 2007, 02:48 PM

Originally Posted by jeremy4719

I am curious what everyones thoughts are on LOVE vs. HAPPINESS... I am in love with my fiance and she means a lot to me... But when does the level of happiness vs the power the love, which wins out? I'm hoping I don't have to make this decision, but it is unfortunately a real possibility. Things in my relationship have leveled off (or up in the good way a bit)... We are sitting on level ground with a SLIGHT upward trend for the moment. I just want to know how much a guy should stick around for, if he (myself) isn't happy with the way things are.... Lack of time together, lack of sex, lack of the spark... These are just some of the big things that have taken a hold of our relationship for the last 3 months... We are trying to make it....

Uh oh what's wrong with your relationship? You don't have that spark? Lack of connection?? I know how that feels... I know when me and my boyfriend broke up the first time and we got back together that "spark" wasn't there but that was somethihng that came about gradually... You can only wait so olong... Sometimes well not right now but I use to just sit here and think to myself am I wasting my time with him? Nothing is going right... But in the end it all worked out... I wish you the best... Send me a message...

jeremy4719 · Jul 4, 2007, 05:26 PM

Originally Posted by Shaunta

Uh oh whats wrong with your relationship?? You dont have that spark?? Lack of connection??? I know how that feels...I know when me and my boyfriend broke up the first time and we got back together that "spark" wasnt there but that was somethihng that came about gradually.....You can only wait so olong...Sometimes well not right now but I use to just sit here and think to myself am I wasting my time with him?? Nothing is going right....But in the end it all worked out....I wish you the best...Send me a message....

Hey Shaunta... Thanks for your comments... Hit me up on how you and your guy are doing.