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This was a 4 month stink, there is no need to find closure. You had a fling and when the infatuation wore off there was nothing left keeping her with you. We don't do NC only to make a date later on...

You'll just know... there will be a pause in conversation where you both look at each other and the feeling will come over you... that's a tough one to explain haha, just let it happen naturally and...

How could you contacting her right now benefit your situation at all... She came out and told you that it wasn't going to work. Her looking unhappy when you see her is just her feeling awkward around...

It sounds like he probably likes you (best guess answer). To me it would be best to just tell him, next time he calls you or however he contacts you just let him know; I can only be your friend. Even...

Well unfortunately myself or someone else could only sit here and attempt to decipher what's going on... No way for us, or you for that matter to know what he is thinking. Either he has feelings and...

Great to see there are some familiar faces still giving great advice!

Wow, haven't been to this site in almost 1.5 years... Got me through my "life ending relationship" haha... Oh how things have...

I admire your perseverance and ability to keep taking an a$$ whooping. But you know that doing things like this will never allow you to move on and heal. You were hoping for some answers on this trip...

Hey toronto,

All the best with this new relationship! I guess we can have our concerns about it, when just a couple weeks ago you were going through a rough patch. I had a lovely rebound, while I...

Have to spread some rep first mark but kudos on that answer.

Funny how the reasons behind why she broke up with slowly come out. And the longer you wait around the more she is going to tell you....

I think what mark says here is key, moving way will help speed up the process and be a good thing for you ONLY if you do cut ties with her. If you continue with what you are doing you are only moving...

Gear,

I think a move would be a great thing for you. Change of scenery, living with friends, away from her (not easy to get together). A few years ago one of my best friends went through a hard...

I'd really hope he is doing the right thing... never seen resistance like this though. Sometimes we just have to experience the hurt before we start to take this advice seriously. He'll figure it out...

The calm before the storm... just wait for it

Hope this thong and "personal" business has knocked her down a few rungs on that pedestal... Are you starting to see that she is not that perfect girl you thought she was..

That's malicious,...

To say that everyone here just gave up hope is an insult. How about we all just realized that chasing something was the wrong thing to do. For months of my NC I hoped to hell that she would come...

She's not crazy, the way she is acting is VERY VERY common behavior for the dumper. So recognize that most ex's act like this... It's how they cope with the guilt, and you can't really blame them....

But I think that's your problem. You think that if you convey this to her she will want you back. I appreciate your honesty and yes, how you acted probably contributed to it. But the fact is that her...

Exactly, she's just standing on this pedestal you've made for her... Honestly its during break-ups that you get blown away by what your ex is capable of. After four years of being with a girl that I...

So true, you start to catch on after awhile and don't give them the satisfaction. In the beginning my ex would contact me, get out of me that I still loved her or whatever than I would not hear from...

Exactly, and it's a horrible idea.

Plonak!!

Ahhhhhh what are you doing! Well I am not going to say anything about it, you as much as anybody know you screwed up. That message you sent him probably did nothing but make him feel...

You are dragging yourself through the gantlet here. Think about it, it's been two months and you are no better off than you were when this first happened. In all honesty you are going to be miserable...

You respond though... doesn't make it OK.

411 is right, no you won't meet anyone else like her... then again when you do meet someone new you can say the same thing about her. You are going to meet someone that is not going to lose interest...

Toronto,

Just be thankful that she is not contacting you to thank you. You don't need the hassle. You are doing no contact remember, the least she tries to reach out to you the better. And...

Maybe he decided the age gap was something he couldn't handle... Or feared his family couldn't.

We couldn't possibly know what he's thinking or how you were in bed.

Did you think of asking why?

I agree with everyone here...

Its hard not to take offense to something like this but if he is anything like myself he likes to have activities that are just for him... Its healthy for people in...

Well just realize the pain is temporary. Take all this as a learning experience and don't tolerate and be the doormat for someone like this again. Staying with him as long as you did was a mistake...

Even when doing NC I thinks its pretty easy for the dumper to get the simple message "I want you back" to you.

I wouldn't respond for anything less.

Says it all right there. Everyone should use that motto when they date.

Haha, well just enjoy the date and don't take it too seriously. No pressure. I say just give the mail to you friend and let him give it to her. No need to text, and definitely no need to text before...

And chances are by then you won't even care to. Its funny how time heals you. Thinking about how hurtin' I was in the first few months of my breakup makes me smile.

I'd say the only thing that could make it difficult are the credit problems... but its still easily done. Just don't ignore the problem and work together to correct it.

But if making more money...

Just seems like too many problems to overcome... Not just jobs and driving a car are affected...

Can't get health insurance, can't travel, have to walk on egg shells to avoid detection, can't use...

The above comment holds a lot of truth... Use this time to get things in your life together and find happiness on your own. Then and only then can any reconciliation take place, when you have a clear...

Common Gear! What's it going to take to get you to listen!

I don't think I have ever seen a thread where somebody has resisted the same solid advise of so many people.

Well fair enough and good that you are honest about your shortfalls in this break-up

But how often do you hear of someone giving their ex 2000 bucks because they feel guilty. It will come off as...

Well I will tell you what popped into my head instantly after reading that. GUILT TRIP! If someone sent me that I would immediately think they were trying to make me feel bad or guilty, and that I...

I agree with the others... Trust was shattered when you fell for the grass is greener on the other side thing. I would be hard pressed to believe you too. Trust is what killed the idea of me ever...

Hey yoso,

Well I can't say my NC was all that great in the early days.. But eventually the games and bull$hit get to you and you realize that responding to them gets you no where but feeling bad....

When he actually lets himself get to that point... Seems to me he enjoys getting kicked in the balls. Don't say nobody warmed you when all this goes to hell.

Well let me say this, and this is was I really think. You're so young darlin, there are going to be so many other guys so don't think even for a second that this guy is the be all and end all. Being...

Well as Jack Johnson says in "flake"... your first loves your hardest love. I don't think you'll ever forget that one... for the simple fact that you experience so many firsts with that person.
...

Hey kaitou,

I definitely understand what you are saying.

Don't get me wrong though, my NC was definitely for me and still is... A part of me actually feels bad that I ignore her (how I can...

How long have you been feeling this way about him? Is there anything in your life making you feel down or lonely... sometimes those feelings can make you miss what you used to have irrationally.
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Well I don't think this relationship was good on either end... Just from the way you talk about it, it seems like you weren't really into it and that you kind of forced it. You resisted the whole way...

So what's the story with the contact you two have right now? You have to fill us in on that stuff, break up included.

Well I can say that holding out hope like you are will get in the way of you moving on and feeling better... So you have to assume he's not coming back, but easier said than done right?

No...

Happy Birthday Dare! Keep fighting the NC fight!

1) Uninterested, distant, no sex, short tempered, not spending nearly as much time as you, less involved... Think about it hard... I am sure the signs were pretty clear even if you initially thought...