[nightpulse]

Ok so I re-met an old friend of mine in a bar a few weeks ago. We got chatting and they exchanged email addresses. We started talking over the net and then he asked me out. We were going out for perhaps a few weeks and we had slept together a few times and then he broke it off saying he needed space. He said he didn't want a relationship right now and that he was happy just being him. So we decided to just 'be friends' and I wasn't thrilled at the idea as I have feelings for him but we discussed the idea of being friends with benefits. I wasn't thrilled by the idea but thought it was for the best as my last relationship was abusive and took me nearly three years to get over. I still have nightmares about my ex as he did awful things to me. This new guy said I would get hurt by him as he can't say no to sex and he has a lot of girl friends he is flirty with. I myself am Bi and flirt with girls all the time so it doesn't bother me at all.
Anyway I was at a party with him the other day and he started kissing and cuddling me in front of his friends though he was the one that said the whole just friend's thing. He has invited me up to town for a few drinks which is good but whenever I ask if he can come round mine to watch some films or ask if I can go round his he fobs me off with excuses. I am so confused I feel like he is ignoring me and it hurts. He was at a friend's house and got stoned, he said he could have slept with a girl but didn't because she was passed out does that mean he doesn't like me? I am trying to keep calm and not push him into anything he doesn't want to do as this will scare him off as I think he will grow feeling in time. What should I do? Does he like me as more than a friend and if I stick with it will he feel things for me?

[CinnamonBrownie]

"Does he like me as more than a friend and if i stick with it will he feel things for me?"

Based on the entirety of what you said, the best predictor of this man's behavior is how he treats other women. It sounds like he likes to keep a group of women available to him. He knows he has a certain amount of emotional leverage over you, but also that you expect exclusivity... And frankly, I don't think he's going to do that.

Are you comfortable being just one of his many girls? If not I think you're going to have to move on. I hope this helps.

[I wish]

Seems pretty clear that he just wants friends with benefits. The fact that you have feelings for him makes you twists all his words and actions into thinking that he might like you more.

The bottom line is, he knows how you feel, so if he wanted something serious, he would let you know and you don't have to guess around.

Lastly, as long as you're willing to go along with the friends with benefits arrangement, then why would he need to be more serious with you? He's already getting what he wants. He has you as his friends with benefits, no real commitment, no strings, and he can go meet other girls.

[Devorameira]

Iwish is right. He only wants to be a friend with benefits and it sounds to me like you can't handle that arrangement.

Since your feelings and some jealously are sneaking into your "arrangement", I'd suggest you break it off with him and find someone that is interested in forming a relationship with you.